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The Gremlins'll Git You If You Don't Watch Out!By Peter EdsonThis piece will tell you about the Gremlins and the Fifinellas, the Widets and the Flipper-tygibbets.You never heard of them? Then read carefully.First there were the Gremlins. British pilots of the RAF saw them. Gremlins are only a few inches tall. They have horns growing out of a triangular face. And a little spiked tail. They can't fly but they wear tiny black vacuum cup boots that enable them to walk on the ceiling and walls, or even stand on the wings of a dive bomber as it goes screeching toward its target at 400 or 500 miles an hour.Every British pilot has his personal Gremlins. Airmen will sit at tea or at beer and talk about their Gremlins by the hour.- Where Gremlins came from originally, nobody knows, nor who saw them first. But right after the war broke out, young lads of the RAF began to see Gremlins dancing on their plane wings as they flew off to Germany with their loads of bombs, or they would find Gremlins in their pockets, or upsetting their beer at mess.Gradually the stories about the Gremlins began to grow until, today, they constitute an amazing and fabulous folklore of flying. British pilots going out to Libya, the near east, India or Australia have found that their Gremlins went along, so Gremlins are now practically all over the world.The Gremlins are not nazis. Oh! definitely not! And they are not bad, either Just mischievous. For instance, Gremlins like to jam the triggers on machine guns. When a pilot has to bail out, the Gremlins like to keep the parachute from opening. Gremlins like to fray strands in control cables, and jump up anddown on struts till they weaken then* to the breaking point. Gremlins also like to break sections of the transparent cowling, so that pilots and bombers catch cold.FULL OF TRICKSGremlins like to crawl inside cylinder heads and foul the spark plugs. Or^get inside the recess of a retractable landing ^ear, and just when the pilot gets ready to land, the Gremlins will brace their feet against the wheel to keep it from being lowered, so that the pilot will have to open his throttle, circle the field and come back to make a crash landing. WThen Gremlins behave like this, you have to talk to them and explain very patiently that they musn’t do things like that again. Gremlins can be trained. There are even good Gremlins.From incidents like these, you begin to see why the Gremlins came into being. They are a psychological letdown for young pilots, to relieve them from the greatest, most concentrated nervous strain known to man. Gremlins are something to help a young birdman explain away his troubles and laugh about them. They are a change of subject from this gruesome business of war. Gremlins are fun. But if you want to get pedantic or didactic or psychiatric about them, you canMjr that the Gremlins are one ol the greatestpsychological allies the United Nations can possibly have.For instance. Suppose a young flier comes in from a job with a few bullet holes in his wings. He has had tough going on this mission and been straffed plenty. He doesn't w’ant to report to his filght mechanic that he was hit, that he maneuvered his plane badly, that he didn't see the enemy that got him. That would be bad for his own morale. The human element must be considered. Young pilots must be kept relaxed and self-assured.So, when the airman comes back with a hole or two in his wings, he is apt to talk to his mechanic something like this:“Sergeant, I'm afraid one of my Gremlins is up to a new trick. While I was out over Sidi Barrani after that convoy. I saw the Gremlin walk out on the wing there. A moment later I noticed he had a brace and bit and was boring a hole through the wing. Frightfully sorry! I spoke to him on the way back, and he’s promised not to do it again. Cheerio!”And that’s that.AS TO THE LADIES!Gremlins are all males. As the legends grew and the observation of the life and habits of the Gremlins became more scientific, it was discovered there were female of the species. But the femals are Fifinellas. A Fifinella is rare indeed, being a good bit like a queen bee. The males all seek her out, but she is very elusive, proud and haughty as s queen should be. Baby Gremlins are known as Widgets and a baby Fifinella is a Flippertygibbet. The story goes on from there.My authority on Gremlins tells me that there are now Gremlins in the United States. This is strictly in confidence, but on a boat recently arrived in America from England, a Fifinella stowed away in the captain’s cabin. There were a number of Gremlins on board, too, and when they found out about the Fifinella!It was the principal topic of conversation all the way across. Anyway, this Fifinella is now in Canada at an RAF training school, and it’s probable that more will be heard from her later.There are also reports that a Gremlin stowed away on Jimmy Doolittle's plane that bombed Tokyo, riding a bomb to earth and jumping off just before the explosion. The fliers who know about this say that the Gremlin had every intention of seeking out an oriental Fifinella, to win her over to our side, and for other purposes. Think of all the damage that could be done to Jap aviation if the oriental Gremlins could be set to playing tricks on the Jap pilots. Reports on the success of this expedition are eagerly awaited, but probably can’t be brought out till the next raid.Let you know about it just as soon as Ihear.LOGICALMany birds migrate northward instead ofsouth. They go north toward the equator after thir nesting season in the southern hemisphere.
Newspaper Details
Racine Journal Times
Racine, Wisconsin, US
Tue, May 26, 1942
Page 6
Full Page
Clipped by
Hayner P.
IL, USA 12 Oct 2019
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