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This newspaper page contains 27 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Austin Daily Herald
Location
Austin, Minnesota, United States of America
Date
Dec 03, 1909
Page
6
The notice advertises city official news for Austin published every afternoon at five except Sundays. It lists subscription rates including four dollars for three months, and single-copy pricing.
Eighteen days of November were cloudy and dimming lights. The December 2 rains coaxed angle worms to surface and many crawled across city sidewalks, drawing local attention to the unusual warm spell.
During the just closed deer hunting season 87 men were killed and 67 injured. The deaths exceed the 1908 total by 20. Seven fatalities occurred in this state, 14 in Michigan and two in Wisconsin.
A seven year old boy avoids a parental scolding by taking a note from his teacher to a local business man who reads it aloud. The boy then leaves scratching his head like a small businessman, leaving the resolution of the mischief unclear.
A child stopped to look at Christmas goods outside a store while two men inside talked. A neighbor faced trouble with his well after rocks were dropped in. a financier offered five five cents for each boy's name. The boy named his friends, all innocent, revealing the real culprit was the money man.
An excerpt from a reading by Archbishop O Connell and read by Mgr Splaine praises liberty with responsibility and authority without despotism. It extols national virtues, justice, charity, and unity, urging all to stand on a platform of Americanism and work for civic purity, education, and religious devotion.
Holmes Hardware Co. offers oxidized silver handled carving sets with stag horn and pearl accents as holiday gifts. Local shoppers can browse a selection of quality cutlery suitable for festive tables and gift giving.
In a blend of fiction and fact the piece cites Herbert Wells on Martians toppled by microscopic foes and notes that tiny organisms and disease germs kill far more than beasts or weapons. It then shifts to a vignette from Woman's Home Companion about a four year old Isabel reciting a Bible verse before seizing the largest cake.
A wry anecdote recalls Ingres needing to attend a funeral to catch a severe cold and Mottez’s joke about visiting the buried to confirm the burial. A Liverpool fire insurance official’s funeral drew many on staff for the same reason, illustrating small, petty motives in art and common life.
A famous MP recalls enduring a persistent bore until he told his secretary the visitor sought the secretary’s post. After revealing the motive, the MP reports no further encounters with the bore. The anecdote appears under London Scraps.
Lord Broughton, famed for a temper, once exploded at a dinner with Thackeray. A guest offered aged madeira, and Broughton snapped back with a sharp rebuke about his age and status, chilling the room and ending the convivial mood.
An elderly spinster overhears a conductor explain a widow is taking her third husband to a crematory. The joke ends with the spinster lamenting her single status while others have husbands to burn.
In Munsey's Magazine C. B. Van Loan hails the baseball umpire as rare, elite, and decisive. He combines keen sight, quick mind, and nerve, issuing appeals in a fraction of a second with no room for review or draw outcomes.
The New York World reports that the piano virtuoso often has unattractive hands despite belief in the artistic hand. Constant practice overdevelops the hand, making fingers blunt and round with cushions of flesh, not tapering as artists expect.
The late General Edward M. McCook in Pike's Peak presided at a dinner for a famed Indian fighter. He praised the colonel's methods then quipped that his only fault was enlisting baldheaded regiments to aggravate the Indians and provoke war.
A cheerful philosopher joked that he thanked God for gout instead of toothache and later thanked Him for not having both pains at once. The remark contrasts bodily afflictions with a light moral tone.
A light hearted duel tale of two Frenchmen and seconds who walk to the chosen spot and trip. One duelist bumps his nose, bleeds a little, and declares his honor vindicated as they shake hands.
Ready Wit recounts famed poet Craig an amusing London figure at cricket grounds. Anecdotes of quick comebacks show his sharp timing with audiences including a rival interrupter and a pub joke. Also a Sydney Smith quip about the historian Grote and his wife highlights culture and wit.
A 1776 style verse riddled with contradictory stances on King George and Congress. It praises royal figures while signaling rebellious undertones, naming Mansfield North Bute and General Washington, amid taunts toward Parliament and Tories. National Magazine.
London Answers explains how searchlights can outshine the moon with mirrors and electric arcs. A 160000 candle power beam raised high yields a beacon rivaling lunar brightness, capable of exposing ships sixty three miles away though it reveals only nearby objects. The beam’s glare unsettles eyes and nerves, demoralizing attackers after repeated exposure.
Deacon Stephen Potter, Utica pioneer known for eccentricity and integrity, testifies in a land dispute near Utica. Asked value of the land he hesitates then declares he would not give a dollar an acre, regardless of his oxen and ice imagery.
The United States flag should have stripes half as wide as the flag’s longest measurement. A navy blue field seven stripes deep should extend two-fifths across the length with forty six stars in six rows starting with eight. Stars spaced so half their width separates adjacent stars. Flags in all sizes may be made with these proportions.
Paris hosts a bourse aux chats where a vast chamber behind a wineshop cages legions of cats of diverse sizes and colors. Buyers include farriers and cooks rather than sentimental old ladies, paying from 20 cents per sleek matou, with fur and flesh repurposed in local eateries. The piece notes vivid scenes of miauls and unusual market motives.
An American traveler mocks a man sitting unmoving on a corner for six months, noting the scene as a humorous pitfall of slang in India. The Chicago Tribune records the quip as a light cultural aside.
A reflective quotation attributed to Irving notes that small minds bend under hardship while great minds elevate beyond adversity. It emphasizes resilience and mental strength as a measure of character.
A 320 acre Dodge County farm near Claremont with stock, outbuildings, and modern facilities. Also listed are 160 acres in Mower County with a large house and outbuildings, plus a two block wide tract in Austin. Seller offers direct deals, no commission, and a selection of farms and city properties with real estate services.
An advertisement urges women with kidney problems to take DeWitts Kidney and Bladder Pills as directed promises good results. It warns against imitations and assures availability through druggists.
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