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This newspaper page contains 13 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Dillon Tribune
Location
Dillon, Montana, United States of America
Date
Mar 03, 1911
Page
7
In this reflects on how fairy tale endings mislead about married life. Tempted by youthful optimism, couples face storms and quarrels as part of a natural discipline in life. The piece notes universal tough lessons, moral guidance, and the sense of a higher guiding hand shaping destiny.
Squadron Corporal Major Eggleton of the Royal Horse Guards (Blues) retires after 21 years in the army. A famed swordsman he has cut an apple from a kneeling assistant’s neck and severed apples placed on a man's head with precise strokes. He has won multiple military tournament prizes and performed before Queen Victoria and kings Edward and George.
A writer toiling on a comic opera libretto discovers a new joke but decides it has no fit in the work. He tests the joke thoroughly then omits it and continues drafting.
The fragment reads a paradox on work and rest, suggesting labor without leisure breeds drudgery and implying a value on balance or respite.
Dillon banker and baseball enthusiast Matt Barry, known for sensational field plays, may secure a big league chance within a year or two. Promoter John McClosky of the Union League praises Barry as a daisy and intends to give him a strong trial as a potential regular second baseman.
Bozeman hosts a state tournament with 17 of 28 accredited high schools attending. Visitors arrive Thursday, view campus Thursday morning, and join a gala parade on Main Street. The schedule includes basketball rounds, extemporaneous speaking, tours, a reception, and a high school championship.
In a comedy of misdialed calls Mrs. Yorick and Constantina juggle a run of wrong numbers and attracted suitors. Dr. Delevan intends to see Evelyn while Constantina plans a matinee, leading to a humorous realization that the faulty line keeps mixing up Yorick family members and dates.
An advertisement for MI-DNA or MI-O-NA stomach tablets sells a 50 cent remedy guaranteed to relieve stomach distress in five minutes and promises a money back guarantee if indigestion or related symptoms persist. The copy targets men with weak stomachs and claims long lasting results if treated properly.
A witty exchange notes the humor of missing arrivals from ship to shore and the challenge of later missing an aeroplane. The dialogue hints at persistence and unforeseen gaps in timing, with a playful nod to frequent near-misses in travel.
Oldcommutte claims three years in Burbanville while Newcommutte recalls five and notes two years on trains, highlighting a playful dispute about residence and travel. The exchange underscores memory gaps and urban commuting as mixed timelines.
A humorous exchange centers on diet with Meat Eater admitting nuts upset his stomach and Vegetarian asking which nuts. Meat Eater replies with a pun about donghnats, a playful misspelling or joke.
The passage extols the appeal of receiving letters and praises high grade stationery as more pleasing than ordinary paper, asserting that the best paper is made by a noted manufacturer. It presents a promotional tone highlighting quality writing supplies.
An advertisement extols Eaton, Crane & Pyke papers as superior to no name brands. It highlights their Made in Berkshire line and urges comparisons to prove the product's refined quality.
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