The Silent Burglar Joke Panel
A Philadelphia Press humor panel notes a husband’s quip about burglars. The wife fears quiet and noise, delivering a wry take on nerves around household security.
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Newspaper
Corydon Democrat
Location
Corydon, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Mar 04, 1903
Page
7
A Philadelphia Press humor panel notes a husband’s quip about burglars. The wife fears quiet and noise, delivering a wry take on nerves around household security.
The article highlights rapid Western Canada development drawing over 100000 American settlers. It cites Mears in Cavalier County North Dakota who earned 4598.20 from 260 acres including wheat oats flax and speltz. It notes liberal Canadian laws and government agencies in multiple U.S. cities to provide farming guidance and rates.
In a tense scene a bettor stakes on Fayaway securing first place while cautioning about finances if the final race costs too much, underscoring high nerves before the finish. The remark hints at betting pressure and potential consequences of a costly last event.
Club trips to the West Northwest and Southwest on the first and third Tuesdays of February March and April 1903 offered at low rates. For details see nearest Agent or address C A Asterlin T P A Fort Wayne Ind 285.
The Slaby Area German wireless telegraph system can operate only over comparatively short distances, constraining its practical use.
In Estes Park Colorado General Funston complained at painted soap advertisements on rocks and cliffs along a mountain road. He vowed to remove the signs and later spent his own funds to scrub them off, leaving faint ghost traces where the paint had been heaviest.
A man in a four passenger Dover street car demanded a seat and mocked the benches as four or five. The clash drew a rebuke from the other riders and the car hissed with the insult taken back by the four other passengers as one rose to depart. In the exchange a passenger joked the benches fitted four three humans and one car hog.
The Philadelphia Record quotes a light device line about life as sport and performance with a wry tone. The excerpt frames existence as a public arena where everyone acts as a kicker on life’s stage.
China exports about 400000 dollars worth of human hair annually sourced largely from living and deceased paupers and malefactors. The grim supply feeds the wig and cosmetic industries abroad.
Advertises custom rubber stamps and self inking daters with a new ink and inking information. Offers a catalogue from Lock Box 219, Fort Wayne, Indiana.
The Philadelphia Times quips that the saying lacks factual basis and suggests a sharper variant. The exchange notes that a tempest in a coffee pot would have grounds for its claim, playing on the double meaning of grounds.
The M, K, T Railroad promotes its Industrial Department to help locate sites for industries along its lines. Write if interested to receive the book Business Chances and more information. Contact James Barker, Genl Pass Agent, 204 Wainwright Bldg, St. Louis. The note adds a line about electric arc lighting with carbons charged by volatile substances being pursued abroad.
Sale of tickets at all stations begins Feb 15 and runs daily through April 30 1903. Get details from nearest agent or C A Asterlin Fort Wayne Ind. A monument to Dante is to be erected in Rome.
Perfect passenger service highlights comfort and modern travel on the Nickel Plate Road with connections. Berth rates are less than half the price of regular Pullman car service. For details contact the nearest agent or C A Asterlin T P A Wayne Ind. 284.
A fragment notes a late night proposal from Marie George and hints at bold bets by men. It then mentions Mrs Austin praising Buckswheat cakes and a claim about doubling the world gold supply in the next ten years. It advertises Mrs Winslow's Soothing Syrup for teething with a 25 cent bottle.
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