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Newspaper
Choteau Acantha
Location
Choteau, Montana, United States of America
Date
Mar 15, 1906
Page
7
Mrs. Egbert Sheldon of Woodville Connecticut recounts a year and a half of facial and body sores terrorizing her infant son. After two months using Cuticura Soap and Ointment the sores vanished and the child recovered fully.
A brief comic vignette shows a man trapped by a car machine with a muffled voice asking for help while another man named Bill backs up the vehicle. The scene highlights a humorous hazard of early automotive handling.
Report by Lothrop and Johnson lists patentees Martin Amundson Ivanhoe Minn lamp burner Martha Davis Worthington Minn fence structure Charles Howards Albert Lea Minn landside wheel George Goman St Paul Minn lifting jack Nels Hegg Harmony Minn horseshoe calk Peter Kones Castlewood S D wrench Erik Kyl lonen Enterprise N B threshing machine detailing the week’s granted patents to Northwest inventors.
A collection of wry Georgia maxims from the Atlanta Constitution notes. The rain falls on the just and unjust, yet the unjust keep boats handy to stay afloat. The world misses a person like a lost star, and only egotists fear grass covering them.
In a London mixed club, four ladies played a rubber. A friend asks about children and replies six above and four below. Another player quips she is chicane, ending a rare moment of humor at the serious bridge table.
A dealer touts a new safety razor that allegedly drives customers back to regular shops. He claims barbers will be well paid for introducing the device. The exchange highlights confidence in the product’s market impact.
A German descent reader writes of coffee’s harm and a switch to Postum Food Coffee. After stopping coffee the patient reports relief from nervousness heart trouble and asthma and credits Postum with restoring health. The notice promotes Postum and references The Road to Wellville.
B Meinell, a British sailor aboard the Brenda, leapt overboard as the ship cleared Honolulu harbor to avoid abuse and possible brig confinement. He was manacled and heavily clad, but a French whaleboat crew rescued him after spotting him amid saltwater. He reached Sorenson Wharf, was processed by police, then returned to the Brenda amid unclear details of escape from the brig.
A biographical sketch recalls John Gillespie once called the king of lock-pickers. He faced execution at Wigan but survived due to soapsuds and repeatedly escaped prison. He robbed guards and governors before eventual conversion and death in Carlisle workhouse.
Douglas Wilson of Berlin New Hampshire once famed for hunting tells a wry tale of stalking a woodchuck at its hole. He claims to have closed in to fire and wound the animal but says a backshot pellet struck him as he grabbed the woodchuck.
A fragmentary poem excerpt by Frank L. Stanten recalls light amid sorrow and storm. The speaker hears a singer whose hopeful melody steadies a weary world as bells ring and a guiding light persists beyond darkness.
An advertisement claims winter weakness stems from low oxygen and blood impurities. It praises Dr Williams Pink Pills as a purifying tonic that strengthens the blood and improves sleep appetite and color, citing a Detroit testimonial of rapid improvement after six boxes.
The fork's name traces to Latin forca meaning a yoke, an inverted V. It passes through Italian forca and forchetta, yielding the French fourchette and the English fork retaining the harder sound from the original term.
A playwright asks whom to cast as the Human Ostrich in Birds of a Feather. The stake manager endorses Dolly Dimple as a hit and notes she can kick harder than anyone else in the company.
Jorkins and Morkins clash over a possible forged check. Jorkins asserts no man could forge his name and cash the check, while Morkins questions the peculiarity of the signature. Jorkins admits he has no money in the bank.
A dialogue frames ambition with a spoof of wealth as a man boasts a multimodal handbag weapon. The exchange hints at crime and futuristic gadgets, including a pistol attachment and police wireless link, set against Detroit’s urban backdrop.
A Puck cartoon contrasts British and American views on life and sport with a quip about whether American life is cheap, highlighting the era’s attitude toward athletic culture and national character.
The ad promotes Dr. Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery as a forest plant based tonic to purify blood and restore stomach liver and kidneys. It claims to ease indigestion biliousness headaches and constipation while noting it contains no alcohol and lists plain English ingredients. Also endorses Dr. Pierce’s Pleasant Pellets for constipation.
