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Newspaper
Big Timber Pioneer
Location
Big Timber, Montana, United States of America
Date
Sep 11, 1902
Page
6
A string of satirical items touches politics, technology, crime, and society. Notes mention King Edward, wireless politics, Berlin and Rome connections, Johnstown horrors, coal prices, train robbers, a St. Joseph mystery, a family surviving on four dollars weekly, Venezuelan armies, Lawton Oklahoma, King Alfonso, beer poisonings in Iowa, Teresa Carreno, the czar and cottonseed oil, sea cook unions, and European nations pleading for Morgan loans.
A fragment reflects on financial ease for a young couple on ten dollars a week and a minister’s controversial plan to steer the nation toward Confucian ideals. It mentions wealthy parents and a nostalgic line about swimming holes and summer afternoons.
A famed American beauty identified as the prettiest by Thackeray has died. The note recalls that Thackeray never met the women pictured in corset advertisements.
An Oklahoma editor fired six shots at a man who refused to pay four dollars due on his subscription. The remark about needing an expert to hit such a small amount underscores the confrontation.
A quip about surname distribution notes Sullivan as Boston’s most common name and the Johnsons as Chicago’s most numerous. The question asks how many Sullivans were aboard the Mayflower, implying a genealogical or historical count.
A Pennsylvanian is said to have eloped with his mother in law. When the truth of the affair comes out, it will probably be learned that he was kidnaped.
The Vanderbilt heiress married a few days ago and drew wedding presents valued at 1.3 million dollars. The remark notes that it pays to wed into the Vanderbilt family.
A wealthy Chicago resident petitioned to raise his property value by 225000, challenging critics who label the city wicked. The move prompts potential scrutiny of assessor practices and municipal tax implications.
A descriptive note recounts a horse fleeing restraints imposed by humans, escaping from its bind as cruel neglect interfered with its natural path. The tale frames the escape as poetic justice against man’s inhumanity.
A local tale from Red Oak features an older couple who wed contrary to a younger pair, later regretful, as a caution that parental interference with children's choices complicates family life.
A clerk named Cash absconded with a large sum in New York but was quickly captured. Authorities say a detective called his name and he halted his flight out of habit, ending the pursuit.
King John informs King Edward that if Britannic needs ships, he may send a few hundred warships without materially interrupting the regular business of the C43.
A woolly west society man in a swallowtail coat and pink shirt notes Parisians may attend the opera in straw hats and dress suits, a surprising style shift that astonishes observers.
A light overcoat owner E Wilbert Marsh forgets a letter while rushing to a ball game. He bets on the Chicago team with a stranger, loses, and pawns the coat. A rival reads a letter to uncover Ollie and Sam Niebaum’s hidden theater plan, while Fred Crombie is left behind.
A man named E Wilbert Marsh visits the bleachers with ransom money for an overcoat. He discovers the exact amount in the coat pocket later along with six cigars, while forgetting a letter he should have mailed. He reflects that the world seems better, and the missing letter remains forgotten.
A newspaper man learns a stylographic pen is simple, but the owner calls it a Chinese puzzle. A Chinese townsperson, who bought one months earlier, dismantles and reassembles the device in minutes, proving deft handling surpasses the maker. The tale contrasts quick Chinese skill with Irish or American clumsiness.
A Philadelphia politician recounts a story from Harrisburg about his young daughter’s firm belief in his abilities. She confides that the moon is broken and only a small piece remains, then reassures herself that her father will mend it when he returns home.
A young Cincinnati man, married into wealth, lives in his father in law's house rent free. He explains to a friend that the house truly belongs to him as an inheritance and he would owe taxes if he accepted ownership now.
A London Graphic correspondent describes pilgrims to Valle di Pompeii where the Madonna is famed for miracles. Contadini travel on foot or in carts drawn by white oxen, singing with tammourines and pipes as girls with hair down seek intercession for the sick from the Madonna di Pampeii.
A narrator warns that lack of concern among family members invites harm from others. The passage urges vigilance to protect relatives and prevent abuse or injury from outsiders taking advantage of indifference.
In a Chicago News piece a leather merchant debunks a tall fish tale about catching thirty two fish. He recounts his own failed attempt, then reveals Simpson’s string of seventeen rock bass four herrings seven sunfish two perch a bullhead and a shiner were kept alive to prove the catch as described.
A reflective piece notes that characters and conduct matter as much as affiliations, warning that partnership can reveal hidden risks and cost to a company. It argues cautious association and scrutiny of collaborators to avoid reputational harm.
A music publisher recounts the composition of The Flag of the Free by Harrison Millard, a Massachusetts Civil War colonel who after duty wrote popular tunes. Lincoln admired the piece when Millard’s regimental band played for the president and his son asked about the tune on the White House steps. Millard later died in New York, unrecognized, having held a customs job, with his enduring song remembered.
A tale from Sir W. G. Simpson traces golf origins to shepherds on St Andrews links. Two men practice putting with round stones in rabbit scrapes, grow to play from distance, then nail circular holes and mark them with wool flags. The story notes the game’s essentials have changed little.
A civil service commission file in Washington reveals a fond farewell note to Idaho Governor praising his character and service. The correspondence compares him to a noble knight and remarks on his guidance as he nears the end of his earthly term.
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