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Readers' ForumMonster, Frightened by Humans, Gives UpGbutte vekmcfl Utter* an ithjedt ot ftwril tater«rt Trbtch 0 oat Axlt;«ed 15# 1b lertKttx. All lottert matt kair*** bat •IrnntTTro* will N wttbbeli *t til* 'irritor** rmw1Editor Gazette:To: Flarnex IV, SecretaryMartian Hiking and Space Faxrol C’tubCaarex. Llandeth. Mars.Sir:This is to inform you of my resignation from r.he Martian Hiking and Space Patrol Club. Though you will probably not believe them, here are my reasons:As an intelligent Martian, I always have believed that ours is the only inhabited planet Imagine my horror and surprise to discover otherwise.Several days ago. I landed my ship on the third planet to do a little hiking and perhaps bring back some specimens of the flora.- I landed an a small hill and got out. making certain to release the protective gases so the noxious air of this world could not reach me.As I left my craft, seven * things loomed up before me. I was terror stricken. Each of them had two appendages in front of them and stood on two others. They had only one head apiece with two wide eyes, one nose and a mouth filled with sharp, pointy teeth. Instead of our chain mail, they were covered with some sort cf cloth. They also had hair—imagine! One of them held an auxiliary eye in its hand with which it looked at me. They began uttering shrill animal cries and one of them leaped into the air. They definitely were not friendly. I leaped back into my craft and got Aw ay as quickly as possible.You may consider this a. crank letter, but I shall never go back there again. My doctor says my heart will not stand another such shock. Please accept my resignation and forward the remainder of my membership duea.Mars ’ Grablex IIEditor Gazette:Flash! Braxton County monster tentatively identified by Roane County Democrats as Republican Gubernatorial Candidate Rush D. Holt beating Braxton County brush for votes.Spencer —DemocratsEditor Gazette:For centuries I have known that it was unfair and unethical to appease one's own egotism, and [ shouldn't have done what I did, but no matter bow learned or advanced one becomes, he has just a little touch of the “devilish in himself to fight with. I. being no exception, just couldn’t resist the opportunity to get myself in The Gazette group picture during my recent visit to your fair meadows.With what materials I had at hand I was able to make a quick one the knees, humanly unobserved puse and have my likeness recorded nn your fiim. That same ‘devil spoken of heretoforeimpelled me, at a weak moment, to steal a Gazette from the Heaters vicinity/ I just couldn't wait to see how the picture was going to turn out. And since it turned out so well. I just couldn’t turn down the chance to have it pointed out to a host of people.tn the picture in the upper left hand corner of Page 16 of The Gazette for Monday, Sept. 15, you will find ray likeness located just to the right of the only tree and directly above the head of the smallest one of the earth group. I had intended a profile shot, but turned my head at the last moment so that the results would show a frontal view and the mail armor on my right arm.Heater* —The Braxion Mon*t*rEditor Gazette: -Shucks, that waru’t no monster them folks seen and smelled up there at Sutton. I think It wai one of the Barium Reduction Co. employes a-prowling in the woods.South Charleston. —Georg* TaylorEditor Gazette:Your paper and reporters are to be commended again and again for upholding what is right.It seems the wishes of the people don’t matter when it comes to putting out money for the park or on voting machines. After the past several months it certainly looks like we need the voting machines above anything else.You have the means for getting our voice heard. Can't you work on that issue more?Help the people to get what they voted for. City —Mrs. L. L. Kesaell^ ■—-- ...... * i iEditor Gazette:I don’t knock anyone, but I believe in boosting anyone who does his work as well as the advertising . manager for your paper.I mailed an ad in Logan on Saturday and was surprised to find it in my Charleston Gazette on my porch at 6 a. m. Monday. Service like that is wonderful and deserves a medal.Three cheers for your paper.Logan —Mrs. Otie SuiterIntercepted MessageSept. 20, 1952Dear John:. We’rQ counting on those machines you ordered yesterday to do a better job than tha machines used last Primary.Yours,%2£jiqJL.J. M Slack. Jr. County Court, City.
Newspaper Details
Charleston Gazette
Charleston, West Virginia, US
Sat, Sep 20, 1952
Page 4
Full Page
Clipped by
Jeff H.
NA, 07 Jul 2023
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