They Tell Me Clerk Is A Capital Book Seller
A narrator praises a clerk seen with a volume, calling him a strong seller. The joke hinges on the clerk's confident stance and the book he carries as a metaphor for sales prowess.
View this page and access billions of articles with a 7-day free trial.
Start Free Trial
This is just the beginning! Our collection holds over 300 years of history, including rare newspapers, obituaries, marriage records, birth records, and so much more—most of which you won’t find anywhere else!
Not what you were looking for? Search our billions of articles
Articles on This Page
This newspaper page contains 20 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Cranbury Press
Location
Cranbury, New Jersey, United States of America
Date
Mar 17, 1916
Page
7
Cascarets advertise relief for sluggish bowels and digestion
An old advertisement promotes Cascarets as a cure for lazy liver, bloated stomach, and foul gases. It claims quick overnight relief, a 10 cent box, no gripes, and months of clean bowels, with humor interjected by a cartoon caption.
Foregone Conclusion
A farmer sold 1,479 bushels of wheat at 1.17 dollars per bushel, yielding total revenue of 1,734.? The playful riddle pairs a math problem with a joke answer about a boy and an automobile.
Freckles Gone with Ethine Double Strength Remedy
An advertisement asserts ethine double strength clears freckles. Apply nightly and morning, a small amount suffices, with a money back guarantee if it fails. Ends with a joke about principles and prejudices.
Benzamini advertises quick sore throat relief
A Baldwin New York reader praises Milburn Pharmacal Co. Benzamini for sore throat and tonsillitis noting it often cures children without a doctor and that a bottle is kept at home. local druggists can supply it.
A Humorous Quotation in Baltimore American
The Baltimore American quotes two wry remarks about a man and his wife. The lines read His wife made a man of him and He looks like a homemade job reflecting light humor on transformation and appearance.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Baltimore American
Nailing a Lie Won’t Always Keep It Down
A compact editorial notes that exposing deceit may not silence falsehoods, as persistent rhetoric and repeated claims can sustain public belief despite exposure. The piece analyzes challenges in truth-telling and the limits of countering lies with fact alone.
Mother's Gratitude for Father John's Medicine
A mother of four, Mrs. F. A. Conrad of Altoona Pennsylvania, praises Father John's Medicine for curing her children's colds and croup. She says the medicine is safe for kids and free from dangerous drugs, noting its nourishment and gentle laxative effect. Also mentions Hoxsie's Croup Remedy priced at 50 cents from A P Hoxsie of Buffalo.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
F. A. Conrad
Altoona
Father John
John
Fr. A. Conrad
Second Avenue
German Assaults Press Verdun Front as War Rages
Reports describe renewed German infantry assaults along a Verdun arc from Bethincourt to Le Mort Homme while artillery battles widen on the western front. Shelling intensifies from Alsace to the Meuse as air combat and raids continue. Dutch frontier reopenings and supply raids near Conflans are noted.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
London
Verdun
le Mort Homme
Bois Bourrus
Verdun Bombardment Intensifies as Front Lines Hold
London reports the French bombardment of German positions around Verdun has stalled infantry attacks by the Crown Prince's army after German troops reached a small French trench north of Bix. Russians push in East Galicia taking trenches. Czarist forces advance toward Bagdad. Italians renew assault on Gorizia on the Isonzo front as heavy shelling continues.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
London
Verdun
Bethincourt
le Mort Homme
Bois Des Buttes
Aisne
Brieulles
Egypt
Peyton
Sollum
Caucasus
Galicia
Riga
Bix
Dniester
Persia
Kirind
Bagdad
German Resources Ample for War Needs, Ironmasters Say
Berlin reports Dr. Springorum president of the German Ironmasters Association declared Germany’s natural resources will prevent Britain from crippling the German war effort. He spoke at the association’s annual meeting in Dusseldorf about sustaining industry and economy for the army.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Berlin
Germany
Springorum
German Ironmasters Association
Dusseldorf
Verdun Drive Ending Signals Dutch Border Reopening
The Dutch Belgian border area near Maastricht in Limburg partly reopened after weeks of closure tied to the Verdun crisis. Dutch observers interpret this as suggesting Germany believes its Verdun offensive is over. Despatches report 31 German hospital trains with Verdun wounded passed through Luxembourg.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
