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This newspaper page contains 32 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Chariton Patriot
Location
Chariton, Iowa, United States of America
Date
Jun 14, 1900
Page
3
A Pittsburg man visiting Detroit recounts asking directions to a barber shop in Algiers style talk. After failed attempts with French and English speakers, he pantomimed a shave and learned a barber would guide him to a shop, avoiding a deadly misstep.
A young man in a department store compliments the shop and asks what they sell. The clerk replies Everything, prompting a request to see family ties. She returns with family jars, and the man declines, deeming them undesirable.
A courtroom exchange questions a plaintiff's sanity as a witness testifies a man asserts he is the prophet Mohammed. The attorney mocks the idea, and the witness admits he is the prophet Mohammed himself, ending the exchange with a witty remark from London Answers.
A Chicago News quip frames a fundraiser supper as a costly snack, noting a burned ball of popcorn cost 50 cents versus expected cheap peanuts. The exchange contrasts perceptions of the event as a circus with a plain charitable purpose.
London Telegraph quote recalls a poet asking if readers will miss him and an editor’s grim reply about trust with a gun. The fragment reads as literary witticism about fame, memory, and violence.
Cambridge students gathered in relief bonfire action for Ladysmith using signs shutters and town furniture. Several were arrested and convicted of theft, fined heavily by the mayor, and now barred from church law and many professions. The mayor refuses to lift sentences.
A Philadelphia Record item recalls a stockbroker noting a waiter who spoke with a Pennsylvania Dutch-inflected English and a man of color born near Reading who grew up among whites. It also tells of a German self-learner in a Wisconsin lumber camp who adopted an Irish brogue, then returned to Chicago with lingering accents.
In 1870 Comstock and White quarrelled at Fort Wallace. Comstock killed White and was jailed before Judge Joyce at Hays City. Comstock admitted guilt, claiming lack of evidence, provoking shock at the courtroom scene and prompting reactions from White’s New York brother.
The Cleveland Plain Dealer notes assertions from observers who lived among Russians about the peasant class. It describes near starvation, improvidence, ignorance, superstition, distrust of reform, and heavy drinking. Middle class is scarce. shops levy high charges. foreigners own manufacturers and much of the trade. education may ease the dullness but centuries of serfdom pose deep evils.
In a joking dialogue, Mr Hubbub notes tribes that cannot wear clothes cause sickness, while Mrs Hubbub counters that similar patterns occur in civilized lands. She mentions Mrs Poindexter buying outfits monthly, contrasting comfort with spending, ending with Mrs Hubbub crying.
A mother accuses her son Johnny of taking preserves from the pantry and demands the truth. Johnny replies with the maxim that children should be seen and not heard as a moment of quiet defiance in a Catholic Standard and Times context.
Baltimore News notes that the topic of Mary Ann or her equivalent is taboo among Japanese women. They avoid discussing servants as it would be seen as a breach of good breeding, though they may discuss dress theater music and other topics.
Pawtucket correspondent tells of a man who hurried to catch a car with a loaf in hand. The bakery string attached to the loaf unwound along the street as he rode, and he followed the winding cord back to the bakery to return the ball of twine intact.
Roosevelt defends Cromwell by noting Puritan combat, but condemns Drogheda and Wexford massacres as brutal stains. He argues Cromwell won through battlefield ferocity and leadership, not merciless postwar vengeance, while absolving no guilt for Irish atrocities.
A rustic fails a sight test for railways and laments politeness cost him the chance. He recounts a father pressuring him to say a color, fearing offense, while the rustic admits he could see red but chose to agree. The episode ends with him being rejected for politeness.
A humorous brag from a downtrodden woman who plans to marry a younger man for money. She declares she is engaged to Billy Jones to save on rent, noting the age gap and motives with a blunt, ironic tone. The anecdote highlights social attitudes and humor from the era.
A crotchety judge demands direct testimony and no hearsay. The witness Mary Jones provides her name but refuses to answer her age, saying she only has hearsay evidence on that point.
A curatorium based in St. Petersburg distributes compassion and free eye treatment and advice to peasant communities nationwide, aiding those suffering from eye ailments.
In Colonel Albert S. Evans's sketches a Yankee bear hunter in Santa Barbara tries lassoing a grizzly. The bear takes the rope, pulls the hunter toward him, and the man abandons his horse as he flees to a tree. Two helpers would fare differently. one man and one bear face a tougher outcome.
A minister recalls a college summer supply duty in a Methodist church. A visiting pastor in a Presbyterian village tested him with a chapter of unpronounceable Names from Numbers. The novice read the following chapter, prompting a silent, mutual wink.
The passage quotes Gregory in The Atlantic on the fast lunch habit. A sharp, socio humorous note depicts a man dashing into a quick lunch place, ordering before removing coat, eating swiftly, tossing bread and slaw, finishing cake in quarters, paying at the desk, and rushing to catch a trolley, all in quick succession.
An old man explains betting ten dollars on the spelling of proper after a dispute on a Baltimore train. He claimed propper with two ps and won the wager, then donated the money to charity. He later checked dictionaries and admitted he bluffed the other man out of his money.
A dying man asks his companion not to mourn him and to keep happiness in view as he dies. She sobs and resists, insisting black is becoming, while the text notes consoling sentiment can worsen grief and blur the path forward. An Atchison Globe clipping reflects on consolation in affliction.
The Omaha World-Herald argues the practice of awarding contracts to the next to the lowest bidder prevents recurring bidding mistakes. It notes many low bids stem from miscalculations and that continuing underbids harms both the builder and the trade, urging awarding to the second lowest bidder as a prudent general rule.
An old Niagara steamer pilot tells a conundrum about the Maid of the Mist while a bazaar tale recalls a wealthy donor sending beef and ox tongues to a charity stall. A London Standard account notes the net gain to Mr X was one ox tongue and a cheap charity reputation.
The Western Union Telegraph cable under Lake Champlain links Ticonderoga to Larrabees Point. Originating in Europe, it first connected the Red Sea shores, then Hilton Head to Tybee Island near Beaufort. After the Civil War it was moved to New York City and stored before being placed at its current site.
A Chicago Post quote captures an author crediting his wife as the source of his inspiration. When asked what fuels creativity he explains that his wife’s requests for a new gown and more household money push him to renewed effort and keep Pegasus in a gallop.
A crafty politician insists to a reporter that the woman he spoke with was not his wife and that the woman the committee spokesman said refused to talk was someone else. The exchange highlights political maneuvering and misdirection as details remain murky.
A humorous exchange warns a husband to return home more often. The wife quips that if Abel’s fate was a club, the husband’s club might be the death of him. The line blends wit with a domestic caution.
A lone traveler finds a man tied to a tree after bushrangers robbed him in a remote grove. The victim says the bandits took all but a bundle of notes in his breast pocket, and one robber who remained behind untied him slightly to slip away with the hidden money. London Answers.
LA FERME 21944 is a well bred brown standardbred stallion standing 16 hands, weighing about 1200 pounds. Sired by Garnet Wilkes, with lineage including Marion Wilkes and Duroe Wilkes, 2:30 list relations, and Daisy Wil son as 1stdam. Claims fastest double gait in Lucas county. terms: $10 to insure more in foal.
Describes the French imported draft stallion SEDUCTEUR from Calvados weighing over 2000 pounds, praised as top blood stock. Notes premiums at Wayne County Fair, breeding details, sire lines, and terms for foal insurance. Also advertises two young breeding jacks. James A. McMurry owner and keeper. season 1900 at Lucas County Fair Grounds.
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