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This newspaper page contains 38 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Choteau Acantha
Location
Choteau, Montana, United States of America
Date
May 03, 1906
Page
2
A jumble of short items discusses water consumption, Boni family roots, dresses and dressmakers, a $40,000 yearly settlement, Sardou’s Spiritualism, a Parisian shock, a New York fish digestion finding, a church bell theft, Japan’s $80 million war effort, and John L. Sullivan being knocked out by a judge in Cleveland.
Anna Gould's divorce triggers her return to the country and prompts reunions at the dock where bands are not obliged to play "My Boni Vies over the ocean."
A New York physician, in a public address, asserts that women are smarter than men, challenging traditional gender stereotypes and sparking discussion on women’s abilities and rights.
A Chicago professor claims cold weather pushes men toward drinking and that summer heat later provides a similar excuse, suggesting weather influences alcohol use.
Henry James compliments the American people for taking care of their teeth. He believes Henry would eventually find some good quality in them.
A Pittsburg man who has lived in the city for over twenty five years avoids sensational coverage, keeping his name from the scandal department of local papers.
Twenty four towers have been ordered for the use of the Maryland senate with twenty seven members. It is suggested that six of the senators are paired for shared use.
As they grow more accustomed to wealth the Pittsburg men will demand a principal rather than chorus girls, signaling a shift in their social ambitions and standards.
A New York parson declares nine of ten fashionable women in the city favor drink too much. He urges the clergymen to influence their social circle before harm deepens.
The note states Turkey has unwarrantedly arrested Americans and readily consented to apologize. It adds no money payment was demanded with the apology.
Professor I S Lee claims candy cures fatigue and urges a pound to combat tiredness. The remark raises questions about his independence and possible ties to candy interests.
Wealthy New Yorkers plan a theater dedicated to high art and consider hiring George Lederer to manage the venture.
The passage questions why two Chicago businessmen would not commit death by their own action until lawyers were present. It ponders whether they sought to persuade St Peter they acted under advice of counsel.
Amateur humorist Ernest Fownes was held in quarantine after officials deemed his joke on them as evidence of lunacy. The incident, described as fitting for Punch, lacks details of the joke.
Two men described as gentleman thieves were arrested in New York after being surprised while leaving apartments they had been burgling. The report suggests that a gentleman thief is essentially a sneak thief.
A man who attempted suicide twice faces sympathy amid turmoil caused by his wife and seven children. He reacts to a cruel taunt the text refers to as a song about labor roles, highlighting the ironies of harsh social pressure.
Russell Sage, the New York financier famed for buying bargains and rebuilding them, aims to live 100 years. He credits temperance, sleep, avoidance of worry, and hard work for success. Sage drives in Central Park, funds church rebuilding, and plans to maintain daily discipline to reach par.
A humorous tale features a cow ready to jump the moon who pauses to contemplate carrying a sign on her back. She muses about wearing rubber heels for a progressive ad message, prompting a canine observer's question and a punchline about modern advertising ideas.
In a Boston Transcript note a Mr. Macfarland relays overheard streetcar conversations by two colored women. They share that leaving a husband often stems not from abuse or meanness but a simple loss of taste. A housekeeping member of Congress recalls a colored woman who cannot locate her husband, contrasting rural calm with city life and joking that keeping a husband in the town is a great task.
Ex Governor Murphy from New Jersey visited the Capitol with Rep Wood and Sen Dryden. Kean entered the gallery to greet the Governor. A senator teased Dryden for persuading Murphy on a policy in the Prudential and joked Kean would sell him his copy of Facts and Fancies.
A renowned pianist interrupts a crowded drawing room event and asks for silence to hear himself perform. In the ensuing quiet he breaks three strings and shatters a plate glass window, illustrating the toll of a self focused performance.
Chinese officials debate army uniforms as queues become a flashpoint. The Lian-ping-chu has not allowed full removal of queues despite reports of shortened styles among Pei-yang troops. An Empress Dowager rebuked a proposal, saying wait until she dies before cutting queues.
A famed blindfolded wine taster in a Harper's Weekly anecdote correctly identified 24 wines then mistook the final glass for water. After a puzzled moment he declared it the substance he uses to clean his teeth, revealing the gag under the betting setup and backers’ confidence.
A Scribner's essay proclaims China has ended scams selling defective rifles and worn machinery as modern goods. It warns Western hustlers that the era of bunko in China is finished and urges young Westerners and honest firms to seek opportunity there on fair terms.
A foreign visitor tours the Capitol with an American guide. In the Senate lobby the guide points to portraits of Daniel Webster and Henry Clay. The foreigner admires Webster and asks how Henry Clay’s portrait was obtained, joking about the cigarman likeness.
Senator W A Clark of Montana spoke at a Corcoran Gallery reception unveiling his fifty six artwork collection valued over 700000. He said art attracts him and he would have pursued art as a career if not for wealth. He joked he would have printed lions not sheep or cattle.
The poem urges forgetting praise slander and slights while remembering kindness, praise, and promises kept. It emphasizes grateful debt to those who aid, guiding personal conduct with balance, humility, and generosity in daily life. Catholic Fhorida
A cheeky item traces a neck joke to its origins as a boy seeks compensation after a troublesome prank. The piece notes a timid suitor finds himself in hot water over the incident.
In Chicago two men faced off in a dark alley with revolvers drawn ready to warn each other “money of your life.” They recognize one another and exchange brief remarks. One admits to targeting a cop earlier and says he worked the pocket book game on a man.
A playful exchange between a Gentleman Monk and Lady Giraffe about love and affection. The Monk notes a woman desires to be loved while the Giraffe quips that she often faces resistance, framing the humorous banter as a moral or social joke.
Mrs Ascum jeers at her husband who says he will not work to live by the Bible teaching of contentment. Mrs Jackson notes his claim that the Bible instructs contentment as better than riches, so he remains idle. The exchange appears in the Philadelphia Press.
A depot official shouts at a baggageman after trunks are hurled, warning that the blows create big dents in the concrete platform as travelers stare in astonishment.
In a Cleveland Leader excerpt a timid suitor declares intent to wed the daughter, the father erupts with threats, asking for his cane and then his gun as anger boils over. The scene ends with the suitor retracting the proposal.
An irate customer accuses a seller of selling a fraudulent ice cream freezer. The salesman counters by blaming user error and insisting ice quality is crucial for proper operation.
Mr Naybor questions the number of boys at Prof Bright’s school. The professor explains that last Wednesday the 35 pupils were doubled when they broke into his hothouse and ate many cucumbers.
A bystander scolds violence with the remark you should not hit him when he is down. A boy responds that the struggle to bring him down was hard, and implies restraint from harsh talk.
A cranky diner complains to a cashier that a waiter served him poorly. The cashier retorts that the waiter was referencing the diner's own dissatisfaction policy, highlighting a humorous clash over service standards. The exchange underscores differing perceptions of courtesy and accountability.
Tess suspects a proposed engagement by Tess Brookleigh was a ruse. Jess confirms the man lacked a proper ring, revealing a counterfeit practicality in the scene.
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