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Ohio Cincinnati Weekly Times Newspaper Archives Jul 24 1884, Page 1

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Cincinnati Weekly Times (Newspaper) - July 24, 1884, Cincinnati, Ohio Vol. XLI. Xo. 30.OIXCIIVXXTI, THUnSDXY, JULY S4, 1884. #1 Uei- Year. Bfystprlon. Warm calms of henven oVrbrood the earth; OnsceiiU‘<l swar<I my feet are prcascU; Spring breezes luaLe melo*lions lulrtb. Yet silent awe pervades iny breast; To-day by Nature 1 am sliown Her marvellous eleineuU alone. 1 linger where the daisies throng. With golden disk on supple stem, And cnrelehs of tiu ir beauty, long To unveil the impulse guidiua them; And wood ringly inv soul receives The resurroctious of the leaves. 1 ean not praise the emerald meads. Where pamp of lengthening clover peers, Mor that green railluiice of ilie reeds That cleave the ntnrsh witli slender spears. My reverent heed alone 1 give The miracle that has made them live. Those blossoming trees whence odor floats, The full-fed rivnlet’s joy intense. The cHiKtnlic trillftrom featliered throats, Fierre mo witli strange l>uu ildermeuta. In all things lorcly f would guesa The mystery of their loveliueiu. But while 1 muse, the westering day ^ Drops from the horizon's damask aln The pastoril] ui-tunces turn grav; New mvstcry deepens everywhere. And high niglit brings, released from thrall. The uiigntiebl mvstery of all. -[Kdgar Fawcett. MOTES ANI> NEWS.VINCENT’S RECOMPENSE. BT W. J. L. Benjamin Franklin was one of the expert ■winimers of liis day. The alligator killiu.; season is now at its keiglit in Louisiana. Now the Chicago barteiuler puis in a substitute and sails I'or Europe. Southern railroads are more generally prosjierous tlian ever before. Since the dog.rirowning season opened in New York 1,335 canines bnve breathed their last. Wisconsin’s countjcss spring lakes are frequented by guests fruui us far South as New Orleans. An English firm of manufacturers sends a package of soap to every child whose birth is aniionnced in the Ixmdon Times. A Chinese gambler dieil at Portland, Oregon, last wfok, leaving $15,000 in bank and a will providing for a gorgeous funeral in the old country. Lucky Senator Jones, of Nevada, has found another fortune. He is one of the rare men who can get “broke” and become a millionaire again. >1. Julos Ferry’s recent severe indisposition, from which he hasbaiipily recovered, is altributcd by hims<ilf to “loo many ioed drinks,” a coiuplaiut that is chronic in this country. Tbe Austro-Germ.m-Uussian-Itallan alliance could muster an army of 10,000,000 men, tboroughly srined and drilled. The ariny of the United States numbers 25,000, the navy about 8,000. A San Frunoisco man had a model wife whom he loved so inucli that he transferred all lUH fortune to her. 8lie immediately be-rnine a shrew and a tennagunt, and finally drove the poor man out of tin* bouse. The Irieiids of the late Chnnder Sen, of India, carry about the piece -of carpet on which he used to sit, and liaiig it in a con-apicuuus place in their services. It is quite dusty and worth about 50 cents. The most influential man in Dodge City is said to be Batt Mattcrson, who has killed thirty-two imrsons, according to common fiune. and is s|>oken cf as a “sociable, good fellow, when ho isn’t crossed.” Boston bus a man w ho lias gone mad, according to the rxplarintioii offered by a friend, through makifig a chart of tbe marriage relations of popular actors, and then trying to correct it lor piihhcation. Owing to the molcstutioii which King Tawliiao has receivotl from the crowds of Idlers who surround him when ho walks through Iioiidnii streets he is now aocom-ptinicd by two policemen wherever be goas. Mrs. (Quincy Hliiiw, who has spent $30,-OOOHiiiinaiiy in miiintaiiiiiig kindergartens in Boston, lias Iwen obliged to close them in ennscqiienco of. shrinkage In the rail-road bonds in which her fortune is invested. Mr. Dudley Buck, of Brooklyn, tbe composer, has coinp«»sod a letter to the Yale College anthonties declining their degree of Doctor of .Music, and expressing the opinion that Aniericgji colleges can not confer such a dcgreo. The Turtle Mountain District of Dakota Islieing hugely “Iwoined” as one of Nature’s gardens. The “boomers” say It baa coal eiioii^li to wiu m tin* world. Immense furcHls of timber, and )iiistnru lands oa;gi-ble ul buppurting countless herds of cuttle. The snininer’s