27 Oct 1904
Page 1
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This newspaper page contains 15 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Denver Tribune
Location
Denver, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Oct 27, 1904
Page
1
An anti drug crusade urges readers to test the Creator’s plan behind whiskey tobacco and coffee. The article warns of lifelong addiction, health ruin, and social leveling by nature while promoting Postum as a healthier alternative and a path to renewed health and productivity.
Indiana has nominated four men for vice president since the Civil War: Schuyler Colfax and Charles W. Fairbanks on the Republican ticket and William H. English and Thomas A. Hendricks on the Democratic ticket. Colfax ran with Grant in 1868, Hendricks with Tilden in 1876 and with Cleveland in 1884, English with Hancock in 1880. Only Colfax and Hendricks became vice presidents. Hendricks was defeated in 1876 but won in 1884. English was defeated in 1880.
This column gathers humorous snippets from various papers with playful ones about fasting travelers dry sermons and a sentimental moonlight exchange. The laughs hinge on quick wits and caricatured social scenes across several voices.
A police magistrate questions how a thief removed a watch from a pocket using a safety catch. The suspect offers to teach the method for ten dollars, claiming it is a professional secret.
A clock laments quiet operation while a clock key jokes about bankruptcy and appointing a receiver to wind up affairs. An inquisitive caller questions the bizarre script as the humorist notes the line may be a sale but not a joke if prospects fail.
An antiquarian named Brown returns to the Highlands with a shooting box and a celebratory display. His first appearance in the region draws a curious crowd as he climbs and parades his old-fashioned gear amid festive chatter.
Teaspot tells Hawkins they struck at the shop again claiming lightning speed. J. recalls the saying that lightning seldom strikes twice in the same place, prompting a wary judge’s comment on the clash.
A compilation of light vignettes and quips about Congress, society, writers, pets, fortune tellers, and workers. The jokes play on manners, satire, and social clichés with punch lines about money, bosses, and отпуск.
In a domestic dialogue a daughter recalls that Mr Gotrex proposed after he attempted a kiss in the parlor. The mother questions how such pressure led to marriage, while the daughter asserts she would never speak to him again.
Jack and Tom converse about a wedding and living arrangements with Tom stating he will marry the next day and will rely on his bride's father for support.
In a New Orleans Picayune fragment Nora McCarthy greets her miserly uncle at the gate calling him to see how much the baby resembles him. The uncle, wary yet amused, quips that all his relatives take after him since he earned his pinching ways.
A Girard Kansas veteran of Co H 55 Indiana narrates his recovery from a crushing blow and weeks of dizziness and insomnia after using Dr Williams Pink Pills for Pale People. He reports improved sleep circulation and resumed work by mid February 1893 and says the pills cured his nervousness and blood difficulties. They are sold by all druggists worldwide.
The Chicago News discusses how Scandinavian youths begin training at fifteenth, learn a full trade by twenty five to thirty, and travel for work worldwide. It cites examples in Paris and New England, contrasts with American shop life, and notes discipline versus boredom in single-task roles.
Rev Jacob D Van Doren of Fond du Lac Wisconsin testifies to relief from kidney disorders after using Dean's Kidney Pills. He reports being housebound for days, with complications improved and kidney secretions regulated. Pills sold by all dealers at 50 cents by Foster Milburn Co Buffalo N Y.
Rev Dr Percy Grant told the League for Political Education in New York that the next New Yorker will be 6 feet 3 inches tall and a prize fighter in build. He urged physical training as essential in public schools, noting 26 percent of national guardsmen failed physical standards.
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