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EN ROUTE TO LOUISVILLE My employers and my family are under the mistaken impression that I am travelling to Louisville for the expressed purpose of writing about Saturday’s 100th annual running of The Kentucky Derby. The truth is that my main mission is to protect Milt Dunnell from pickpockets.UncleMiltie Dunnell, the distinguished sports editor emeritus of the Toronto Star, is a man who invariably gets into travelling-difficulties on those occasions when I am unable to accompany him. Every wellknown pickpocket in the world has a photograph and a complete description of Mr. Dunnell in his file of Prime Prospects. »Mr. Dunnell insists upon carrying his wallet in his righthand hip pocket. For the past 20 years, his admirers and concerned friends have been beseeching him to move his wallet to a safer place—such as the inside-pocket of his jacket.“Don’t be silly,” replies AJr. Dunnell, when he is urged to improve his personal security arrangements. “I keep my wallet where the pickpockets can get at it without ripping my clothes. My suits cost $250 and, you should see the damage that one of those pickpockets can do to a new suit with a razorblade! ”When I am accompanying Mr. Dunnell on a sports-writing assignment in a foreign city, I always walk exactly two paces behind him, guarding him from the possibility of a flanking attack. He resents this protective surveillance, but he acknowledges grudgingly that he never has been robbed on any trip when he has been under my personal supervision.Regretably, there have been occasions when it was impossible for me to accompany Mr. Dunnell on his foreign sportswriting assignments. For Mr. Dunnell, those trips have been unmitigated financial disasters.POOR POLICINGHe travelled, alone, to Kingston, Jamaica, in 1973 to cover the heavyweight championship boxing bout between Joe Frazier and George Foreman.When Foreman scored his unexpected knockout over Frazier, Mr. Dunnell was in the vanguard of reporters who surged into Foreman’s dressing-room to interview the new champion. Approximately 50 uniformed Jamaica policemen were inside the dressing-room, to preserve order.This display of police force made Mr. Dunnell over-confident. He whipped out a notepad and a pencil and he scribbled notes furiously.When Mr. Dunnell left that dressing-room, he had enough notes to provide material for a novel—but, he didn’t have his well-filled wallet!Some wily pickpocket had robbed Mr. Dunnell, under the very eyes of 50 policemen.Just a few months ago, Mr. Dunnell travelled, alone again, to Caracas, Venezuela, for the heavyweight bout between Muhammad Ali and Joe Frazier.Mr. Dunnell wasn’t taking any chances in Caracas. He wasn’t going into any more dressing-rooms, no sireee! Mr. Dunnell decided to climb right into the well-guarded prize ring to interview Ali, as soon as the bout was concluded.He had a bit of difficulty climbing the steps into the ring and, another gentleman gave him a helpful shove from behind.“Thank you very much,” said Mr.Dunnell, turning to smile at the gentleman who had given him the assisting shove.“You’re welcome,” replied the Good Samaritan, returning Mr. Dunnell’s smile.And, the Good Samaritan retreated into the milling crowd, chuckling happily as he contemplated the contents of Mr. Dunnel’s bulging wallet which he had removed deftly from Mr. Dunnell’s hip pocket.BAD TRACK RECORDMr. Dunnell becomes quite grumpy when his newspaper colleagues josh him about the number of times he has been fleeced by pickpockets. He attempts to laugh-off those misadventures as unworthy of comment. And he refuses to admit that it’s happened more than twice. Nevertheless, there are some close friends who insist that Mr. Dunnell had his wallet lifted on the following occasions:The 1964 Olympic Games in Tokyo; the enthronement of Pope Paul at Rome in 1963; the Grey Cup Final at Montreal in 1969; the coronation of Queen Elizabeth at London in 1953; the finals of the Miss Toronto Beauty Contest at the University of Toronto Stadium in 1970; the fourth game of the Canada-Soviet hockey series at Vancouver in September, 1972.Therefore, my friendly concern for Mr. Dunnell is understandable. The world’s most talented pickpockets are congregating in Louisville this week— and, those miscreants are keenly aware that Mr. Dunnell is in town.Unfortunately, because plane reservations to Louisville have been difficult to obtain this week, Mr. Dunnell was forced to leave Toronto one day ahead of me.Just a few minutes ago, from Toronto Airport, I placed a longdistance telephone-call to him in his Louisville hotel.“Are you still okay?” I asked.“Of course, I’m okay,” he snarled. “I’m not going to leave the hotel until you arrive here. I’m even having my meals served to me in my hotel room.”“Well,” I advised him, “be sure that you keep a damn’ sharp eye on the room-service waiter.”My airplane is warming-up, now, on the tarmac. I trust that I will arrive in Louisville in time to save Mr. Dunnell from the pickpockets.
Newspaper Details
Medicine Hat News
Medicine Hat, Alberta, CA
Wed, May 01, 1974
Page 19
Full Page
Clipped by
Anonymous
USA 26 Jan 2020
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