aport at Block Island U snoriltishiiig. Frequently tho gome sbowa fight, and in aueli cases tho excitement is inleiiHC. The swurdtish caught in those waters weigli from ‘jno to fiUO pounds, and the s\\(IIUs are tVuin two to three foot in h'ligth. A QtieU'c nicehanlo the other day Btet |N<d u|Miii a nail, w hich plorcod the sole of Ilia bout and ran into liis foot. Tbe nail w IIS a new one and cKoin, and bo thought nothing of tiie injiiiy, I'Ul in two days be IcH iMiic lame iind was laid up, and on tbe eighth (Iny lie dital of lockjaw. Tho City of Bamberg i* first to pracUoally apply tho law against the puhli(^ disturbance of plan'' playing at untimely hours In the etiM! (d a cirl w ho, gi cally to tbe annoy-an(*c of the nelghlMirs, practiced at an open window. The code prescribes a fine or ad-equiitc Imprisonment. Tbe municipal court let the fair culprit off with a dollar and tosu. Wrec'ketl Mwnliood. Victims of youthful Indiscretions spffcr lug from nervous debility, lack of self-con fidcnce, IniPatred memory, and kindred symptoms, shoukl send tbrée hdter stamps for large Illustrated trvsUse, giving means of (?crtsin cure, with numerous lestlroo-nials. Address tv oiId's Dispcnsafjr Mad teal AsaociailoB, Buffalo, N. Y. * “The test of friendship is self-sacrifice. He wlio for his comrade’s happiness will not lay down his own—ay, and do it uhcerful'.y, uucoinplaining-ly, with no blazoning of the circumstance from the house-tops—has but little real claim to the sacred dcmoni-nationof ‘friend.’” The words were Vincent Romuey’s own. lie was i-oading, with a strange sense of a dual consciousness, an essay of his salad days which had been compiled in a sudden access of literary fervor, and sent to half a dozen hard-hearted (or liard-headcd) maga* zine editors in turn. It liad come back, |K)litcly, and even affectionatelv, decliiKHi by all, had found shelter in a rarely-disturbed drawer of an old bureau for several years, and at last had reappeared to fiullfil its mission. That mission was to present in a compact, concrete form an idea wliich had been fioating in a nebulous condition in Vincent Itoniucy’s mind for weeks, if not months. He read the high-flown sentiments of his one bid for literal^ fame over and over again, as thuugli tho koy to some enigma were there and might escajie any but the most patient and microscopic scrutiny. Ultimately he tossed the dingy* and dislignrcd manuscript back into its corner with something between a sigh and a groan, iv»?c from liis seat, and began pacing the narrow parlor in a mood sadly at variance with the bright July sunshine which was fl(HHling the Holbury landseaiie wiiliout, and would also have made this room a very palace of the en»'hantcr but for Mrs. Cringle’s solicitude for the glories of her carpets and curtains. “Making practice square with precept has always been an awkwaifl task in this world, I supiMise,” lie so-likyiuiscd bitterly. “I fancy there have been a good many failures in that line up to now. 1 didn’t think that paragraph yonder was ever going to haw a diroot and individual lUca. sage lor me—for its writer! BuLit is so. I scribbled it jauntily enough. I recollect the very day and hour. And 1 believed then every sjilahlc I put upon the pniMu*. Tho question is, do I now believe them ? And am I prcjiared to act up to llic conviction ?” He paused both in his molologue and in his slow turning to and fro on the line of frayed oilcloth. He was regarding, half whimsically, the full length jwrtrait of himself that confronted him in the opposite mirror. He beheld there a tall,well built young fellow of perhaps six and twenty, with features that would have passed as handsome even with a jury of fastidious critics of his own sex. He was noting, sardonically, tho look of haggard unhappiness those features now wore, and the incipient storm curve across his brow. “It’s about time a decision was readied one way or the other,” lie continued, “or else my city friends will think counti7 air very detrimental to the complexion, and—I’ll stand by my own assertion ; I’ll make the sacrifice, lioger shall have the battle in liisown liands.” The resolution to which Vincent Roniney had so painrnlly attained was a Quixotic one. With the whole strength of a noble nature he loved Gertrude Wynn. And up to the beginning of the past May he had hoped that his passion was on the fair read to be recipixicated. Then Vincent’s oldest and dearest