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Newspaper
Russell Banner
Location
Russell, Manitoba, Canada
Date
Jul 16, 1914
Page
2
An OCR fragment advertises a “dollar book” and urges immediate book writing with terms for freight credit. It mentions Nichols Limited, Pubfishers, Toronto, and refers to Ireland in a sales pitch. The text is sparse and fragmentary, offering little verifiable detail.
A London Mail note discusses the saying darkest hour before dawn and attributes morning light increase to dew deposits and hoarfrost. It links chilliness to dew and frost forming before daylight, clarifying the proverb’s origins.
A fragmentary quip presents Mr Me XMixe puzzled by unfamiliar steps, replying that he was out of town for the weekend and thus did not learn the latest dance moves. The terse exchange hints at a social misstep or cultural moment without broader context.
Lucy pleads with Harold as he vows to go to battle and return a hero or not at all. She warns him not to get hurt while he prepares to face dangers in a desolate country. He embraces glory, she fears death, and they bid farewell in a dramatic Chicago Record-Herald moment.
The piece cites Irvin S. Cobb noting Neapolitans do not wrap spaghetti on a fork but inhale a loose strand in one motion. The mass uncoils and vanishes into the throat, making them appear to siphon the pasta. The author likens the act to trained worms and jokes Americans lack the deep breathing habit.
A social investigator questions Willie who moved from a pie team to a carpentry job for lower wages. He explains the bakery hurt his mouth as he stones cherries and notes a rule requiring boys to whistle while working to deter cherry consumption.
Roald Amundsen the Norwegian polar explorer born in Sarpsborg on July 16 1872. He spent youth in Christiania and served on sealers and whalers then joined the Belgica expedition as first officer at twenty five. He later sought science in Germany and aimed for farther polar travel after navigating the Northwest Passage and wintering twice in ice.
A smart youth late for school had dirty hands from marble play and offered a soiled hand for punishment. The teacher demanded the dirtiest hand, and the boy quickly displayed his clean other hand, declaring it dirtier, ending the matter with a sharp quip.
The London Standard describes a Fiji sugar cane meke dance famed for its clever, curious display. Dancers squat, murmur unintelligible phrases, then rise as if growing tall, waving arms and shivering in wind like rising cane, while chanting louder. The final scene symbolizes chiefs enforcing crops.
Washington Irving aphorism noting that small minds are subdued by mirrovene while great minds rise above it, highlighting a caution about influence and intellect.
Nervous children with twitching and jerking limbs are said to be cured by Dr Williams Pink Pills. The ad cites a Halifax area mother’s testimony and offers mail order pills at 50 cents a box, six for $2.50, from The Dr Williams Medicine Co Brockville Ont.
The Washington family patriarch listens as his son, soon to be of age, tells him he wants to become an artist. The father replies with cautious approval, adding a playful caveat that the boy must not “draw on me.”
A Washington Star quip asks if politics is singular or plural. Senator Sorgum notes his personal experience suggests singular due to a conspicuous lack of plurality.
The Grouch recalls the joke as the Boob asks about Lim. The Grouch explains Lim fell behind on room rent and had to marry his landlady, a humorous anecdote noted by the Cincinnati Enquirer.
Mothers who know how quickly croup can seize a child and the need for prompt relief keep Dr. Thomas Eclectric Oil at hand. Experience shows its varied cures make it a valuable medicine for this ailment.
A party of 53 farmers led by Johannes Adriaan Nes ser, member for Potchefstroom in the Union of South Africa parliament, has departed for England en route to America to study agricultural methods.
In a clipped exchange from the Philadelphia Inquirer a bantering pair discuss a barrier and the behavior of vegetarians. The dialogue hints at social pretensions and mockery, with one tramp noting that two dogs accompany the other. The piece reads as a satirical micro-scene reflecting urban attitudes.
The coronation of Emperor Yoshito is fixed for November 1915. It was postponed from the originally planned date next November due to the death of the Dowager Empress.
A playful family exchange centers on who makes talking machines with playful dialect. The matriarch notes not made at home, while a child suggests Dorn as the maker and a parent dismisses the idea, ending with a bedtime remark.
In a witty exchange from the Boston Transcript a character named Gibbs asks about summer plans, while Gibbs replies that his wife waits for a neighbor with a grudge to recommend the worst spot on the continent.
A humorous exchanges notes Simpson’s pre marriage earnings versus post marriage reality. The speaker recalls his prior salary being substantial, while the wife now praises his earnings that barely meet the standard, reflecting domestic financial humor.
A Cleveland Leader excerpt shows two men debating a proposal to prevent marriages of weakminded persons. Mr Snoope cites two movements on foot while Mr Grouch challenges the aim, asking who else would want to marry.
Fragmentary OCR note mentions Murine Eye Remedy and various garbled names. It reads like a faded 19th or early 20th century advertisement or medical claim with unclear references to eye treatments and individuals, lacking coherent dates or places.
