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This newspaper page contains 13 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Athena Press
Location
Athena, Oregon, United States of America
Date
Apr 23, 1907
Page
3
Wa Mitshell of Martin Georgia writes that his wife dropped from 180 to 68 pounds and appeared near death. After consulting an old physician she started Peruna and gradually improved. She now weighs 100 pounds and can do her own housework and cooking.
Stippler and Dobber discuss a painting titled Calves in a Meadow. Stippler asks about Kuttn admiring the works while Dobber recalls Phat praising the self into the art and questioning if that counts as praise.
Mrs Roma Myers of 180 South Tenth Street Ironton Ohio describes five years of kidney illness. She suffered fatigue, nervousness, sleeplessness and swelling with frequent discharges. After using four boxes of Dean's Kidney Pills the pain bloating and symptoms disappeared and she has remained well. Sold by all dealers 50 cents a box Foster Milburn Co Buffalo NY.
Readable fragments describe two pieces about the Huguenots by public school pupils. One portrays them as French followers linked to Victor Hugo with a conversion tale and an unrhymed poem. The other claims the Huguenots name a steam roller used in India to crush people, describing a dragonlike eyeed machine that snorted steam, then states there are no Huguenots left.
A mixed dialogue features a senator parrying questions on a trusts speech with a witty retort about managing positions. A burglar in a girls college triggers a college yell and a rapid escape. Interspersed lines show courtroom banter, romance chatter, a mock medical ad parody, and a Moses census quip, reflecting a collage of contemporary newspaper humor.
A family lawyer, a friend of the couple, asks the wife for her real reason for wanting a divorce. The wife says the husband isn’t the man she thought she married, while the lawyer notes applying that principle would undermine many homes.
The Scientific American notes Romans used safety pins and collar studs long before modern designs. Ancient pins, often bronze and up to ten inches, matched today’s coil and catch mechanism yet varied in size, sometimes hollow to hold flowers. Pins and studs aided garb fastening, while Romans rolled fabric to conceal items, reflecting early garment innovation.
In 1883 the Prince of Wales supported the College of Music in London by urging a benefit with Sir Henry Irving for the project. A notable performance featuring Robert Macaire drew the royal attendance and over one thousand pounds for the college. Bran Stoker financed expenses, and Irving examined the dramatic class, later receiving thanks from Sir George Grove. A postscript misread as “Mr Edward” caused a humorous mix up surrounding Albert Edward.
A fat Irishwoman squeezes into a crowded street car beside a smartly dressed youth and devours a cheese sandwich with relish. The youth protests with disgust. A quip about a glotterman follows. The text also recalls a history class misreading about Bishop Odo and notes on the Swhety of Assurance for Wh ows and Orphans and early London education.
A witness questions sanity with a humor filled exchange about an inmate claiming to be Santa Claus. The scene shifts to a train joke where a limited runs at unlimited speed, underscoring comic mishaps and foreign travelers in a rowdy boarding car.
An advertisement promises cure for piles including testing, blind, bleeding or protruding types within 6 to 84 days or money back. The page also features a humor fragment about ordinary plane wires, teething remedies for children, and a Zephyr-like exchange with Mr Feathertop and Miss Redpep.
A vintage remedy promotes Brandroth’s Pit Ed pill as a safe laxative. The ad claims one pill nightly relieves constipation and touts long history, sold in drugstores in plain or sugar-coated form.
A gentleman visiting a widow asks for a memento of her late husband. She responds with a sharp quip about a relative named Old Fullerplanks, then adds a local joke about a sixteen inch gun, reflecting a grim humor in the exchange.
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