friend, Roger Burring, had come back from a lengthened stay at a Gorman university, and apparently had signalized liis return by falling Iicadlong in love with tho same young lady. If Vincent had taken him earlier into confidence it might have been difl’creni; he might have resisted tho temptation. But now it w’ould have lieen amusing, if to theohsoiwer the situation hud been less serious, to see with what innocent abandonment Roger sought (ier-tnidc’s society to the exclusion of liis elder from that gracious presence. And watching tlie pregrcss of this idyl day by day, Vincent had arrived at tlic dctcrniinatidn of a self-ubiietraling aurrendcr. He    was hel|)od to the conclusión by tlie knowledge that Ida friend was richer than idmscir, and in the eyes ot local wiseacres a better match. Even for iiertrnde’s sake it might be well tliat |io_Vincent, should withdraw. Yos; withdraw was the word. To stay in Holbury and suffer keen pangs fruin the continual and omphusized i*ccoUeclion of his loss, was more tlian even Vincent’s philosophy ctmid brace Itself to bear. Luckilv (in one sense) ho bad no special homo ties to hamper bis footsteps. Ho would wander, aeo tho world, very jiossibly turn colonist and sctllo for life on an Australian sheep farm. In action— tho excitomcut of abnndant and nipid change—must lie tlie euro for his incl ancholy. Hod not Ids father, for the offcnie oft mcaallitnce, been cut oíT with the proverbial sidlliug by old 8<iulro Romncy, of Holbury Manor, how different the prosiicct might have bcon 1 But to repine waa vain, and would not disposaesa hii couaiu of tho family acrot. Vincent made precipitate arrange-monta fur hU i>ro|K>sed exodus, and waa at flrai nJuded to foriake Uol bury without any formal farewell of the maiden who had won his licart. But on reflection it seemed that an atmosphere of meanness, of cowardice, must of necessity linger about such a flight. To avoid this he snatched an liour from the inevitable business of packing, on the eve of departure, for a visit to Derby Villa. “And you are going to America— at once! You have kept your intentions a secret even frem—” “me,” tlie girl was about to add, but instinctively she changed the monosyllabic to “us.” Gertrude looked more beautiful than over, Vinceut tliought, with the sbv, startled surprise, stealing the color from her countenance and replacing the first smile oí welcome with an indefinite expression of alarm and-was it possible ?—of pain. Queenly of figure, lovely of feature, with cultured tastes ami disposition sweet and gracious, Gqrtrude Wynn was a bri(ie worthy of a prince in more than one man’s opinion. “I certainly owe you ati aiwlogy for so abrupt an announcement. Miss Wynn,” Vincent stammered, feeling his courap sadly deeertiug him, “but in truth the decision was taken in some haste, and I have naturally had many exceedingly prosaim matters to attend to since. I hope you will forgive me.” “Of course I can understand the preoccupation,” Gertrude answered, “but ’’and there she hesitated. IjOVC is a bold and faithful diviner, and Vincent correctly translated the maiden’s thought. “You do not see the reason for my journey?” he said. A great wave of crimson went up to the i*oots of Gertrude’s auburn hair and ebbed anew with equal fickleness. Her dreamy blue eyes momentarily met her lover s and then fell. It was a crisis in two lives, when a single word of vibrating manly passion might have prevented weeks and months of anxiety. But the word was not sixiken, and Gertrude slowly and spasmodically continued; “That is scarcely forme to suggest, Mr. Roniney,” she said. “To attempt it would be an impertinence.” “Pardon! Tliat woi-d can never be linked with Mtss Wynn’s name,” miir-mnrcd Vincent in a tone of subdued galiaiurjr. The girl acknowledged the compliment by a curt littlo bow. By a mighty eflort she had regained at jeast her outward equanimity. Only in lier voice was there still a lingering tone of agitation. ’Thank you,” she said with some hauteur. “And to return to the subject matter of our discussion, Miss Wynn, I am actually leaving Holbury to-morrow, and when I may see the dear old village again—if ever—it is impossible to say. 1 have come to wish you good-by.” Mechanically she suffered him to lake her cold,nervele8s fingers into his tight grasp; mechanically she echoed his “farewell.” And then Vincent Romney was descending the steps on to tho lawn, lifting liu hat with