A brief dialogue shows a man seeking a vow to abstain from alcohol while a woman counters that she prefers the man maintain the pledge rather than outright promise. The exchange hints at relationship tension over self restraint.
In a brisk general observation, workers adapt their tool handling without mittens to retain grip, while a house cat in gloves fails to catch mice. The note highlights practical challenges of warmth versus dexterity in cold environments.
The article notes a seven year surge in crop returns in the Canadian West, especially Alberta and Saskatchewan since 1905. It details rising acres sown and yields for wheat oats and barley, with record bushel totals from 1898 to 1904 and claims the west now offers unparalleled opportunity for settlers and agriculture.
A Georgia man charged with bigamy tells the judge he has more than one wife, explaining some are in Alabama, some in Tennessee, and only one in Georgia where he lives. He says the scatter is to keep peace.
Mrs Talkwords Henry accuses Henry of talking in his sleep during breakfast and he apologizes for interrupting. The exchange centers on a domestic moment with light humor and a shy admission. The dialogue hints at shared familiarity and affection within the household.
An old ad touts Allen's Foot-Ease powder to cure painful smarting feet and ingrown nails. Claims include relief for sweating feet and easier shoe wear. Sold by druggists for 25 cents with a trial package free by mail from A. S. Olmsted in Le Roy New York.
A light exchange contrasts thoughtfulness and wit across two days. One speaker praises the other's consideration, and the other compliments the cleverness shown yesterday.
Advertises PAZO OINTMENT promising relief for piles with bundles for weeding protruding piles and money refund if not cured in 6 to 14 days. States price 50 cents.
A fragmented line appears to discuss an English humorist and a claim that life is not held, with a remark that no true sportsman ever stops in America, reflecting a quip-like tone.
A judge notes Elsie Davis as the best pianist in our smart set praising her skillful pedaling. The remark adds a quip that her grandfather was a peddler and that her talent may remind some of that fact.
A humorous exchange unfolds as a druggist debates Maw trying a porous plaster for a week and asks if a failed trial should be exchanged for a toothbrush, highlighting light domestic retail banter.
A light woman is said to be causing trouble as the fortune teller in the scene notes a blonde cook. The exchange focuses on a humorous or sharp remark about the cook's appearance and its link to ongoing hassles.
A job applicant boasts a wide acquaintance by naming the secretary of war, Mr. Taft, as a contact. The exchange frames a request for a man with broad connections for a managerial post.
A fragment suggests a discussion about Steincohn and wealth as a fire is reported as discovered soon, with Bergold questioning the trouble and the fire’s origin remains unclear.
An 19th century advertising note touts Mother Gray’s Sweet Powders for Children used by a nurse at a New York Children's Home. Claims cure feverishness headache stomach troubles teething disorders and worm destruction. Sample mailed free from Allen S. Olmsted Le Roy New York.
Tourist jokes about the climate as a local notes a new word and asks for it to be written down. The native responds with a humorous aside and a colorful exchange about weather in a small town.
An advertising notice from John A. Salter Seed Co of La Crosse Wisconsin promotes Salzer's Bangain Seed Book and a special catalog of bargain seeds. It claims enormous crops from Northern Grown Pedigree Seeds and offers a free seed package to grow five tons of grass, plus Cosmos flowers upon remittance.
A brief dialogue shows Bridget telling her mother her sick sister is well enough to sit up and give notice, followed by a proverb about anger revealing foolishness.
A letter extols Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound as a tonic for women with fatigue headaches backache and weakness. It urges women to seek Mrs Pinkham's free advice in Lynn Massachusetts and claims the remedy restores health vitality and happiness.
A witty editorial exchange notes that a fair plaintiff’s face wore so much powder the blush had to creep to avoid raising dust, revealing a playful take on courtroom color and vanity.
An early 20th century advertisement for Mrs Winslow’s Soothing Syrup claims to ease teething pain for children by softening gums reducing inflammation and curing wind colic. The ad mentions a small bottle suitable for infants.
Unknown historical quotation urges prudent disposal of surplus goods. The fragment references buying unnecessary items and a warning that one will later sell their belongings. The source context and attributions remain unclear.
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