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Newspaper
Carthage Record
Location
Carthage, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Mar 09, 1900
Page
7
A collage of comic quips and exchanges from era newspapers. Punchy lines touch on Master and Page banter, race remarks, witty misfires, domestic moments, and social embarrassments. Notable bits include Ally Sloper quips, a color line joke, and light flirtations around engagements and marriage.
The Lady Warwick Hostel in Reading offers education for women in lighter agricultural work with courses in poultry bee keeping dairy gardening and rural industries. American women plan to attend with facilities for 43 regular students and a model garden several recent buildings plus a thatched potting shed carpentry training and an expanding market for poultry eggs honey and vegetables.
Much discussion arises over the alarming increase of peasy. The article cites the rate of living and rush for money as causes. It recommends Hostetter's Stomach Bitters as the best way to preserve health and prevent nervous breakdown, claiming it cures stomach ills, constipation, dyspepsia and biliousness.
A sequence of humorous lines on courtship cooking and manners ends with a note that the Indianapolis Journal printed the piece. The remarks joke about love, success, blues, self-control, and education in a light, folksy tone.
One hundred dollars reward offered for any catarrh cured by Hall's Catarrh Cure. F J Cheney & Co of Toledo supply the remedy priced at 75 cents per bottle. Local druggists sell it with testimonials free. Endorsers West Truax Walding Kinnan Marvin vouched for Cheney's honesty. Hall's Family Pills also advertised.
Tharie Rose eight and Elsie seven discuss the world’s origin. Tharie claims Adam was lonely and God made a woman from his side, prompting playful astonishment as Marie Rose jokes that Adam would be tickled to death. The dialogue echoes a child’s vivid, humorous grasp of biblical story.
A dissected United States map puzzle from the Chicago Great Western Railway invites readers to assemble the map printed on heavy cardboard. It poses geography questions and promises an instructive activity for all ages, available by sending 10 cents to F. H. Lord in Chicago with labeled envelope for the Puzzle Department.
An Atchison man endures a lifetime of henpecking from his wife and five daughters. He has been forced to take homeopathic pills against his will while preferring quinine, revealing a domestic dispute framed as a stubborn household quarrel.
The John A. Salzer Seed Co of La Crosse Wisconsin reported 6434 orders on February 26, a figure they expect to double by mid March. The company lists strong demand for Rotespeitz Bromus Inermis Rape Big four Oats Three Eared Corn and early vegetables including onions cabbage peas and bean seed. Early Bird Radish and Lightning Cab age are noted as top sellers. A Rottingdean dinner anecdote mentions sugar and sumac pronunciation. The International and Great Northern Railway is distributing a large scale Texas and Mexico map, with D J Price of Palestine Texas offering copies for seven cents in stamps.
A Fortnightly tea meeting of a D A R chapter featured Prof. Sparks from the university presenting a paper on Governeur Morris, noted as a financier behind the American Revolution. Attendees debated Morris’s influence and the political borrowing that funded the colonial cause.
In Pittsburgh a well known professor known for affable temper tries to switch cars on a suburban trolley trip. A conductor blocks the transfer sparking a brief exchange. The professor signals a friend to proceed, then clarifies he can change cars at the station, prompting no further action.
A former commodore-captain on a trans Atlantic liner, usually friendly to passengers, loses temper on deck. A lady asks about pleasant weather and receives a curt reply that he does not know and tells her to ask the cook. She apologizes, thinking she was addressing the cook. The anecdote is from Collier's Weekly.
An incident near Chicago Evening News reports a trainboy dropping a baggage car minutes ago. Onlookers say a fellow may see risk and worry, while the trainboy clutched cigars in his mouth during the event.
A brief notice reports that the Missouri Pacific Railway Mountain Route are now shifting operations or undergoing changes. Details remain sparse in the fragment, but the item identifies the Mountain Route as active with unspecified adjustments affecting service or routing.
In Stray Stories Ciara asks what Mr Cummings said last night about a man giving up business. He replied that any man who made it would not stay in the old life. Ciara retorts to waste no more time and follow her advice.
Promotes a John A Salzer Seed Co catalog from Crosse Wisconsin claiming seeds like Bromus and Speltz yield high profits for farmers. Offers 10c postage for the catalog and 10 rare samples of farm largest vegetable seeds. Includes a short Harlem Life quotation about family wealth and risk.
An assorted OCR fragment lists offers for a free Allen's Foot-Ease sample from Olmsted New York, plus various ad lines and promotional quotes. It includes claims about cures, a war balloon note, cold cures, and testimonial fragments from daily papers, with several unrelated product mentions and misread names.
A claimant describes nine years of head catarrh. After 18 weeks on Peruna the cure is complete and lasting two and a half years. The ad promotes Peruna as the universal safeguard and urges families to obtain Dr Hartman’s free book on winter catarrh from Columbus Ohio.
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