an easy, familiar gesture, and all the sunshine died out ot Gertrude Wyuu’s bkv. * ’ ♦ ♦ * “Tliere, you’re better now; it was a severe blow, but yon will soon come round completely, and be none the worse, I iiupc. What name did you say?” “Itomuey—Vincent Romncy.” “Not of Holburv, in Westsliirc, England?” “Yes.. I was not born there, it is true, but my father was, and I have livetl there myself for several years.” “At Holbury Manor, I supiioso.” “No, that ” “All I ‘xactly. I recollect perfectly; there was an untortunate family difference, and old Squire Romncy—obstinate old mail he was—practically outlawed his son—left his estate to a strengcr. I quite reincnibcr the circumstances. No, no, my dear sir, you niusn’t talk any more this alter-iiooii, please. 1 want to see you entirely convalewieiit before you cither exert or excite yourself. When yon are well enough call at No. 9(i Eit-teenth avenue, if you’re minded for a chat over old days.” And tho voluble little physician skipped briskly awav into another lepartniciit of tho accident ward. The conversutiuii had taken place in a New York hospital. Fortune semned to bo frowning on Vincent Bonincy in a variety of ways. He had lost the inheritance which should liglitfiilly have Ix'cii his own. Hu had been-so he sup|iosed—supplanted ill the afiections of tho dearest girl on earth. And now no sooner liad he landed on a at range shore than iiliysical disaster had overtaken him. lie had hccn knocked down in one of tho most crowded New York thoroughfare* by a runaway oab horse. At first it was feared that his in-juricH included eontiisiun ofthe brain, lint this proved an error, and by the latest niedieal rei>ort u few liours’ rest and quiet would probably restore the patient to full vigor. The world is not so wiuo after all. How frequently in this era of stcan. and electricity thii truth is prartic-ally taught I Here, among his Western coiiHina, almost the first iierson with whom Vincent Romncy liad liccn brought into close personal contact proved to be of English birth, a native of Viiiceiit’fl own county aiui village. Without the least unnecessary die-lay Vincent avtUed himself of Dr. Mtplfi’fl olieery iuviUtiou. “And so yon are reallv my old ft'ieud Hasting Romney’s son! I begin to see the likeness now, especially when your face is in profile. Ah! it was an awkward thing for your tatlier to be disiiilierltcd. I hoiiod the ^uire Avonld think better of liis passion ; but, as I said before, he was terribly self-willed. I fear the (luar-rel hastened your father’s death.” “It did. He only survived my grendfathcr three years.” “And his narrow income—pardon my inquisitiveness—is now your own ?” “All at present I am proprietor of.” “Just so. I left Holbury in the very year of the old Squire’s decease, and came to America. I well remember going to the manor sale the week liefore I quitted tho village. I bixiught a trifling memento away with me. That inkstand yonder was your giwndfather’s.” Vincent’s eyes followed the gesture of his companion’s finger across the luxuriously furnished apartment. On a table in a i*ecess stood a carved ebony desk ornament of antique workmanship. “May I look at it?” Vincent asked. “Certainly! With the greatest pleasure.” In another instant Vincent was inspecting the relic of liis proud .and vindictive grandparent. “I liave seen one very much like tliis—with a paneled jicdcstal of tlie same design precisely—in a friend’s house in London,” the young man remarked. “Frank Norrclls picked it up at some store in Wardour street, and he vows lie had a bargain. I’m never so lucky when 1 go bric-a-brac hunting.” “No doubt its age would make it valuable.” “Yes; and in my friend’s ornament yon touch a spring and the panel slides back. There is a hidden aperture bcliind. Is it so here?” • “I can not sa.v, I am sure. I have rarely used the toy. And a surgeon’s time is too precious to spend on gratuitous and useless experiments. Hall! Hall! But we .can quickly decide the point.” An cxaniiiuation with a strong magnifying glass followed. Click I Back shot tlie center division of the tested panel, and a dusty secret receptacle was in truth revealed. It was not empty! “What is this? ‘Ijast will and testament of Philip Romney!”’ read Dr. Maple, in a startled, biewildercd tone. Then he clapiHjtl astonished liatencr on the ITack. “It was not as we and everybody thought, after all,” he said; “your grandfather did justice at last, in spite of hi? anger. By this document —so strangely hiddbn and so unexpectedly discovered—the manor is yours, as your fatlicr’s successor; let me with all my heart congratulate you, Mr. Romney.” A further scrutinv, comparison of names and dates, sifting of evidence of one kind and another, left no ground for reasonable doubt. Vincent was indeed the heir to the alienated family estate. In a fortnight and three days he was again in England. And the'flrst honie-iicws that saluted his ears was that his friend, Roger Berriiig, was mamed. Tho event had come about very suddenly, and had surprised inaii.v. “I hojic he will be happy,” gasped Vincent. “Ay, the Icddy’s rich, and maybe that’ll help him,” replied the gossip. Now Gertrude Wynn’s i«*osi»ccts of a large dowry had always been understood as duhious in tho extreme. Here was a fresh mystci*y. “Rich! Miss Wyiiii— “Roger Boning hasna married Miss Wynn, Mr. Romncy. His wife, as is now, was some Lancashire lady—a friend of Miss Wynn’s, folk say.” A novel diniucss touchetl Vincent’s eyes. The relief of this av'velatioii was so great as to almostlstun him. He only felt tliat liis pulses were madly beating as with a fl<k)d of new life. His sacrifice had beeff needless, tlicii! Yet not without ^ recompense.    ] *    *    *    * I a “And yon were as dear to me wlicii yoii left—that dull dav—as now, Vincent,” ruby lips murmured, after a certain iiievitablo question hud received its answer, “money could not IKisslbly make any difl’eromaj in my regard for you.” “I am very grateful, dearest,” Vincent softly replied. Somehow the young squire of IIoI-bury lias never told tiis w ifa tiie roni-pl(!tc liistory of his strungfly recovered iiihoi ilance. Tlio rcaxgii^ for bis Quixotic flight she knows but in part. But from tliat loving, faU|iful licart lie has no other seeroU | Fortune TiUlliig. Will he come thU veer—will he roitif tli<’ ucxtV W III liecume U>-<layr Hhn llfhliy blew "    reii ll|Mtb(! Uiioilo.tiuwn, Whlaperlna, tell me—oh, tell me irticl «tore he love me eelD No iloubl, In liur Imert Uiu meltlen kiiuw ; 1 hlelle-donn, thuUe.Uowu, icii we truel K«>r every maid la ths wide world kimwi That iwesl, iura prophecy. Pol|r «IrcW Her linio nmulh luto ruMohud ahape, «aylna, oh, thltll«.d«wa, tell me Irnel V^ hs lovM yon well. Oh. ha Iovm vou well I When will he C'lmet He will .mtr tvdny I 1 hla la the niiiwer ths thlelle-down Ulvos to her heart, as it fliss away. Ijook 1^ each ollier*a syes, and aav. “A p^hst trus is ths llusUs-dow.” —iCarlapall’crry. «»*»■ frrahieas and vU uswer.’”    ^ “Wslls’ Health Ks- THE STAGE PROMPTER. His Manifold Dutioaand Some of His Perplexities.    , [Boeton Ulobe.] “Taking it easy now, eh ?” said a reporter to a stage prompter, whom he chanced to meet on Saturdaj*. “Oil, yes;the houses arc nearly all closed for the suniiner, and I’ve nothing to do until September. Wliat am I going to do? Well, I’m just going down to a quiet little place I know of down in Maine, and take a good two months’ lay ofl’.” “Say, do you know that pcojilc have but little idea about your occu-patiou? Why, t lie re’s lots of theatergoers who hardly know that there is sucli a person as a stage prompter.” “Well, I don’t know about that, but I know that a good iiianv think it’s a ’soft job,’and that there's notliing to do but stand behind the flies and prompt an artist occasionally. Tliey never were more mibtakcirin their live».” “I suppose so. But is it really so hard?” “Hard? why, there isn’t a person oil tlic stage or off wlio has to jiav such assiduous attention to every detail of the play. Why, you see, we have to follow the piece, line for line and word for word. We must watch every motion of tlio players. If an actor makes the least ’stumble’ tlie prompter must fully anticijiate it and pass him the needed word before tbe audience can detect any break. If an actress begins to look apjiealingly to Hie audience tlie prompter sees that she is stuck and at once gives her the required cue.” “You must have to get pretty familiar with a play before ever it goes upon tbe boards. “Familiar? I siiould say so. I have to commence with tlie rehearsal and distribute their respective parts to the inciiibers of the eonipaiiy. Then, while rehearsals arc on, ujy time is occupied in writing out fJic parts, for the cliaiigcs of scene, to guide the stage carjiciiters. Besides this I must make out a list of properties, ward robe for tho