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This newspaper page contains 28 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Russell Banner
Location
Russell, Manitoba, Canada
Date
Sep 12, 1912
Page
7
Railway officials endorse the system as young men are placed quickly as telegraphers freight and ticket clerks. Day and night mail courses prepare students. free book 19 offered by Dominion School Railroading Toronto.
The remark notes that the human body contains sulphur in varying quantities among individuals, suggesting differences in sulfur content. It presents no precise figures or methods of measurement.
The viator asks about edites in-chief at eight in the morning. The chairman says the editor does not arrive that early. A man says he is in the poetical department and that he empties the waste-paper baskets for the magazine.
A child recalls a dangerous home event where a father’s papering mishap creates a giant paste serpent. Family members watch as the sticky creature swallows the baby, then the parents and others are pulled into the chaos before a paste pail wrecks the scene.
In a doomed vessel catastrophe a burly passenger fears caving to save himself, while a stern captain rebukes the cowardly question. A rescue ship arrives as an irate uncle orders a final bitter kick but is quelled by the nephew’s duty and a hot-water bottle from a water-logged state com.
Comedian Harry Lauder, famed for caring for pit ponies, wowed Blackpool by awarding medals to winning donkeys and performing on a sand stage. He recounted a coal mine accident where a pony halted a drift, saving both their lives as tons of rock fell.
The humorist Eugene Field recalls a London dinner anecdote about lynching in the United States. He claims to have witnessed a waiter hanged after a gown was ruined, then reveals he was downstairs killing a chef for mustard in a blancmange, to laughter and shock.
In a street dialogue Patigued Felix laments the hardships of the profession while Hungry Henry questions its validity. Felix argues that workers can strike by quitting to seek jobs, contrasting abuse with labor action and survival.
Edith recalls past romances as Ferdie asks about poets. She mentions a former sweetheart who faced a kick from a football player, highlighting a playful or provocative memory from their conversation.
Weil returns home tired and finds his wife has used a letter to test his honesty. John, startled, discovers the envelope is addressed to him and reads the contents, revealing a concealed trap and a guilty conscience.
A notice urges rapid action against cholera and dysentery with Kellogg's Dysentery Cordial as an affordable remedy. It claims relief before a doctor is summoned and emphasizes urgent care to protect bowel lining.
A solicitor with an unusually long nose and chin, lacking teeth, is warned that their features will clash soon as they grow closer. The punchline has him replying that many words have already passed between them, implying a heated verbal dispute.
A garbled excerpt mentions Minard's Liniment claimed to cure diphtheria. Dialogue includes Sam Johnson and a distressed landlady with a ledger remark about meat preparation. The text shows regional dialect and fragmented humor without a clear news event or attribution.
A nostalgic note extols relief from asthma using Dr J D Kellogg s Asthma Remedy claiming immediate help and a chance to live without attacks. The piece stresses independence from sudden symptoms and renewed life.
A storm lashes the coast as a man and a maid sit close and ask why the wind rages. She shouts over the gale with a playful fear while he answers with a booming shrug about the wind’s ache.
A Kentucky woman describes indigestion and nervous exhaustion improving after replacing breakfast with Grape-Nuts and cream. She reports renewed strength and mental poise, noting pain receded when avoiding rich foods. She cites the brand’s marketing line There’s a reason and The Road to Wellville.
A misdirected zealot, Uncle William, is defined as a man who when his house burns tries to stop flames by kicking his own face to stop wagging his tail.
A brittle stage moment shows a performer heckling Jones as he prepares to appear. The exchange hints at backstage tension with a taunting remark about being a “sil y goat” and getting ready to take the cue.
After two decades of chronic itching and suffering, a medical reform brings relief and cure from piles enabling a renewed life. A patient describes dramatic improvement following new treatment, marking a turning point in personal health.
A testimonial ad promotes Dr Chase's Ointment as a cure for itching piles and skin ailments. It claims doctors favor surgery rarely needed and cites a patient, Mr John P Marshall of St Johns Nild, cured after one and a half boxes. Sample box offered with a 2 cent stamp. price 60c a box.
In New York a new fad features stockings embroidered with life size mice. Each pair costs six dollars and draws attention from shoppers and collectors alike.
A parish church on the Isle of Wight houses a white marble statue of Captain Sir Robert Holmes, Wight's 17th century leader, who captured a French vessel carrying a partial statue of Le Grand Monarque. Holmes forced the sculptor aboard to finish the likeness, pairing his own head with Louis XIV's body, a humorous and striking display noted by guidebooks.
An old advertisement extols Holloway's Corn Cure as the simplest and best remedy for corn relief, claiming it yields regardless of corn age and provides an effective public solution.
Tourists reach Blarney Castle in Cork to glimpse the tower and the famed kissing stone. The ascent demands being lowered by the heels to reach the stone, a task tied to a legend dating to Queen Elizabeth’s era and the Lord of Blarney’s feigned promises.
A clever tale features a doctor declaring a patient cured of distemper then agreeing to barter the medical bill. The patient, a former Sherman band leader in shabby clothes, offers to perform music for a month in front of the doctor’s house to settle the debt.
A Louisville Courier-Journal item notes a doctor described as a regular human dy namo who left the observer feeling highly charged after contact. The brief reflects a personal impression with no formal report of event or outcome.
A rustic mother reacts to news of a striped kimono sent home by her son. She jokes about locking it away in the yard or pig-sties, unsure what to feed or do with the garment while his absence hangs over the district visit.
A local baronet Sir John Huttit faces a humorous cricket moment when an onlookers footman acts as umpire and declares not at home after questioning the decision. In another anecdote Wilkins vents anger at a wayward tee being crossed just before a drive prompting Johnson to joke about stealing a tee shot.
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