05 Aug 1880
Page 1
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This newspaper page contains 10 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Acton Free Press
Location
Acton, Ontario, Canada
Date
Aug 05, 1880
Page
1
A dim church hushed for prayer trembles as a brown eyed baby girl enters the aisle alone. A nearby man steadies her, the sermon fades, and the speaker wonders if he will be guided to heaven’s gates by an angel at the end.
Farmer Henderson vows to kill Old Dan the farm rascal after a morning quarrel. Ned works in the fields while Carrie 13 washes dishes and tends to chores awaiting a visitor at the door.
A ragged visitor to a country home visits a family and steals a grandmother's silver spoons and cream pitcher. The thief is chased by Old Dan the ram, who trounces him in a brief battle, recovering the silver. Carrie and Ned praise the ram for protecting the household valuables and humorously spare his life.
A Detroit tenant repeatedly dodges eviction with feigned illnesses until a dying moment reveals his wits. An officer taunts the couple as the man asserts he will move out in forty minutes, and the family completes the evacuation in twenty, angering the officer.
Sockery Kapagcor recounts a comic rural incident with Katrina involving a chicken coop parcel, a parrel trap, and a daring rescue that ends with Katrina fleeing and Sockery claiming victory over the mishap. The piece uses dialect narration to describe a humorous mishap in a farm setting.
A cynical writer compares a crowd of boys in long coats chasing butterflies to a grand view of the world, where the butterflies become doudes, creating a striking, ironic panorama. The remark offers a wry commentary on aspiration and illusion within society.
A bizarre notice describes a 30 year old 19 pound mule named Marquis and a 22 year old 13 pound mute woman, German born, exhibiting across Europe and planning to settle in their homeland. A separate tale recounts a wagoner riding a donkey who refuses a drain jump, prompting the rider to be thrown as the beast eyes him and mocks his attempt.
A small excerpt describes an Irishman with a pig in his possession who alternates between overeating and fasting. When questioned about the pattern he responds with a humorous, clipped explanation implying a personal preference for indulgence and restraint.
A rustic lament questions who tramples a yard and gate a yawning farmer lets trespassers roam while a cabot tanks owner and gilded banker are mocked for owning banks of loam and clay and shares of mold as dividends rise with each break.
A fragmentary article argues against alcohol moderation citing historical figures and statistics. It cites Duke of Wellington and Massachusetts taunts, notes increases in arrests after beer votes, cites Boston fire era measures, and contrasts wine to whiskey with examples of social harm and personal tragedy.
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