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Epitor’s Note: Joi Lansing, a Utah-born Mormon who came to Hollywood as a child, has developed over the years (34, in the eatty) into a top-flight singer-comedi enne. After years in Hollywood ,work ing as sex-bait—her measurements are 39-23-35—in such films as Hole in the Head with Frank Sinatra, But Not for Me with Clark Gable, Cinderfella with Jerry Lewis and many others, Joi decided a few years ago to hit the night-club circuit as comedienne and singer. She has played the Waldorf-Astoria, the Americana, the Hit ton Hotels, the Copa, other first-rate spots. “I want to be measured by my talent as well as my statistics,” she declares, but physical proportions are so important to her that she’s installed a small gymnasium in her mountain-top home. It’s equipped with weights, pulleys and a steam room. Herewith some of the jokes Joi tells in between songs. _I once sang for the King of Siam. At least, he told me he was. He said, “Honey, if you’re a singer, I'm the King of Siam.” Once upon a time I went out with a tall, handsome man riding around in his Cadillac. When we got to a dark and lonely spot on the road, the motor coughed and stopped. Right away my escort got out, raised the hood, fixed the motor, drove me back home safe and sound, back to my mother and father— once upon a time. The other night a flyer back from Viet nam told me this story. As his plane was returning from a mission over a Viet Cong installation, it was hit by enemy gunfire. The captain addressed the crew as it started losing altitude, “Anyone here know how to pray?” The radio oper ator answered, “I do, sir.” “Great,” said the captain. You pray. Everybody else prepare to jump, we're one parachute short.” Who says I'm not smart?Last week a salesman told me he had a vacuum cleaner that would cut my housework in a half. So I bought two of them. I live there, and I can tell you that to succeed in Hollywood you simply must have a gimmick. Leslie Caron talks with her big eyes. Jimmy Durante talks with his big nose. Jayne Mansfield and I are pretty talkative, too. There’s a new car on the market. Made its debut last month at the Auto Show. It’s called “The Cleopatra “—no motor, just galley slaves. As a teenager I wanted to go to a coed college. My family wouldn't hear of it. Daddy said I could go to any college in the country providing it wasn't coeduca tional. So I went to West Point. An interviewer once asked me if think of men all the time. Of course I don't. But when I think, I think of men, I'm so glad winter is coming. I love winter sports, especially if they have money.
Newspaper Details
Independent Press Telegram
Long Beach, California, US
Sun, Oct 17, 1965
Page 350
Full Page
Clipped by
Anonymous
USA 11 Sep 2026
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