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Winnipeg Free Press Newspaper Archives Aug 29 2015, Page 2

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Winnipeg Free Press (Newspaper) - August 29, 2015, Winnipeg, Manitoba C M Y K PAGE A2 964 REGENT AVE. W. SPECIAL SALES HOTLINE 1- 800- 616- 6551 OPEN 24 HOURS www . vickarchevrolet. ca ( Including Winnipeg) FOR ADDITIONAL SAVINGS OVER AND ABOVE WHAT YOU SEE! “ LIKE” US ON & FOLLOW US ON V O L UM E D EA LE R IN C ANA D A # 1 2012 & 201 4 Dealer Permit # 9714 HOURS MON TUES 8: 30AM - 9: 00PM WED - SAT 8: 30AM - 6: 00PM Contact Kevin Parkes Your Vickar Credit Specialist 1- 800- 361- 1368 Online at: yourapprovedauto. ca DON’T FORGET TO ASK ABOUT: • $ 1000 Canadian Forces Rebate • $ 1000 New to Canada Rebate ( No Credit required) • $ 500 Student Bonus • Upto$ 1500 GM Loyalty EXCLUSIVE TO VICKAR!! Example of Finance: $ 18,000 at 3.99% apr. over 60 months = cost of borrowing $ 1,911. All prices and payments are plus taxes. All pricing in payments include lowest GM loyalty discount. 2015 Cruze lease at 48mo term, 20,000km/ yr. First payment due at signing. Over mileage @ 0.16/ km. Sunroof & Pioneer Stereo! Full power group touchscreen radio. HURRY IN FOR BEST SELECTION! LEASE FOR 2015 CHEVY CRUZE LT EST STK.# FC2123 WIFI ENABLED VEHICLE 1 Available 2015 Chevy Trax What a Deal! Power windows and doors, Bluetooth, USB port, and WiFi. hevy # FT0215 C WIFI ENABLED VEHICLE ort, $ 18,925* $ 49 / WK* 0% FOR 84 MO. 2 Available 2015 Chevy FC7455 Camaro LT Not the Camaro everyone else is advertising! Full power group, 19” wheels, touch screen radio, Bluetooth with audio streaming, power seats, fog lights, sunroof and premium sound! CASH PRICE 1 Available SUNROOF SUNROOF $ 28,949* $ 89 / WK* 0% FOR 84 MO. CASH PRICE $ 19,995* $ 76 / WK* 0% FOR 84 MO. CASH PRICE 2015 Chevy Equinox LS Manitoba’s Largest Equinox Dealer! Over 150 to choose from. Don’t miss your chance to take advantage of this incredible offer. # FT2480 WIFI ENABLED VEHICLE est ose 1 Available $ 22,667* $ 69 / WK* 0% FOR 84 MO. 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TODAY 8: 30AM - 6: 00PM MONDAY 8: 30AM - 9: 00PM STK.# FC7455 ONLY 2DAYS LEFT! ONL ONLY 2DAY S L E F T ! OVER 900 VEHICLES ELIGIBLE FOR 0% TO CHOOSE FROM 2015 CHEVY 284 SILVERADO DBL CAB LS WINNIPEG FREE PRESS 1355 Mountain Avenue Winnipeg, Manitoba, R2X 3B6 Privacy policy and questions www. winnipegfreepress. com/ privacy. html CIRCULATION INQUIRIES MISSING OR INCOMPLETE PAPER? Call or email before 11 a. m. weekdays or noon Saturday City / 204- 697- 7001 Outside Winnipeg / 1- 800- 542- 8900 press 1 6: 30 a. m. - 5 p. m. M- F. 7 a. m. - noon Saturday Closed Sunday fpcirc@ freepress. mb. ca TO SUBSCRIBE — 204- 697- 7001 Out of Winnipeg — 1- 800- 542- 8900 ADVERTISING Classified ( M- F) — 204- 697- 7100 wfpclass@ freepress. mb. ca Obituaries ( Sun- Fri) — 204- 697- 7384 Display Advertising — 204- 697- 7122 FP. Advertising@ freepress. mb. ca EDITORIAL Newsroom 204- 697- 7301 News tip 204- 697- 7292 Fax 204- 697- 7412 Photo desk 204- 697- 7304 Sports desk 204- 697- 7285 Business news 204- 697- 7301 PHOTO REPRINTS — 204- 697- 7063 City desk / City. desk@ freepress. mb. ca Letters to the editor / Letters@ freepress. mb. ca WATCH: Where are they now? Winnipeg’s defeated mayoral candidates . TODAY ON WINNIPEGFREEPRESS. COM READER SERVICE / GENERAL INQUIRIES 204- 697- 7000 ¥ A 2 SATURDAY, AUGUST 29, 2015 winnipegfreepress. com Arts & Life E 1 Business B 6 Books D 21 Careers B 14 Classified C 14 Comics E 9, F 9 Community Voices A 19 Diversions D 18,19 Editorial/ letters A 14 49.8 D 1 Horoscope E 4 Homes G 1 Jumble C 14 Miss Lonelyhearts E 4 Movies E 8 Sports C 1 Think- Tank A 15 Travel F 1 TV C 16 Weather C 17 . OBITUARIES A 32 Due to a change in policy by Western Canada Lotteries Corp., winning lottery numbers are not available by press time. Sunday’s paper will have both Friday’s Lotto Max and today’s 6/ 49 winning numbers. Tuesday, Sept. 15, will be Winnipeg Free Press Bonus Days to Saturday- only and Thursday, Friday, Saturday subscribers. LOTTERIES BONUS DAY INSIDE CANADA POST SALES AGREEMENT NO. 0563595 Recycled newsprint is used in the production of the newspaper. Please recycle. Men’s sense of smell just stinks I N case you haven’t noticed, there is something magical in the air, and I’m not talking about mosquitoes the size of canned hams. It is either the intoxicating aroma of yet another moody Manitoba summer drawing to a close, or the stupefying stench emanating from the spoiled Chinese food leftovers that have been sitting at the back of my fridge for the last two months. I personally