19 Mar 1904
Page 1
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This newspaper page contains 7 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Denton Journal
Location
Denton, Maryland, United States of America
Date
Mar 19, 1904
Page
1
Professor Smythe, on his way to play at the Globe Theater, is lured into a rich dinner by a mysterious host. After a lavish feast, he is imprisoned. a stranded thief reveals he stole to feed a starving family. The host uncovers the truth, excuses Smythe, and the professor departs amid apologies.
A farmer lists his children with humorous pride and critique. Freddie is a soap businessman, Szekiel a doctor, Mary Ann educated and sought after, Vennery a preacher, Pete a rising politician, Willum hardworking with family life, and Tom mocked for lack of skill yet praised as a poet.
In a west Scotland village a church steeple’s weathercock sparks a mock dispute. A leading heritor warns wind could topple stones. the architect says the cock spins with the wind. The heritor quips about making the cardinal points rotate too.
Aunty Smith narrates her life through multiple marriages set against slavery and postwar life. She recalls Caesar Marshall, Miss Betty, and mistresses, the camp meeting, Pearl Rosy, and losing husbands to war and trade, ending with faith and a vision of future peace with Caesar and Rosie.
An Italian recalls Luigi who sailed to Naples. His wife's wedding ring supposedly dropped overboard as she saw him off. The ship docked at Nervi for three days. A fish was given to the captain, Luigi was asked to clean it, and a hard object was found. Eu genio and his friend spar over whether it was the ring or a hone.
A Cleveland Plain Dealer quip notes Billings thermometer swings to extremes. At freezing it reads several degrees low and in July heat around 90 degrees, it shows 95. The joke asks where it hangs and replies that hanging has nothing to do with it, only the way it lies.
A wife urges her ailing husband to hold on as doctors report improvement. The man laments that no paper has called him the illustrious patient today, worrying more about recognition than his fate.
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