Two French naval officers Victor Col in and Maurice Jeance conducted long distance wireless telephone tests over 150 miles. Conversations proved clearer than typical wire connections. Successful tests spanned Paris to a receiving station at a country house near Tours in Mettary.
A playful note from the Courier Journal quotes a couple's exchange about letters versus gramophone records, highlighting old fashioned courtship and music as a social cue. The flippant line captures the era's romance and media culture in a compact social vignette.
The late Rey Silvester Horne recalled a London visit to Ipswich where Mr Balfour drew a crowd and extra police. An old lady mistook the Unionist leader for an Ipswich Assizes figure and quipped that if he had done wrong he must suffer.
Toronto's board of education plans open air schools in tents for tuberculous and delicate children. Two Forest Schools will operate this year in the east and west ends, with meals provided and outdoor instruction as much as possible. Over 207 pupils applied eagerly after the project was announced.
The first daguerreotype ever taken in Ameview shows the Unit arian church at Washington Square New York City. The exposure was made by Professor E F S Morse and lasted fifteen minutes.
A traveler recalls being found and gagged by bandits in Italy. A friend mocks the scene as comic opera, but the other insists the bandits were serious and their gags were new. The exchange underscores the danger and oddity of the episode.
A Chicago chemist reports that each human body contains over two pounds of phosphorus, enough to make 5,000 friction match packages if extracted. Scientists say phosphorus is vital for health and bone strength, and may stimulate nerve cells. Bodies also hold ounces of sodium and about three quarters of an ounce of potassium, plus small magnesium traces resembling silver rain.
A brief exchange from the Cleveland Plain Dealer shows a governess objecting to children eating with the family to avoid them adopting faulty grammar. The dialogue reveals concerns over language influence and authority in a household setting.
A salesman touts an alarm clock that guarantees a dramatic wakeup, claiming it will make a flow jump out of bed. The buyer counters that the device does not ring properly and instead merely honks, challenging the claim.
In the Kwa Ibo estuary the Eket and ibeno maidens kneel at the sea edge praying to the sea goddess Uman Ibeno for husbands. Men seek aid in danger and hardship. A sacrifice of white cocks and hens is required, amount varying with the petitioner’s wealth.
A fragmented London Punch item riffs on a local mayor’s wife and a stray dog inquiry. The brief gag comments on social bustle and nightly disturbances with a tongue in cheek tone typical of humor columns.
Miller's Worm Powders claim to restore appetite and ease biliousness by treating worms. They assert stomach liver and bowels respond quickly, improving infant health once treatment starts.
A story about Dr. Weir Mitchell recalls a patient witnessing him closing a bundle of resignations from committees and boards. He jokes he will die with a tombstone stating he is committed to the grave, reflecting his humorous stance on public duties.
A fragment from the Baltimore American notes a singing dog and an exhibition at a theatre. The exchange questions what the dog sings, with the reply “Oh, barbarolles.”
A little girl hears that a dying child is taken to heaven by an angel. After a thoughtful pause she responds that if an angel comes asking for her, she will say she is not in. The remark captures a child’s blunt, humorous take on mortality and heaven.
A National Food Magazine anecdote recounts Johnny declining chicken gravy thrice amid a dinner table mix up. He explains he enjoys it sometimes but his mother never uses wind pipes in the dish, sparking a humorous exchange about preferences and ingredients.
Lamson refuses to eat at a church supper after a serving lady claims every dish was cooked by his wife. Lamson responds he is not hungry, showing embarrassment or surprise in a candid New York Times anecdote.
Detroit Free Press quotes a speaker reflecting on pride and humility. The remark notes personal foolishness yet claims wisdom in a single skill of papering a bedroom, revealing a humorous self assessment.
In a reminiscence a Yankee seeks glory by testing Admiral Dewey. The admiral answers “You win” and moves on, illustrating a humorous moment with the hero of the American Squadron. James Baker frames this anecdote as light gossip.
A small crowd gathered outside a store window to see an automatic typewriter in action. Two women paused to watch the keys bobbing and, with a sly remark, suggested the device would suit Jenny's husband for his office better than his blonde wife.
A brief quip from the London Opinion plays on Scots dialect about difficulty standing. The exchange uses humor to highlight stubbornness and resilience in a lighthearted political or social tone.
In Cincinnati a quip from Mrs. Gabb about a man’s memory after death prompts Mr. Gabb to retort that marriage to his widow keeps a memory alive. The exchange highlights a witticism circulating in local circles.
A spirited exchange reveals two husbands equally stubborn as one woman recalls arranging to meet at three. She arrived nearly at 4 30 and notes the delay did him some good while he waited. The humorous dispute highlights domestic foibles in everyday life.
A busy man quizzes a chronic bore who asks for a light in a crowded office. The bore notes the cigar has gone out and the exchange highlights the idle interruption. The brief vignette captures a humorous moment of social friction.
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