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This newspaper page contains 31 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Bedford Free Press
Location
Bedford, Iowa, United States of America
Date
May 27, 1909
Page
12
A clergyman claims a trick to make fortune with a $100 bill and a pad but stresses only those who know the game can profit. Access to boardroom confidence, dividend timings, and advance stock moves define the rare knowledge. The piece warns ordinary speculators face peril in Wall Street.
Kansas City Times reports soldiers of Battery B Second United States artillery loading 18 mule cars in 25 minutes, a new loading dock record. Themen discuss mule handling, noting mules respond to names and are driven forward by disciplined crews, comparing them favorably to horses.
A brief fable about a baby lark asking its mother to teach it to fly. The mother recalls her own uncertain beginnings, rain gluing the wings, and a sudden lift as the sun returns. The bird glows with gratitude as it learns to fly.
A brief, quirky guide explains making a simple eye illusion from a Pasteboard tube to appear as if looking through the left hand. By aligning a cut piece around the eye and using both eyes, objects beyond the hand vanish, creating the impression the right eye sees through the palm.
A country lad, amid a British soldiers encampment, held the head of a donkey while a cart loaded with turf was brought in. As a band played, onlookers mocked him until he declared he feared the donkey would enlist, delivering a sharp, humorous retort.
A fragmented reminiscence recalls a well stocked summer scene as a New York author visits a Maine village cottage. A man calls with an iron load of vegetables and questions stock kept on the farm, listing cows a bull two yokes of oxen and horses, with central shares noted.
A hardware dealer recalls a prim old lady entering the shop to buy a carpet sweeper. She asks to see both kinds, the dealer retrieves them from the rear, a lawn mower on the wall causes them to shift. The mower rattles loudly and the woman exclaims the noise is worse than her old one and leaves, leaving the dealer pondering the joke.
A Steam Roll era player from Benjamin Franklin school suffered a fractured collar bone in a hard fought game against Avalanches of George Washington. The injury appeared after the match when the player recalled tackling Skinny Morgan and hearing a crack. The father and a surgeon diagnosed the fracture as the boy felt neck soreness.
A humorous school anecdote from a misbehaving class recalls Tom bringing home a progress slip. His mother, a former teacher, is pleased by high marks while his lawyer father notes the absence of deportment. The boy explains that the term refers to a missing “three our room.”
Sir Charles Wyndham recounted a tale of a young man who pursued a lady against her father’s will. The father warned him off, but the suitor returned the next day. After a five week absence he reappeared and the father asked if he came to see the daughter. He replied he came on behalf of the president of their football club.
A Berlin art student writes to a Bohemian brewing company offering paintings suitable for advertising. He cites Sir John Millais's 40,000 mark soap advertisement as precedent and jokes about underbidding, saying he will accept less than 40,000 marks for his best work.
Tommy asks why a scythe appears in Father Time imagery. Toddles Sr explains it signifies life's brevity as Time cuts people down. The boy shifts topic to bedtime as his father tells him to go tell his mother it’s time for bed.
A traveler disputes rail electrification with an editor at the Cleveland Plain Dealer. He warns steel ties could carry currents and force actors like Hamlet or Lear to dance on charged rails. The editor coolly answers, inviting them to test the claim.
A humorous wedding account unfolds with vibrant dialect as the bride glides to the aisle amid flower girls and elegant kin. Parson Bagster faces questions of who gives her away, Snoot Judson’s defiant exit, and the groom described as the conventional black, provoking mixed praise and wry amusement.
The text notes a legendary Greek word starting lepadotema, said to span 78 syllables and 170 letters, found in Liddell and Scott. Invented by Aristophanes for rhythm in a play, it lists many fish and meats to describe a dish, with the English renderings likened to hash.
An Atlanta Constitution note quotes a Billville teacher arguing Horace wrote poems about wine. The citizen questions the poet’s origin and criticizes spending words on wine while corn supplies are ample, urging restraint in northern Georgia. The speaker blames a vigilant government for the fuss.
Evelyn Ethel writes that a Florida blizzard has hit their area with unusual snowfall. Loraine notes the event is unique as residents wade through snow up to their ankles for most of a day.
In this Chicago Tribune snippet, a woman checks a man’s headache with a playful gesture and declares she has charmed it away, affectionately calling him Arthur and herself witch Hazel. The dialogue showcases light theatrical banter and intimate restoration of comfort.
A brief exchange about retaining a cook through a suitor engagement ring and its implied requirement for return. Read as a fragment from a 19th or early 20th century periodical.
A brief comic exchange shows Grace asking about a man everyone quarrels with and Jack replying that he is the scorekeeper who refuses to relinquish the tally, in Bohemian Magazine style.
A farmer and his wife quarrel over a pig snatching her spring bonnet. The wife scolds and the farmer jokes the animal mistook the bonnet for food, remarking at the humor of the pig in his companion’s poke.
W H Edwards, New York city street cleaning chief, cites plain everyday American hustle over college learning in handling snow. An interviewer asks about education, he downplays calculus and gnomiec aorist, stressing practical, local wisdom and common sense in public service. He tells a joke about marriage age and aging as a reflection on ongoing domestic duties.
Laura and Mr Ferguson discuss a dramatic train wreck witnessed near a fashionable restaurant where a society woman allegedly stepped on a match starting a fierce blaze. George helped extinguish the fire after the crash.
Cartoon caption style item notes a man laments rising gas bills while his wife waits up for him, with a quip implying financial strain and domestic tension in a Chicago Tribune cartoon caption flagged as light humor.
A young woman protests a kiss and, after the man cites the flat's rule about noise after 10 PM, she relents. The exchange turns on social norms and playful tension within a shared living space.
A Chicago Tribune rhyme describes Mary and her goat causing mischief as the sexton and local boys clash. The goat follows Mary everywhere even to church, where a fight erupts with the sexton pouncing and being rammed. The narrator says the sexton started it by butting first.
Dramatic courtroom exchange notes a man claiming he merely tried to steer the trolley to avoid a pedestrian, insisting his prior experience as a chauffeur shaped his reflexes. The witty Puck quotation frames a legal clash over responsibility and intent.
Dr. Horace Bushnell contrasts happiness as outward fortune like money, fashion, status, and public benefits with joy as inward quality of the soul. He defines happiness as what befalls one from without and joy as a spring of character arising within.
A playful dialogue unfolds as Miss Giggles claims Mr Slathers is a lady killer, and he responds with mock modesty and a grand bow, insisting the impression is an injustice and that he only catches them alive. The banter highlights flirtatious social atmosphere in a bygone era.
In Brooklyn an elevator car on the elevated line near Greenwood cemetery erupts in alarm when Joe fixes Jim’s clock for 6:45. The clamor and crowd reaction resemble a panic or circus as a policeman seizes the ticking device dropped from the train.
A Long Island matron decorates a country house with quotations on guest doors to assign rooms. Guests must choose a quotation and sign beneath it, determining their room. One door reads In old friends to be miserly, promoting humor and fellowship, with quotes to be rotated to keep games fair for newcomers.
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