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This newspaper page contains 15 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Cumberland Press
Location
Cumberland, Maryland, United States of America
Date
Jan 03, 1916
Page
3
The Cumberland Press lists subscription rates at five dollars a year in advance and per month, with mail and carrier delivery details. Advertising rates require application, and communications go to 109 Baltimore Street. phone numbers 592 and 593. The paper notes daily carrier service and telephone order delivery.
The Altoona area endures a grippe outbreak as influenza confines many to beds or homes. The piece notes the invisible danger, urges calm and better tempers, and reflects on public concern and resilience amid a harsh midwinter season.
The article explains that federal legislators are immune from arrest only while conducting official duties and that they remain subject to the law as private citizens. It argues immunity cannot shield criminal actions and commends Buchanan for accepting arrest and trial like other defendants.
Hundreds of Galesburg residents began paying their bills today. Those who cannot finish by today may complete payments through January 8 as part of a local Pay Up Week observance.
The Cumberland Press credits its success to United Press collaboration hosting top correspondents in Europe and across battle fronts. It lists major exclusives and scoops from January to December 1915, featuring interviews with Pashitch, Zepelin, Okuma, Bryan, and many others, plus landmark front page revelations from Berlin, London, Paris, and Washington.
A quirky collection of verse and quips features lines about a foolish man behind a mule, gossiping women, shy Rye with glasses, a sage and fool exchange on radium and common sense, and a jokey exchange about marital truth. Carrie McHale lives at Newport Kentucky.
Washington January 3 reports that Cy Sullo way a New Hampshire congressman has the longest whiskers of any member of any Congress.
A comic verse describes a person obsessed with paying bills on the first of the month and the tenth. The speaker revels in checks, debt statements, and the clank of coins as a gleeful ritual, while lamenting the dull period between due dates. The tone is playful and satirical about commerce and credit.
A speaker laments a lie by a man who acted as if he taught him. The utterance condemns the deceit while questioning the insult added by such deception, reflecting a practical stance on respect and integrity.
The author mocks American Indians and their customs, contrasting them with supposed modernization. He jokes about Indian dress, scalping, taxation, farming, and resistance to census takers, suggesting the Indians’ delay in adopting Christianity and defining a "fancy farmer" as someone who fancies he is farming.
A reader from Paxton Illinois asks if a beggar who capitalizes on his ragged condition can be said to live off his rents. Rodrigo replies with caution on public perception and social nuance.
An anxious note asks whether Mary Smelter should be kept out of the Names Club and provides her Wilmington Ohio address. The writer recalls a husband who becomes highly peeved at first marriage when his wife does not talk to him but later gains some sense.
A brief note humorously credits a neighbor with a quip about looking on the brief side and jokingly claims she aims to be an optometrist someday.
In a local exchange, Professor Heeragin claims credit for restoring Jabez Botts’s hearing. Botts’s friend notes Botts is hard of hearing and that asking Botts directly is best. The scene centers on the informal verification of the medical claim in a small town.
A stream of comic vignettes riffs on time wasting and frugal woes. It parodies male arrogance, marital woes, and consumer temptations, ending with quips about mirrors, youth, and a rustling skirt. The piece reads like a satirical household sketch from a bygone era.
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