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This newspaper page contains 30 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Russell Banner
Location
Russell, Manitoba, Canada
Date
Sep 24, 1908
Page
11
A physiologist encounters a hot sun worker who jokes that he has no brains for taking the job. The Irishman's reply flips the insult, suggesting brains would have kept him from this labor.
An old newspaper blurb touts Mother Graves Worm Exterminator as a pleasant remedy for children and claims it is the best to drive worms from the system.
A Philadelphia Inquirer item notes a humorous lost dog ad found by a wife, offering a large reward for a mangy lapdog named Fido with one eye and no tail, too fat to walk, returned stuffed. The gag contrasts with a serious search.
One hundred dollar reward offered for an uncured catarrh case by Hall's Catarrh Cure. F J Cheney Co of Toledo sells it at 75 cents per bottle with testimonials available. Walding Kinnand Marvin testify to Cheney's honesty and ability to fulfill obligations. Also promotes Hall's Family Pills for constipation.
The Cleveland Plain Dealer quotes Briggs noting his time at home and asks why in a brief aside. He adds a quip that his wife was described as a parlor Socialist, reflecting a satirical tone of the snippet.
The product claims to kill house flies and disease germs including typhoid fever scarlet fever smallpox and sumption. The advertisement positions Wilson's Fly Pads as a health safeguard by eliminating flies and associated pathogens.
The director notes a pattern in inquiries from different groups. He says young girls ask only who is he while young widows ask what is his position and older widows wonder where is he.
A nervous young wife pleads for an urgent operation, saying expense is no object. The eminent surgeon replies that they will operate at once, without consulting the patient, in a curt exchange cited by Hertzberger's Week.
The piece surveys varied notions of rest from starch dressed attire to sleeping in cemeteries and watching crowds. It urges readers to explore their own unique relaxation method and practice it for personal well being.
The guide advises cleaning and steaming potatoes in their jackets, then removing skins to reheat briefly. Baking preserves nutrients. wash, scrub, bake 1.5 to 2 hours, turning once or twice. Check doneness by softness, and a buttered onion juice filling enhances flavor. Mint in boiling water improves flavor.
The Washington Star notes the campaign restarts and new players emerge while the core arguments remain the same as in past games. The item uses sports like language to describe political contests and shifting lineups.
A playful cartoonish note features a speaker recalling a Nap time dream of working as a brewery demonstrator. The vignette blends whimsy with a sly nod to leisure, memory, and small urban humor as imagined by Puck.
Dr. A W Chase's Nerve Food advertised as a remedy for rheumatism and nerve diseases. Claims include restoring blood quality to alleviate fatigue and pain with a testimonial from Mrs M A Clock of Meaford Ontario and notes on the product being sold by Edmanson Bates & Co in Toronto.
Emily and Angelina discuss a signals code to communicate within a restricted house. The code uses five handkerchief waves to ask Do you love me and a frantic reply to answer Yes, darling. No other questions are asked.
The ad claims Parmelee’s Vegetable Pills as the best liver corrective, noting common causes of liver disruption such as chill exposure and indulgence in food or drink. It portrays the pills as leading with no superior rivals among similar preparations.
A Washington Star quote centers on Joshua who longs for a real chance to show his abilities. Farmer Corntessel and his wife discuss Josh as someone who repeatedly ends up doing things he cannot do despite effort.
Using Wilson's Fly Pads as directed on each package helps maintain a fly free dining room and kitchen. The genuine Wilson's product is presented as superior and unmatched by other killers.
A playful confession from Tom in Chicago Tribune to reveal the last domestic animal, described as bristly and muddy, noting it is himself in a humorously self deprecating style.
An ad promotes Saladay Tea using choicest hill-grown leaves for a delicate fragrance and flavor. A court scene includes a dialogue where a prisoner calls himself not suspicious while addressing the magistrate.
A Halifax area reader reports use of Minard's Liniment leading to a complete cure for a long standing facial tumor. The testimonial by David Henderson from Belleisle Station, King's Co., New Brunswick is dated Sept 17, 1904.
A quoted exchange from the Chicago Journal describes a man admitting a phrase about a woman’s marble brow arched eyebrows eyes like diamonds and lips like rubies. The dialogue frames a courtly flattery moment with a guilty plea.
Minard's Liniment adage urges that confidence is essential to achievement. It warns that admitting weakness or doubt weakens self belief and threatens success, emphasizing that a person must feel capable to meet any challenge.
The Metropolitan Asylums Board runs the Witham Home in Essex where boys aged 12 to 21 classified as feeble-minded are taught trades. A brass band formed to improve mental health has produced rapid musical progress and notable gains in sanity, with several cases nearing discharge as mentally fit. The home plans uniforms for band members and may hire a full-time bandmaster.
Consul Edward I Nathan of Patris Greece describes the preparation and export of hasheesh, noting a plant grown in Peloponnesus. The drug, ground from seeds, induces sleep and dreams, wrecking users and leading Egypt to ban imports and seal a GreekEgypt export convention.
The famed rose tree near the ancient Hildesheim church in Germany is said to have been planted by Charlemagne. Its trunk nears the size of a man, five main limbs spread along the church wall, and iron rails confine a twenty six square foot area while eras of soldiers and rulers protected or restricted access.
A discussion of how bodily conditions shape dreams with examples from Clark University experiments. Children favor animal imagery in nightmares while adults fear burglars and jailers as revealed by personal testimonies gathered in a psychological laboratory.
A fragment notes Briggs as extravagantly short of money and repeatedly unable to borrow, with an implied effort to obtain a loan from an unnamed lender. The exchange hints at financial embarrassment and social tension in a small community.
Dyspepsia is blamed on stomach and liver dysfunction and exhausts sufferers. Parmelee's Vegetable Pills are promoted as a proven remedy refined by years of use, claiming superior value over competing advertised products.
A clipped Chicago News joke shows Smanley and Arrdup debating money’s voice. Arrdup asserts money talks, claiming his pan says goodbye whenever he handles a dollar.
A short Philadelphia Inquirer cartoon caption shows Bertie responding to a neighbor about calls from his mother. The joke hinges on the line about her seven calls and not yet calling Albert. The humor centers on family and everyday misunderstandings.
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