can’t tell the difference between the two. There is a legitimate scientific reason for this inability to sense scents — I am a ( bad word) guy. For the record, I started pondering this divisive gender issue the other day when I stumbled on a fascinating online article from Prevention , the healthy lifestyles magazine. Entitled Five Things Your Body Odour Says About You , it pointed out all humans, even those with excellent personal hygiene, emit a unique odour. “ Even when no one thinks you smell, you smell,” the article chirped. “ And scientists who study volatile organic compounds ( VOCs) have long known that every person has a distinct odour, just like they have distinct fingerprints. Some scientists call it your ‘ odourprint.’ ” The thrust of this article was that each person’s “ odourprint” can influence their health and relationships in five important ways: 1) It could make you a mosquito magnet; 2) It could find you a love connection; 3) It tattles when you’re stressed; 4) It makes you friends ( or loses them); 5) It speaks volumes about your health. This smells like the truth to me, but it is absolutely meaningless when it comes to a certain segment of modern society, which, for the purposes of today’s column, we will call “ men.” As much as I hate making sweeping generalizations, it is a scientific fact women have been blessed by nature with an uncanny ability to detect scent particles at the sub- atomic level. You will know this is true if you have seen that annoying TV commercial for the air- freshening product Febreze wherein a mother enters her teenage son’s room, is rendered unconscious by the horrific stench, then forces the kid at gunpoint to spray everything with Febreze before two of his friends of the extreme opposite sex stop by for a visit. At my house, I begin almost every day by wandering over to my wife, who is a woman, holding my hands in the air and asking: “ Honey, does this golf shirt smell OK?” Which will cause my wife to inhale deeply, scrunch her face in deep concentration, then either give me the thumbs- up or order me to immediately incinerate the offending article of clothing. It is a different story with guys of my gender. The portions of the brain and the nasal cavity responsible for detecting powerful aromas are destroyed very early in our life cycle. This is partly because many young guys spend a great deal of time with their heads buried inside old gym or hockey bags, which give off stench molecules so overpowering they are visible to the naked eye and should be illegal under the Geneva Convention. The end result is young guys end up oblivious to their own body odour, not to mention the eye- watering aroma emanating from their friends. If anything, guys take great personal pride in the fact they smell like an old sweat sock buried under a chicken coop on a really hot day. If, for instance, a group of typical teenage guys were standing outside a slaughterhouse, the workers would be the first ones to complain about the stench coming from outside. Any remaining ability I personally had to detect even the most potent fragrance was burned away after spending dozens of years as the owner of basset hounds, the only animal known to give off an aroma more pungent than a teenage boy. There is also the fact guys, in their formative years, will go exceedingly long stretches of time without bathing, until it reaches the point where their mother threatens to take them to the zoo to meet their “ real parents.” Eventually, thanks to powerful hormones, guys reach a point where it dawns on them there are worse things in life than willingly standing next to a person of the opposite sex. Scientists refer to this as the “ Cologne Stage” of a man’s development, because it is the point he realizes if he wants to be irresistible to women, he will have to drench his entire body in gallons of cologne. When we were young, my buddies and I would slather our bodies with something called Jovan Musk Oil, which had the following two effects: 1) It made us invisible to women because we were cloaked in a dense fog of musk molecules; and 2) It caused women to run away because exposure to a cloud of musk is like having bear repellent sprayed directly into your eyes. So, yes, the scientists are correct — bad body odour says a lot about you. It says you are a guy and should change your shirt before leaving the house. At least that’s what my wife tells me. doug. speirs@ freepress. mb. ca In the Doug House Doug Speirs One too many gym bags has a lot to do with it A_ 02_ Aug- 29- 15_ FP_ 01. indd A2 8/ 28/ 15 9: 36: 22 PM

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