London
Verdun
Maastricht
Limburg
Holland
Luxembug
Trebizond Gates In Imperial World War Updates
Dispatches report American Consul in Trebizond seizing German Consulate archives as Russian forces press toward Trebizond. German and Turkish troops evac Ispahan amid Russian advances. Bulgarian Front losses cited. Varna and Fauvette mine incident noted.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Rome
Constantinople
State Department
Trebizond
Rizeh
Black Sea
Ispahan
Te‘heran
Persia
Danube
Rustchuk
Caucasus
Turkey
Aegean
Petrograd
Stripa
Varna
Fauvette
England
War News Summary From Front Lines and Home Front
French aviators exploited clear skies observing vast enemy reinforcements pouring toward the front. Sweden prepares to defend Stockholm with 700000 kroner raised under government sanction. Harold Tennant introduces the army estimates bill in Parliament. Turks claim British losses of 5000 in Felahie while London calls it reconnaissance. Smuts’ forces clash with Germans west of Taveta. Germans retreat. Vienna reports repulsed Russian attacks on Dniester and Besarabian fronts.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Teuton
Sweden
Copenhagen
Stockholm
Harold J. Tennant
House of Commons
Felahie
London
Jan Christian Smuts
German East Africa
Taveta
Vienna War Office
Dniester
Besarabian
California Syrup of Figs advertised for children
An old advertisement touts California Syrup of Figs as a safe, gentle laxative for children and adults. It claims the product cleanes the stomach liver and bowels, relieves cross sick behavior, and includes dosing and price details for a 50 cent bottle.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
California
It Takes Two to Settle a Quarrel
Quoted line contrasts two paths to conflict resolution with a jury to settle disputes. Wording underscores shared responsibility in resolving quarrels and legal matters through dialogue or judicial process.
Allen's Foot-FASE Foot Powder Advertisement Claim
The notice advertises Allen's Foot Fase antiseptic powder for shoes and foot baths to relieve painful feet and instantly ease stings. It claims nationwide sale and a free sample offer, with an address for the supplier. It also oddly mentions Luxembourg having an area of 1 000 square miles.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Allen
Omsted
le Ros
Louxemburg
Politician Discusses Speaking Kindly of Adversaries
Senator Sorgum weighs whether a man should speak warmly of a political foe. He says it can signal fearlessness at times. The remark reflects cautious civility in public discourse.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Sorghum
Jad Salts Ad Violin Kidney Health Ad
An old advertisement urges high water intake to flush kidneys and avoid urinary trouble. It touts Jad Salts as a grape and lemon lithia drink believed to cleanse kidneys, reduce bladder irritation, and neutralize urine acids. The copy promises quick relief and ongoing kidney health benefits.
Theatrical Gossip and Beauty Ads Echo Aged Eyes
A fragmented column mocks women talking over each other and remarks that eyes reveal age. An ad for Marine Eye Remedy Co. Chicago promotes eye bags and requests for eye care products, ending with a note on how the word it blunts arguments.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Thea
Marine Eye Remedy Co
Chicago
Eye Bagok
Also Mentioned on This Page
Pictar
Bright
Doan
New York
James Peattie
Main St
Beacon
N. Y
Dean
F. W. Crane
149Th St
Ridney Pills
Foster-Milburn Co
Buffalo, N. Y
Bocker
Fletcher
Hoxsie
Buffalo
I Watson E. Coleman
Washington, D.C
Alsace
Kaiser
Meuse
Woevre
Verdun Front
Algace
Belgium
Amsterdam
Entente
Conflans
Metz
Gorizia
Somme River
Argonne Forest
Banje-Sapt
Vosges
Verdun Drive
Trebizond Gates
Wen
Grandville Road
Grand Rapids, Mich
Dauce Bull
Acce
Cros
B. W. Ghove
Canada
Europe
Ottawa
J. S. Crawford
East Genesee Street
Syracuse, N. Y
Search the Cranbury Press Today with a Free Trial
We want people to find what they are looking for at NewspaperArchive. We are confident that we have the newspapers that will increase the value of your family history or other historical research. With our 7-day free trial, you can view the documents you find for free.
Not Finding What You Were Looking for on This Page of The Cranbury Press?
People find the most success using advanced search. Try plugging in keywords, names, dates, and locations, and get matched with results from the entire collection of newspapers at NewspaperArchive!
Browse Newspapers
You can also successfully find newspapers by these browse options. Explore our archives on your own!
By Location
Browse by location and discover newspapers from all across the world.
By Date
Browse by date and find publications for a specific day or era.
By Publication
Browse old newspaper publications to find specific newspapers.