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Newspaper
Akron Register Tribune
Location
Akron, Iowa, United States of America
Date
Jan 26, 1933
Page
6
A playful, antiquated verse sketches characters at a baseball scene. A boy misreads aims, a new girl asks if spectators are rooting, and a base pair jokes about prayers, costumes, and a long arm reaching for balls. The Tall One longs for knee high pools while others joke about retirement and marriage.
A witty exchange features Professor Mary and a new maid. The maid jokes she thought the rubber plant was waterproof, highlighting humorous misunderstanding in a domestic scene.
A strange bird, about the size of a sparrow and with a tail over 20 inches, was shot in Nagyleaty village. It is identified as a South American finch, with two accompanying birds of its species. How they arrived in Empiry remains a mystery to ornithologists. Pellets advertised in the text describe a laxative and cathartic use, noting impudence in the final line.
Leroy Young of Los Angeles is pictured as a healthy boy now after using California Fig Syrup to treat prior stomach and bowel issues. The ad claims the product, a vegetable laxative, has relieved constipation and biliousness and supports digestion, with four million bottles sold yearly and a note to seek the genuine California label.
Jed Hopkins recounts a visit to Lem Pawley's general store where a customer discovers a gadget in stock while mailing a letter. Lem encourages customers to heft choices, enabling selection of a suitable item. The moral: seeing is believing, and returns are easy with Lem’s courteous service. Published as Jed Hopkins Homely Philosophy by General Mills.
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