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This newspaper page contains 16 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Coatesville Herald
Location
Coatesville, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Dec 28, 1911
Page
4
Wanted farmers and hands in Arkansas for winter opportunity with profits from portable saw mill, cord wood, pasta and stave blocks. Two men with $600 to operate, single men can buy farms, 25,000 acres offered near county seat, pay $12 to $16.50 per acre begin first week in January. Address H A MelIntosh Box 304 Indianapolis for particulars.
Mr Keyne asks about short term bonds while Mr Henpeck rejects government bonds and matrimonial bonds, showing a tense finance discussion about investment options. The exchange highlights differing positions on bond types.
Announcement promoting liquid bluing avoidance and advocating Red Cross Ball Blue as the pure blue option. Includes stray line about Unclearly “Hewitt” and Jewett with a puzzled, informal tone.
The text contains miscellaneous statements on fire prevention with water, ancient lightning rods, Brazilian irrigation, a stomach remedy, and a proverb about mice and people. It reads as a collage of product pitches and trivia with no coherent news event or narrative.
Agricultural colleges provide courses from one week to four years with flexible entrance requirements. Facilities include extensive farm land, field plots, orchards, livestock, and laboratories. The instructional staff comes from top institutions to teach practical science and theory, with short courses for those unable to commit long terms.
Purdue University Agricultural Extension announces a branch seed laboratory of the Bureau of Plant Industry Washington to assist Indiana farmers. It tests purity and germination for clovers alfalfa and grasses, provides reports on weed seeds and impurities and identifies seeds with no charge for tests. Samples should include about four tablespoons from top middle and bottom of sacks.
An Englishman in a frock coat visits a New York shop asking for a shirt to be laundered with a tight deadline. After the clerk explains the short time, the man insists and grows angry, prompting the bellboy to suggest buying a third shirt.
The ad quotes two readers from North Carolina and Brooklyn describing scalp conditions including itching, burning, eczema, and hair loss. Both credit Cuticura Soap and Ointment with complete or rapid relief after months or years of unsuccessful treatment. The notice invites free samples by mail from Cuticura, Boston.
A village shopkeeper who kept close accounts grows wary of a schoolma’am’s sweets flirtation. She coerces repeated gift hints, but after three requests he reveals she already owes him sixty cents for chocolates.
Yale researcher Warren Hl Hilditch found 142000 bacteria per bill on 21 notes. Some bills showed as few as 14000 living organisms while others reached 586000, with no clear preference for $1000 over $1 bills. The study oddly hints higher denomination notes may be healthier to carry.
A schoolmaster threatens a punishment then asks a riddle about incubating eggs and hatching. George interrupts with a sharp, practical answer, suggesting he would use a brick and string to drown the master’s cat, reflecting his wary defiance.
A confusing scene unfolds as a man explains his wife remained in a wildcat cage while he took a different animal. The exchange hints at a domestic dispute framed by the unusual setting of the wildcat enclosure. Local observers discuss the odd incident and its implications.
A New York voice attacks bird feather use for hats with a quip about birds being plucked alive. The piece chides fashion cruelty and pivots to a wry jab about husbands and villains versus heroes.
A satirical piece mocks old fashioned remedies for cholera. It lists agate pockets and hyacinths as cures, praises a dead child's bone in the pocket, and suggests moon-based theories with Laurel decoctions when Mars or Mercury rises. It ends with skepticism about the moon.
A frazzled Pillsey reacts to being called a born idiot by a fellow. The offender shifts blame to Pillsey's ancestors, prompting a sharp, humorous defense about family lineage and pride. The exchange blends sarcasm with light social sharpness in a quick, characterful moment.
An exchange questions why showgirls look down on chorus girls citing height as a factor. The page also promotes Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup for teething children, claiming gum relief reduced inflammation calmed pain and eased wind colic at 3d per bottle.
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