Evangelist’s teeth quip sparks gallery shout
An evangelist ends a sermon by warning of impending wrath. A witness in the gallery declares she has no teeth, prompting the reply that teeth will be provided. The anecdote appears in Success Magazine.
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Newspaper
Russell Banner
Location
Russell, Manitoba, Canada
Date
Aug 19, 1909
Page
11
An evangelist ends a sermon by warning of impending wrath. A witness in the gallery declares she has no teeth, prompting the reply that teeth will be provided. The anecdote appears in Success Magazine.
Ready made medicine claim for Dr Thomas Eclectic Oil. Advertises it as effective for coughs and bronchial troubles, sore throat, scalds burns bruises sprains cuts and ulcers. Describes no testimonial needed, only user results to prove efficacy.
The mayor explains the townsmen feared mismanagement by a bankrupt telephone company and took action by “hanging up the receiver,” a striking phrase quoted by the Chicago News. The exchange highlights local frustration with the telephone service.
In a light from Tit-Bits a story notes a claim about Minard's Liniment curing distemper. An odd exchange follows where one man thanks a stranger after being arrested for an earlier act, illustrating a comic or ironic instance.
Warning against mercury based catarrh ointments with a focus on the risks of mucous surface damage. Endorses Hall's Catarrh Cure by F J Cheney Co Toledo Ohio as mercury free and orally active against blood and mucous membranes. Includes price and pharmacist guidance.
The Rev Dr Sipprell, president of Columbian College in New Westminster, impresses Methodists with flowing sermons on a Rockies trip. He exclaims about the mountain’s bottom, prompting a brakeman to quip that one would find “a lot of hard work.”
The piece cites Admiral Kingsmill arguing for a Canadian navy to supply laces for dullards. It quotes a Kincardine Review reminiscence of a captain teasing a middy about an old sea tale, noting a change since the old days.
Western journalist recalls Amos J. Cummings of New York once city editor of the Sun. He sent his reporter Murray to check if saloons would sell liquor next day after a statewide closure announcement. The reporter filed back that saloons were selling liquor.
Dr. J. D. Kellogg promotes his Dysentery Cordial as a special remedy for dysentery cholera morbus and inflammatory stomach and intestinal disorders caused by food or water. It claims quicker relief and notes these complaints are more common in summer though not limited to warm months.
Bessie pleads with Mabel after a quarrel with Harry ends with the demand to return him. The central snag is Bessie’s memory of Harry’s ring. The scene centers on personal tension and the search for a remedy amid affection and loss.
Farmer Corntessel jokes about tending a garden as a decoy while claiming to have ordered canned goods for summer boarders. The neighbor questions how the small plot could feed everyone. Washington Star quotes the exchange.
An advertisement touts Murine Marine Eye Remedy as relief for red weak weary watery eyes and eye strain in schoolchildren. It claims soothing pain without smarting and lists no prohibited drugs with a 50 cent price. offers free eye health literature from The Marine Eye Remedy Co Chicago.
A rare sale in New York showcases Lord Alfred Tennyson’s own first edition copy of Maud with his signature on the title page. Another Maud edition includes a personal letter to Bulkeley Platt. The auction also features Helen’s Tower with a Browning poem, a Dufferin memorial piece, fetching $390 at a prior sale.
Summer illnesses strike suddenly and kill thousands of infants each year. Baby's Own Tablets regulate stomach and bowels, prevent and cure tummy troubles, and are safe for newborns and children. A box costs 25 cents and should be kept on hand by every mother for timely use. Sold by medicine dealers or by mail from The Dr Williams Medicine Co Brockville Ont.
During the siege of Fredericksburg a Confederate skirmish party surprised a Federal brigade. After exchange of fire the attackers charged, one emaciated Johnny emptied a fallen soldier’s knapsack and waved the loot, shouting that the Union troops had cheese.
Soft corns are hard to eradicate but Holloway's Corn Cure claims to draw them out painlessly, offering quick relief for afflicted feet.
Mr Parkay notes two seats are in different rows one behind the other. The ticket seller asks if one seat is for a lady and confirms. He is told to sit behind the lady and to blame himself if he brings a big hat. New York Evening Journal reports the policy.
A. E. Roy of St Antoine Quebec writes that after a vicious horse bite in June 98 the pain subsided in five hours and the wounds healed in two weeks following use of Minard's Liniment. He praises its effect and recovery of hand and arm.
A summer in the country made Scott an authority on farming. He advised friends that when milking a cow you should sit on the side farthest from the animal and nearest the cow’s soft spot in the pasture.
Practically all Canadian druggists grocers and general dealers sell Wil son's Fly Pads. If your storekeeper does not ask him why.
A tall muscular man exits an office while a visitor assumes he is a prizefighter. The editor clarifies they hire for strength to coerce engravers into correcting work, not for artistic knowledge.
Mary asks to compare a penny collection plate gift with a quarter her aunt displays. The girl reacts with disbelief, saying the larger coin isn’t worth it, while staying close to her aunt.
This piece defines good taste as an innate sense of fitness guiding behavior in public and private life. It warns against loud talk, conspicuous displays, scandal, and ostentation, urging propriety, reticence, and consideration for others' feelings.
The article notes brief names like Y in the Zuyder Zee and Amsterdam river Y, a Henan city Y, a French river and a Swedish town named Y or A. It cites individuals with similar names Theresa O in Brussels and a Madame O in Paris, and a youth who signed military papers with a cross due to illiteracy.
A St Peter's correspondent notes vandalism in the choir chapel where grisaille panes in the glass are scratched with interwoven names of tribes and tongues. The ancient glass shows random flourishes and dates, defacing the surface in a bold act of indiscriminate vandalism.
J A C Cameron from Cornwall arrives as referee and clerk to the Master in Ordinary at Osgoode Hall in Toronto. He installs Osgoode's first business telephone, prompting the Law Society phones to be added and the government to equip offices with telephones.
An old advertisement extols Dr Chase's Kidney Liver Pills as fastest relief for spring kidney issues. It claims to cleanse kidneys liver and bowels, restore excretory balance, and cites a testimonial from Mrs F O Bacon of Baldwins Mills Quebec who says the pills cured her liver and kidney troubles without hospital care. Pills priced 25 cents a box and sold by dealers or Edmanson Bates Co Toronto.
In a cross examination a lawyer presses a woman for her age. She blushes and stammers I I, then stops. The attorney urges gentleness as the moment grows more tense and awkward in court.
An 19th century advisory notes that when excretory organs fail the intestines clog leading to danger and recommends Pare melee's Vegetable Pills as a speedy cure. It states effects appear almost immediately after starting a course of treatment.
A judge questions a witness identified as a freeholder asking about marital status and opinions. The reply confirms three years of marriage as of last June and that no opinions have been formed or expressed for three years.
If every housekeeper uses Wil son’s Fly Pads freely during the summer months the house fly peril would soon be a thing of the past.
A traveler entering Montenegro steps into a historical moment at the Montenegrin Albanian border. He encounters border raids and vendetta acts reminiscent of medieval quarrels once described in history, with English and Scottish actors in a nineteenth century imagination.
Miss Florence Nightingale celebrates her 90th birthday confined to her room yet receives a vast flow of presents and congratulatory telegrams from around the world while reported in frail health.
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