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This newspaper page contains 10 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Denton Journal
Location
Denton, Maryland, United States of America
Date
Aug 12, 1911
Page
3
A vaudeville pair uses a church prayer book to jot down an idea for their act. The feminine partner leaves the book behind, then the clergyman reveals a memo in the back warning to kick father if the pistol goes off. The book is never claimed.
A poetic fragment reflects on humility and enduring virtue. It contrasts transient fame with a quiet, content life. The speaker suggests that lowly deeds and a simple, faithful path outlast royal titles and public glory.
A German wet goods shopkeeper loses trade to a neighbor after a customer jokes that a rival’s sign pulls business. He responds by adding a new sign, “Ticker Inside,” only to be told the clock conceals the ticker. In Real and Ideal, Henry Pettitt’s The Sailor’s Knot features actor George Barrett mistaken for a sailor’s duties during rehearsal, prompting laughter when the cast learns Barrett is recently retired from the navy.
A Nadonmu Magazine excerpt parodies Southern family scenes with Uncle Witham and niece dialogue. It slyly mocks pretension and schooling in a garden exchange while another note praises Robert Smith, a new Dutler, for adopting a forthright employment reference and revealing linguistic misfires.
In a Gilbert tale an afternoon ballet outing shows a crying dancer told she is not better than she ought to be and musters Gilbert’s gentle insistence she is fine. A stage mix up prompts Tesze Bond to joke about a brown paper passeul as a messenger dodges cast and crew.
Anecdotes recount Sothern dining with actors and a clever bread prank. A waiter places bread at each plate. Sothern’s dog removes it unseen, bread reappears after repeated fetches, until the hungry troupe is amused and the bread corner is emptied. The trick diffuses tension and ends with the bread returned.
Marshall P. Wilder relates a humorous self story from his London engagement in music halls. He recalls following Consul the educated monkey on bills and two inebriated Englishmen misreading the act, waking briefly to misinterpret the performance as a tale by the Daughter, prompting sleepy confusion etc.
An Episcopal bishop visiting a New England town irritably asks why the host cannot “descend into hell with the rest of the congregations” during the Creed. The piece recalls the era’s widespread use of the catchphrase “What, never?” and notes large early performances of Pinafore with forty two companies playing at the time.
An English comedian recalls performing for a noble audience in London and the audience's faint reaction. A young peer watched as he removed grease paint and complimented a joke about a pancake slipping through a gridiron. The passage ends with a quip about wearing glasses for a sprained knee and a sharp aside from the Toledo Blade.
A brief Chicago Record-Herald quotation critiques men who crave batting glory yet avoid fielding, highlighting a timeless tension between offense and defense in the game.
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