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This newspaper page contains 22 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Choteau Acantha
Location
Choteau, Montana, United States of America
Date
Apr 13, 1911
Page
6
An advertisement by Dr. A. E. Robinson offers a free home remedy for weak kidneys and bladder pain. It claims rapid recovery from burning, dribbling, backache, and related symptoms and urges readers to request a copy by mail at a Detroit address.
A passerby recalls a pianist who plays with his toes and jokes about a curious 18 month old prodigy capable of similar feats, suggesting remarkable dexterity in a casual chat.
A Whitney Nebraska woman reports relief from kidney complaints after four boxes of Doan’s Kidney Pills. She describes nighttime urgency swelling ankles and burning on urination, and says she was entirely cured. Foster Milburn Co. Buffalo New York markets the remedy for 50 cents per box.
A rancher from Ill Top Douglas County Colorado submits an endorsement for Rough on Rats detailing decades of prairie dog troubles and success with poisoned wheat and corn mixtures. The advertisement promotes the product for prairie dogs squirrels mice and other pests with directions and pricing 25c and 75c sizes.
A quirky quote exchange about a life term says he received 99 years instead of life. The item also touts cures and health remedies with several advertising lines for piles and blood purifier Garfield Tea and Sterne’s reflective line.
A longtime fear of a great New York disaster rests on the Jersey flats where barges hold over 600000 pounds of high explosives. The stock moves daily along railroads, with 500000000 pounds produced yearly and 5 000 carloads in transit, threatening a catastrophe within a 20 mile radius of the city.
Lawrence Kelly, 78, famed as Puget Sound’s shrewdest opium smuggler, freed after four terms at McNeil Island. Broken in body and spirit, he may end his days in a poorhouse unless accomplices aid him with part of his fortune. He never confessed and sailed alone, having evaded customs for years.
Milwaukee plans for public merriment face a deficit of about 3000 dollars after four city dances drew 3000 attendees. Mayor Emil Seidel and Victor Berger push new plans including penny admission moving picture shows in congested districts to sustain public entertainment.
James H. Pearson, itinerant preacher released from the city hospital observation ward, designs two aeroplane models to carry missionaries. He plans to fly over the world after first cleansing St. Louis, aims to spread evangelism rather than militarism, and preaches nightly in the streets as a member of the Amateur Aeronaut Association of St. Louis.
West reports show varied conditions yet generally strong crops across Alberta Saskatchewan and Manitoba. Farmers like Castor Delisle Bon Accord and Regina record high per acre yields from 18 to 44 bushels with many exceeding 30 bushels per acre. Local agents note widespread strong wheat oats and barley outputs across many counties and towns.
Capt. George A. Briggs recalls a west Africa incident where a chimp named John, owned by a high official, roamed freely causing a scene as he stole dainties from a vendor. The crowd demanded a court appearance. the owner presented witnesses and John pleaded guilty. The court sentenced the chimp to three months confinement.
Alfred Gwynne Vanderbilt recalls at a New York Yacht Club luncheon how a wealthy Bostonian visiting with a large retinue overtaxed his accommodations. At dessert he joked that the guest’s undergardener might be ill, prompting puzzled questions before the punchline lands.
The retiring J. P. Morgan & Co. partner George W. Perkins urges young men to avoid overreaching when seeking jobs. He counsels promising too little rather than too much, citing a humorous exchange with a New York artist and a flexible model as a cautionary anecdote.
The British navy announces teetotal operation on two cruisers Rainbow and Niobe. Sailors will no longer receive alcohol allowances, a dramatic shift from the old daily ration of ale and rum. The change marks an unprecedented move in naval tradition dating back to 1830.
An agitated friend questions a man selling a gold brick to Farmer Corntessel. The farmer replies that the seller’s aim was to learn how the process works, and the friend admits curiosity about trying the business.
A quip about a young man found asleep in a parlor with cobwebs as a father jokes he is waiting for his daughter to dress. The lines reveal a playful, domestic moment and a humorous family dynamic.
Ex Governor Heard backed hardy Alfalfa Clover and Salter Seed Co. of La Crosse Wisconsin promotes economical seed packets including Alfalfa Clover Billian Grase the 10 Ton wonder Silver King Barley Bonanza Oats and more. Send 10 cents for a packet list and 25 cents for a large seed catalog.
A column-like remark recalls Mrs. Benham urging health as wealth and pokes fun at a doctor offering rapid wealth schemes. The piece uses humorous, social shorthand to critique wellness fads and medical pitches.
If It's Your Eye Use Pettit's Eye Salve for inflammation itching lids eye aches defects of vision and sensitivity to strong fights. All druggists or Ho Bros Buffalo N Y.
A short note asserts that no matter the loss, there are equally worthy suitors or opportunities. The line suggests persistence in pursuing options despite a setback.
A terse note reflects a friend who quit college and now faces debt. The line suggests disappointment in choosing a path deemed unprofitable. No further details are provided about the person or circumstances.
Mrs Ollie Oodall of Morton's Gap Kentucky reports two years of severe backache and female disorders improved after using Lydia E Pinkham's Vegetable Compound and Liver Pills. She now does all chores and has no pain. The ad promotes contacting Mrs Pinkham for confidential advice.
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