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THE, For Ihfl Telegraph uml Herald.MOTHER’S MULTIPLICATION TABLE.11V I1ASTIXA.Mother, lift the lit lie shoesMother, smooth Uio tnncled .hair— llt; All your toys you break cr lose V (O tltot I'Llbl * nu«'l a rarr|) MolIicr,dtftr—jialienec strive. I’ivc liir.es one makes only Jfw.“ Mother, can't I hove ft lm.v •• Juet like Allccloy’3, you know : Mother, dear, 1 want o fan.My old one is broken so I‘Child, I looked for comfort, svlien Five tirnes two should moke vou ten(“ That eliilil of mine hus got. a lieau!My 1 how the years do whirl;Wlm'd ilicughtof time e'er changing so.'When I was hut u girl,1’in Mire we plrls were never seen With aay man when but£/'(«».)clenr Around tho lake—ft belt of flies one“ Daughter mine, just |in iny shawl: What a help you are my dear! What a comli»rt to us :dl.'Tia to have « daughter near;Help mollier. dear,.just oue year jnon • For twenty's ouly Jlvo ilmcs/our.”'’My child, for years I've stcn this day, J was ti re that it must come,And I mu« give my child tway— on will lind another home.To keep you, dear, 1 can’t ton I rive.For you’re n wife, and tuentp-jler.Mark Twain.cat,aiONrt r,AKK. OK TIIK l)EAl PEA Ob IIOUNIA.Monolioke, or flic Dead Sen of California, is one of her must extra ordinary curiositicH, but bumg situated in a very out-of-tUc-vuy corner of the country, and away up among the eternal snows of the Sierras, it ia little known and very seldom visited. A witling excitement uarrml me Lbun: an in:, and .1 apecil.hundred miles long. If you throw a s:oi)u Jtiuong them, they hitu.rm up si* thick i-hut they look douse, liko a cloud. You euu hold them under water aa long as you please—they don’t mind it—they are only proud of it. When you let them go, they pop up. to the surfaco as dry as ft ps-tcnt ofiic*i* repnrt, and wullc off' as unconcernedly as if thoy bad boeu educated especially with a view to affording iofltructiroontertaiuinottt to man ia that particular way. Providence haves nothing to go by chance- All things have their use9 and their part and proper place in Nature's economy. The dncks and gulls eat tho flics—the flics eat tho worm*—the Indians eat the flics—tho wild cats cat'the Indians—the white folks cat tho wild cats wheu the trope fail—and thus ail things are lovely.Mono Lake is one huodrod aud fifty miles in a straight line from the ocean— and between it and the ocoan arc otic or two ranges ot' inuuntains-—yet thousands of sc a guile go every season to lay their Cgga and roar tit sir yvuug. One would as soon expect to And sea-gulls in Tennessee. And in this connection fet ms observe auot'icr instance of Nature’# wisdom. The i a Ian da in the lake being merely huge iuubsos of lava, oualcd over with utbcB and puwioo stone, and'utterly inuqdcut lt;i‘ vegetation or anything that would burn; and sea-gulls egga being entirely useless to anybody unless they be cooked, nature has proridcd an unfailing spring of boiling water on the largest island, and you oa?j put your eggs J in thero, and U four minutes you can boil them as hard as any statement I have made during the past fifteen years. Within ton feet of tho boiling Bpring is a spring of pure cold water, sirccfc and wholesome. So/iu that island, you can et board and washing free of charge—■w(several months in its vicinity. It lies j ^ if Jiuje hiiTgotTo further, and furIiu u. lifeless, treeless, hidoous desert, eight- thouinud feet above the level of the sea, and is guarded by mountains two thousand feet higher, whose sum-luito urc hid dun awoy in the clouds.- -This HolcuJii, f-ileut, sail less sou—this luuely tenant of the loooliesl upot ojj earth—is little graced with the picturesque. It i# an unpretending expanse of grayish water, about a hundred miles in circumference, with Uvo islands in its centre, mere upheavals of rent and .scorched and blistered lava..snowed over with gray banks and drifts of pumice stcQo and ashes, the winding sheet of tho dead volcano, whose vast crater tho lake Baa so teed upon and occupied.Tho lake is two hundred feet deep.and its sluggish waters are so strongwith alkali that you only dip the most hopelessly soiled gar me tit iuto thorn onco or tv ice, wring it out, it will be found clean ns if it had been through your ablest washerwoman'* bauds.