supers and ten thousand and one little things that have to be supplied for every new play.” “I sujiposc you have plenty of an-noyaticos from the stage people sometimes?” JJeUum have. iiSswrlda aw- ateurs, I'm Iiappy to say, but there is now and then a ’professional’ who is too fresh for any use. If there is anything I dread it is trying to steer a debutante through a first night. Sonic of tliem, of course, get through all riglit, but otliers ^et so worked up over the mortal tear of making a break that, once on tlic stage, if they happen to lose a w ord, they get so nervous tliat they can hardly rejieat what the prompter gives them. Then, again, wc are bullicred not a little by ladies of tiie company continually running to the prompter’s corner to get a glance at the prompt-book. Ot course there is a rule against lounging there, but somehow tho ladies manage to ignore it: and, to tcH Uic truth, the prompter uou’t feci like ordering a pretty woman away.” “The prompter seems to be quite an imnortaut individual to tlic eum-paiiy- “Yes, when lie imsts a notice on the eall-board in the green-room for a rehearsal,era notification of salary dav, he is about tho most imi>ortaiit person to be tound. He is tlien surrounded by the members of the com^ pany and asked no end of quest ions, 'i'he leading man may be a great favorite with tbe ladies, but there arc times whch be has to take a back seal for the prompter.” Cadjr Biauioii’a Daugliier. [Lunilon Letter. 1 The nninber of Amuricun ladies in Ix>ndon society steadily increases, but it is not often that American gentlc-tncii allow so gifted a lady to wed in England as the one I am aliuut to mention. This is Mrs. Stanton-Hlatch, a daughter of the distln-giiislKHl Elizab(!th Cady Stanton, of New York. This lady, recently married to a gentleman of BaHiiigstokc, made her first apiM!urnii(;o in liondoii last Saturday as a public siieaker. it was at a tea meeting held to proiiiole the HuceoHH of Mr. Woodal’s uiiieiid-iiient to tbe GladHtoiie Fruiieliise Bill ill favor of w’oiiiHii sull'rage. I’rofessor 11 tinier, Mrs. Ashton Dilke and oilier uraetned sjieakcrs bad addressed the large and fashion-able uudiuticc, when this girlish and lovely young wife arose and for alniut twenty iniiiules held the audience eiitruneed as if by some strain of niusic. Her voi(;u is at once pathetic and sympalbetic; )i(>r look faruwuy, as of one dreaming dreams of a fairer future; her thought both poetic and clear;her ninnner childlike in sini-|ilielly. A careful critic who beard It said: J’Hiieli a speerb as that comes from a long distance.” From infancy tliis lady has known ill tho honie of lier parents how much patient work, devotion, thought, cii-tiiusiaim, may bo given to a oauso. bhe his also bi'cn ti*aitied by hearing iicr eloquent mother—the only woman wlio ever recalled to me the felicities ot Emcrauu’fl stylo iu suoakiiig to an audience. All tlieso havo gone to produce the exquisite spoooh of Mn. Slantoii-Ulatrh. No doubt, now that her volco hit boou hoard, abo will be much souglit for by the leaders of tlie woman suffrage movement, but it is probable that she will not find it of much utility to leave her pleasant home for such service, for in a few days now the said movement will have passed it crisis, and the women of England will cither have the snfli age or they may bid farewell to it for a century at least. The new franchise bill will admit to vote 2,(KX).000 of laborers, nearly all ignorant, more than half of them unable to read or write. There is an advancing generation wiio arc being educated in the new public schools, but they have not been waited for. From Grt'ciilaiia's ley Mountains. fPclroit Fiic Frciw.j Yesterday afternoon, on the balcony of the Russell House, a reporter was introduced to Herr Eric Gaubes-Irc, a gentlcmart from Godfhaab, Greenland, who stopped for a day’s rest while on liis way home, after liaving gone overland to Sitka, Alaska, thence by boat to ’Frisco, etc. “You find it rather warm,” veil tured tlie reporter as a feeler. “Yes, but not as hot as it was one or two hours in Denver last week.” “Do you prefer-” “Now let me tell you something about my country before you ask it, for I've met you people before and I know your racket. (See bow easy 1 get oil to your American slang?) Greenland is an island frozen tightly to the north pole. It is cbiefiy settled by Grcoulaiiilers, witli a sprinkling of Danes, Swedes and