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Newspaper
Aberdeen Herald
Location
Aberdeen, Washington, United States of America
Date
Feb 05, 1906
Page
7
A collage of humorous lines from various papers, noting quips about weather, marriages, judges, and social norms. Included are brief jokes about a widow with two million, a stork delivering a brother, and light banter about doctors, fortunes, and manners. The collection spans several voices and era-typical punchlines.
A compact set of satirical quips on gender, marriage, and social norms. Observations touch on winter attire versus summer, a husband who is never henpecked, wives with foreign dukes, and hockey style critiques of football. The notes wrap with a playful banter about dances and social friction.
In the rebate matter the statement suggests that if each railroad acted well none would violate the law. The remark frames a critique of improper rebates and hints at regulatory testing of railroad conduct under legal standards.
A Philadelphia man killed himself after a woman he loved could not prove a long line of illustrious ancestors. The city has reformed politically but clings to the grand father idea.
A Washington Star blurb quotes a cheerful prophet who boasts accurate weather but fails to nail exact dates. The piece then shifts to society gossip about Mrs Biggs and Mrs Diggs, noting multiple marriages and superstition. It mentions Dr Sven Hedin heading to Persia to study Dasht-i Kavir and Dasht-i Lut salt deposits. The irritation over Equitable policyholder influence and graft ends the fragment.
At ninety years old Romee Sage can make 75 000 dollars a day while John D Rockefeller argues that the elderly deserve pensions.
Experience shows humor alone cannot deter women from buying neckties, as the habit persists despite jokes.
An early 20th century advertisement touts Cascarets as a natural cure for constipation and indigestion. It promotes exercise and wood-sawing as cures, claims safety for continuous use, and urges buying genuine Sterling Remedy Company tablets for ten cents per box.
The note describes mixing orange juice pineapple juice and lemon juice with sugar, heating in a double boiler and thickening with cornstarch after scalding. It adds a separate fact about Capt. Stubbs, secretary of the Liverpool Orphan Institution, as one of the few living personas who served on Nelsons flagship Victory.
An 1890s Toledo collaboration includes a notary oath by Frank J. Cheney of F. J. Cheney & Co promising a reward for cures of catarrh with Hall's Catarrh Cure. Additional snippets mention a Lafayette-referenced watch and a remark on wireless telegraph secrecy.
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