— While we camped there our laundry ' work waa easy. Wo lied the week’s washing at tho steru of our boat-, and sailed a quarter of mi Jo, and the job wne complete, all to tlie wrindnc out. If wethrew iho water on our heads und £ravothem a rub or so, the white lather would pile up lliMO inches high. The water is not good for bruised pin oca iuid abrasions of the skin. We bad a valuable dog. He had raw placet on him. He h:id tnriJ'O raw places on him than sound ones. lie was tho rawest dog I almost ever saw. He jumped overboard one day to get away.vfrom tb€ flies. But it was bad judgment. In his condition, it would liavo bcou just as comfortable to jump into the fire- The alkali water nippod him iti all the raw places simultaneously, and ho struck out ior shore with considerable interest. He yelped and barked and howled ns he went, and by the time ho got to I he shove there was no bark in him—lor ho had barkedaished a nico American hotel clerk, who was crusty and disobliging, and didn't kuow anything about tho timc-uibles, or the railroad routes—or—any thing and was proud of it—I would not wish for a move desirable boarding house.Half » dozen little mountain brooks flow into Mono Lako, but not a stream of any kiod flown out of it. It neither rises nor falls, apparently, jind what itdocs with its Surplus Wivtcr ia a dark midbloody mystery. All the rivers of Nevada sink into the earth mysteriously after they have run one hundred miles or so—none of them flow to the sen. as is the fashion nf rivers in all other lands.There* arc* only two ^eusouii iu this ro-giou around about Mono Luke-—and these arc, the breaking up of winter and the beginning of the nest. More than once I have ficou a perfectly blistering morning open with fclic thrrrmunctor at ninety degrees at eight o'clock, and nee then biiow fall fourteen inches deep, and that same identical thermometer go down to forty-four degrees under sholtcr boforo flijt o'clock nt night. Under favorable circuuistatiCds it snows at lenst onco in every month iu the year, in the little town of Mono. So uncertain is the climate in iu miner that a lady who goes out visiting cannot hope to be prepared for emergencies unless she takes her liiu under ouo arm and her snow shoes under the other. When .they have a -li/lx of July procession ii generally snows or. them, and they do say that, as a general thing, when a man Cftlls for ft brandy toddy then:, the barkeeper chops it off with a hatchet and wraps it up io a pf‘Pcr Hke maple sugar. And it jp. further reported that tho old soakers haven't any teeth—vrore them out by eating pa-cocktaila and brandy-punches. I don't indcrso that statement ; I aimply give it lor vhut it is worth, and it is worth, woll, I should say, million?, lo any man who oan bothe bark all out of his iMido, a«lt;l tlw-if withu'uts,.rililliu,. himiolf. itut■■llarvnt/VP IVlH A Aftli/lil I Ik^k l^knb All w .alkali water had cleaned the bark all off his outs id 2, and be probably wished bo had never embarked in sny such enterprise. Ilf! ran. round and round in n. circle, oml pawed the earth aud clawedthe air, mill threw doublo siimrocrBcto.soiuetiines backwards and sometimes forwards, in the most frantic and extraordinary manner. He was not a demonstrative dog, as a general thing, but rather^f a grave and hcrious turn ofYu ill d. uud I never saw hi in take aoI do Julyindorso the snow on tlie 4th because 1 know that to be true.ofmiich iuloicat iu anything boforo. Ho (flu ally struck out over the jiiountaius, at a gait vliich we estimated at about two hundred *nd fifty miles itx hour, and he is going yet. This was about five years ago. Wc look for what is left of him along here every day.A white man cannot drink Lho water of Mono Lake, for it is Dearly pure ley. It is said that the Indians in the vicinity drink it sometimes though. It is not improbable, fur they are among the purest lints I ever saw. | There will be qo additional charge fur this joke, except to pirties requiring an explanation of it- This joke has received high commendation from some of the ablest minds of the ai;c. Horace G roc ley remarked to a friend Of mine thn£ if ho were ever to raakc a joke like that, lie would not dosjre to live auy longer.]There are no fish jn Mono Lake—uo frogs, no snakes, uo poift wogs—nothing, iu tact, that goes io make liie desirable. Millions j£ wild duck.i or sea-gull* swhn about the snrlhon, hut uo living thing exists unde:' the aurlace, except a white, firitbery u11 r-i” worm, one-half an inch Jong, wliicl; looks like x bit »f white tli vend fit yen out at the sides. Jf youdip u)i ft of ’.v:*ler vou v.-5:1 tlftboui hi*.eon thousand L'! srivc tlie wali-r a ort ;»i•these. «nrayUh-i Hey i biteappearance. Thun ihure is a fly, which looks M’UV'thing like ouv house fly.— Tb'.-rC settle on thj bcsich to eat the wnmiR il.itt wash ashore; auy time you can ?ec there a belt of flics an inch deep and six feet wide, and this belt extends
Newspaper Details
Dixon Telegraph and Herald
Dixon, Illinois, US
Thu, Dec 16, 1869
Page 6
Full Page
Clipped by
Dean T.
USA 30 Nov 2022
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