Norwegians and now and then a Scotclinian. Our country is the recipient of an annuity from Denmark, and we have liflecii or sixteen colonies of Danes in the country. There arc in Godtbaab— sabe? about    Danes    and 200 Swedes. Our business is almost wholly fisliing and furs. We c.xport whale and seal oil, skins of seal, fox and reJndcer and eider down by tho car load.” “Do yon have railroads?” “No, but wc would have ’em if we could use ’em. Our imports are wheat, liquors, tobacco, coffee, sugar and firewood. Then we do a little in the production of walrus and white bear teeth and liidcs, and when it comes to game, we’ve got grouse, teal, jilover, jxiriioise and narwhals.” “What’s a narwhal ?”üsii.    liffi rrr^ you something about our schools. They’re not iinrncrous, but we’ve got as many as wc need and cun stip-iMirt.” Entiiieiil NdveliHts. rFlilladelphia Bulletin.] A literary journal recently asked its readers to send in a slip containing the names of tlie six most eminent living novelists. Three hundred and eighteen votes were received, with the following result; William p. HowoiU........................... TB William ninck................................ 78 Hvn"V Jame*» ................................. 81 Hvorgo W fable.............................. 4a Wilkie follina ................................ 81 Jnllan llawtliorno........................ ... 27 Tills may be accepted, i>orhaps, as the average novel-readeris estimate of conteniiiorarv ivritcre of Tiction, and it is somewliat reassuring, considering the amount of ti*asli that has a wide circulation, to find no name among the six which does not represent the better work of the time, al-tbough even the best work of any of tliesc novelists can hanlly be entitled to iKP'inanent popularity. It is somewhat surprising, piM’liaps, to not find two names oniittiHi which are destined, in the opinions of the best critics, to bo long reiiienibercd, but tbe |Hipular coiiteiiiporurv verdict on literary mutters is notoriously Inade-((iiste. And this aecounts for the omission of Short bouse, the author of “John Inglesant,” and of Blackmore, the author of *’lA>rna Dooiic,” from the list cited above. “Il'h l.Mi-se.'' iTfxafl SIftliiiri.J Shortage and shrinkage are polite substitiites for theft. Wticn an educated Boston young lady entered a public ball, slio exclaimed:    “Ob, dear, what a dreadful odor of car-buretted hydrogen ?’’ ’’Mum?” said tbe janitor, with a piiz/.led eouuteiiauce. "Tbe smell of carburetted liydro-geii,” she (explained. “That’s no kind of gin, niniii,” replied the ianitor; “that’s gui-be;tbe pijie is leaky, mum.” Tliere are a great many public lii-slitiitioiis about wbieh there is a suspicious odor, suggestive of ’’soiiie-tbiiig rotten in luuiinuk.” There is a leak somewhere, but it is iiioro refined to call it eurburelled hydrogen than plain “garsc.” KolUI ('ointl)rt. Rvoryono likes to take snlul comfort and It may Is' oiij tyed bv everyone who Khliiey-Wurt In the bouse and takes a few doses at the first syniptoins of an attark of malaria, rhetiiuiUisin, biliuusimsM, laun-Uioeor anyafluetim ofthe liver, klUiiujs or bowels. It Is a purely vegetable emn-pound of roots, leaves and berries known to havo tpt'clal value la kidney troubles. Added to these are remoUlea aeiiiig directly oil the liver and IkiwcIs. It removes tbe cause of disease and foi tilivs tbe system against iievr aiisoks. Ab. Pbillips, proprietor of rhillips’ Opera House, Uicbmont, luU., is dead, Isavlng a iortuiie of |lOO,T*iO. If yon sr« fsltlng, lirukrn, worn out snd nrrv OUS.UM "Wails’ Usslib llsBSWtr." fl. PruggwtA In a Tff—ry. Othello—fs she not on tm lajro—on nest, mv lord? Oihciio—On nem, sy, on nest. J'’”'-    I know. Othello—hat doat thou think* l«IC>—Think, my lord? Othello—    Think, my lorOt My heaven, he erhoea me. As If there were some monster in the coop. Too hideous to be shown-Thou dost mesa sumctliluK. 1 heard ihce say but now—thou IJk’dst not that. As though thv breakfast egg was stale, or had l*«en flst ii|ion; -\n<i wlien I told tiijo she waa of my brood The choicest layer of a thousand hens, the cried’st ‘•Indeo<l!’’ An one woulu say he had a Cochin hen Could Inv nn egg with her, for money. Mhow me the hen. lago—1 dare be sr on that she i* on nest. Othello—Well, go to, then. Like to the Fonticfc 8o«, Whose icy current and compulsive course Ne er feels retiring ebii, but keeps due on. Even BO a setting hen will set. And set, und set, and set. On bureun knobs snd tx>itle necks and corks. And will not scratch around and lay fresb eggs. Till something hatch. I have lied Ndl strings to their tails, and doused Odd water on them, and have scared them. And chaaed thani nuind tlie yard, niiit set pH' k bsrruiN over (hem, but set thev Will. I will withilruw To furnish me with somo swift means of death Íor the old hen. Ay, ay; and by yan’d marbls hen veil I will B«ll her ill thc'markct For a squub. —(Burlington Hawkeye. CLRUENT FfN. The Inner man—a convict In jail* —[Drake’s Trav. Mug. Tbe law of harvest Is to reap moro tlian you sow, but the rule of the bachelor is to rip more tliaii lie sews. —[Graphic. “Poulct a rivoire” is French bill of fare for a restaurant dish. In this country “jioulcts a la rublier slioe” would be Icsn jxictical but far more frutlifiil.-[Graphic. A scientific journal di.sciisses “eggs as food.” Tills sfrikcs us a.s being a rather sensible idea and productive of imicb more good tliau discussing eggs as bouquefs.—[Oil City Blizzanl. “Siam is the place where there are neither Jcw.s nor swine,” said a person to a Rotlisdiild oikíc. “IiidcKíd,” was fbo reply. "Ix't us go and exhibit ourselves there.”-[Jewish Messenger. It is a great mistake fur a woman to jitmp out of the window u\>on tluk IignprikflfflpHpmh of a burfclar. luuld alivays shout “cholera,” and (xiver her bead up with bedclothes. —[C’ornincrcial Advertiser. Some one claims to have discovered < that rliloroforin will cure cholera. We should think it migliL It has been known to cure poverty and dis-apimintnicnt in love, and these are more stublMirn maladies thau cholera. —[Norristown Herald. The diamonds w*orn by Patti in tho hall In “La Travlata” are worth over ||JÜ0,0(X). Fogg says a bawl scene in bis family never produced auytbing more costly than a thrco-dollar set of Cambridge diamonds, but then some men a.re not so hard-licarted as Fogg. —[Boston Transcript. Political potpio is seldom catcii by the ujqK'r crust.—If you live iu the city don’t cry over spilt milk. Examine it closely and you may find it is not milk afferall. —Excessive economy often makes a miser of a mean mail. As it is now the height of tbe ice cream season penurious swains will do well to paste this on their IKH'ketbooks.—[New York Journal. The latest story on John Stetson U to the cfl’ect that be quarreled with his agent, Harry Sharp, last week, because lie observed that a sign had txMMi bung out ill front of the theater annuiiiicing “Matinee to-day at 2 o’cbx'k sharp.” Mr. Stetson angrily exiMistulutetl with bis agent. “You are only my representative,” said he, “and you have no right to advertise yourself at my exixmse. Takedown that sign and liavc it changed to 'Matinee to-day at 2 o’clock. Stetson !’ ”—[Chicago News. Twciiijr-Flvo IVr i'cnl Mtronirer than Miijr Othnr Hut ter Color. Bi'Ki.iNOTttK, Vt., .May 3, 1882. 1 bcrcby certify Uutt I bave examined tbe Butter Color preiwrod by WeIN, llicb-ai'dson A Co., and tÜMt tbu samo Is free Ironi nlkidi or anv otlwr itul»<»taiKM> injur-iniH to boaltb; that I bava co iipared it uittiHomeof tbe bent ul ih, oth-r Butter ( olor» ill tbe nmrket iiiid tiiid It to Im more than tweiity.tive p r rent strou^er in oolor thuii tbe liest of itia otiicrs. I am satistled that it is not liable to lie-come iiiiieUI, or in any way to iniure the blitter. I have exasiinvd It afu>r two inontbs* free expoaure to tlie air In a place iiuide to large uliiiiiveito|^cni|K>riitnre, aud found no l uee of r^tOilnity, while otbei kinds himiiarly ex;>o«iMl tK‘cinne raneid, A. II. Sahin, I’rof. Chemistry, LlmsarsUy of Veriiioal. KiiMktl m*4 Y«*i M» Notbjr. p hli uifu JuiiriiNl.] Tlicre never was a ]K>Iltioal IhjU §o limited in extent that made *o much noise a* the bolt against Blaine. Neither was there ever a ¡Militical bolt HO absolutely witboul reason, and HU destitute of an intelligible cause iu tho mimlsof thinking and patriotio men.    _ Rvt'ry dav sdds to the arrnt amount of evideiioo ss to ib« curative powcn of Hood’s Sarssparills. Lntters sre < ontln-uully tx'lnir received from all sections of ibo country, telllttic of beaeita derived from tbie great medicine. It le uiiequaled for irenersi debility, aud aea bioou puriffer, (•X|ielliug every trace of scrofula or other Impurity. Now Is the time to take II. Made by I. Hood A Co., Lowell, Maae. hold by all dnigflsU.

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