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This newspaper page contains 28 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Russell Banner
Location
Russell, Manitoba, Canada
Date
Sep 14, 1905
Page
7
Mark Twain visited Hannibal Missouri the town of his birth and told schoolchildren a humorous true story about a sick schoolboy. The doctor tests the boy noting pains and stiffness then reveals it is Friday not Saturday, leading to a comic rush to avoid missing school as the day ends.
The text describes sleeplessness from nervous strain linked to digestive derangement and offers Parmelee's Vegetable Pills as a remedy. It claims the pills do not induce sleep but provide refreshment and restoration after use, alleviating distress.
A visitor to Harvard Memorial Hall found only the colored waiters could identify Busts and learned they regarded one as the college boss. The exchange highlighted unfamiliarity with Eliot and the campus figure, ending with a quip that a Harvard man would know the bust.
A Boston man with a Maine estate hosts city guests at dinner and notes that champagne and Jersey milk cost him the same. He quips that a gentleman can choose either, as both items incur equal expense.
A lady reports removing corn with Holloway's Corn Cure and claims others have the same success. The note emphasizes effective relief using the advertised remedy.
A terse exchange reveals a tension over memory and forgiveness. One party insists forgiveness was granted but not the implied forgetting, hinting at unresolved history driving current conflict.
A Kansas City man faced jury duty with a comic dilemma as he fretted over missing an afternoon engagement with a young woman. He feared serving would ruin his chances of courting her, yet fellow jurors urged him to stay. The tale ends with him retained on the panel.
A Ontario mother recommends Baby's Own Tablets for her ill infant. The ad claims the tablets ease constipation teething troubles diarrhoea fevers and promote sleep. It guarantees no opiates or poisonous soothing agents and offers mail orders at 25 cents per box plus a free infant care booklet.
On a Hudson River day boat a young girl drew attention by trying for a tan in a single day. Sunbathing on the hurricane deck she sat hatless, lifting her face to the sun, wetting her ker chief to moisten and dry her skin as wind and heat worked. She toiled for a shade of tan more than most work all summer, heedless of onlookers.
The dialogue notes passengers escaping a vessel on a raft, pondering improvised sea craft. The exchange questions use of ship logs and calls for applying reasoning to justify survival tactics.
James McNeil Whistler debates artistic temperament with an admirer. He notes differences between people and compares matching flames to matches, saying all blaze similarly when examined closely.
A shopper in a large department store boasts how a hat she disliked led to a barter, trading the unwanted hat for three pounds of butter and a mouse trap, praising the exchange system to a fellow customer in the elevator.
A humorous exchange mocks Spenditt’s search for work while noting his late fortune. The speakers joke about his past wealth, an ultra fast auto, a rapid horse, and a failed comic opera venture that flopped.
The article advocates Parmelee's Vegetable Pills as a restorative for fatigue from overwork and stress. It links constant business labor to stomachic trouble, lassitude, and depression, claiming the remedy restores digestive action and revives low mood and energy.
In a playful exchange, Young Thorne asks if Rose is his chosen name as she replies with affection. Rose pauses on identity, then confesses she cannot be a rose without a Thorne, hinting at a dramatic romantic tension.
The teacher recounts a meeting with an impertinent tramp and says she fainted. Johnny Jim fries, the pugilist's son, quips asking which side she fainted with.
An advertisement proclaims Wolford's Sanitary Lotion cures Itch, Mange and Prairie scratches on humans or animals in 30 minutes. It claims universal effectiveness and availability at all druggists.
A humorous dialogue contrasts comfort in the open air. Pat asserts ease outdoors while Faith recalls a blast exposure that left him uncomfortable even during a short ten minute open air period. The exchange highlights seasonal mood and hardy outdoorsmanship.
In a light exchange a man with an infant asks for a teething article. The druggist suggests the term baby comforter and the man jokes that it should be called Dad's comforter based on the chewing comfort it provides.
Many deaths from cholera and summer illnesses could be prevented with prompt treatment. Do not delay in getting Dr. J. D. Kellogg's Dysentery Cordial, a medicine claimed to cure quickly and relieve pain and distress.
Dialogue reveals a playful tension as he proclaims love even to death while she weighs his stated preference for blondes. He jokes about dying for her. she hints at changing her look to win his affection.
A letter from David Henderson of Belleisle Station Kings County New Brunswick dated September 17 1904 reports a long standing facial tumor cured by using several bottles of Minard's Liniment. The testimonial credits the remedy with complete healing and disappearance of the tumor.
A tele phone operator warns a caller to disconnect after accusing her of intruding on her partner. The quarrel escalates as threats are issued over the shared line.
A Winnipeg notice promotes Keeley Cure services at 133 Osborne St Fort Rouge, claiming recovery from liquor and drug use. The ad urges readers to write today for necessary information.
On Whitsunday the northern English church vicar, kept busy by many weddings, refused another couple at first but relented saying he would marry them this time and warned not to repeat the event. The scene shows his humor and authority amid wedding demand.
The note touts Dr Thomas Eclectric Oil as a lubricant that keeps muscles pliant and free from pains caused by constant use. It claims to ease bruises sprains and contusions without softening muscles or weakening strength.
A lighthearted snippet on Mayme and Maybelle describing the courtship of Mr. and Mrs. Pyrrh Simmons. It contrasts romance with homely appearances and modest means, noting their seaside season romance as notable.
An endorsement from William B. Best of Cayuga Ontario describes kidney derangements and poor circulation as causing cramps and restless nights. The testimonial asserts Dr Chase's Kidney Liver Pills relieve symptoms from the first use and claims complete cure with continued use. Available at drug stores and Edmanson Bates in Toronto.
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