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Lock Haven Express (Newspaper) - February 3, 1890, Lock Haven, Pennsylvania oeitttija EIGHTH YEAR-NO. 285. LOCK HAVEN, PA., MONDAY, FEBRUARY 3, 1890. PRICE-TWO CENTS, EVENING EXPRESS KINSI.OK BKOTHEKS---FUBLISHKU8 THE RKPUBMCAN CITY TICKET. City Treasurer Urafius carried every ward in the city for the Republican nom nation for City Treasurer at the primary elections on Saturday night, which, the way, were more largely attended than auy in the history of Lock Haven, This waB mainly due to the earnest contest between Beardaley and Grafius for the nomination. The latter Is now serving his second term as Treasurer, and the Republicans have shown their appreciation of his excellent record by nominating him for the third time. This is a high compliment to Mr. Grafius, and doubly so when the fact is taken into consideration that his opponent for the nomination, Mr, John T. Beardsley, is one of the most popular ^Republicans in the city. The latter has many warm friends who would like to have seen him secure the nomina tion. but as the majority has decided otherwise, they will no doubt bow gracefully to this decision and work faithfully for the success of the whole Republican ticket. By persuing such a course they place their favorite in a strong position for preference at a future time. Joseph Grafius has made a model City Treasurer, and one of the very beat that Lock Haven has ever had. The Republ cans recognized this fact at the primaries Saturday night by renominating him, and the tax-payers will ratify their action at the polls on the 13th of this moot1!, public servant who has performed his duty so faithfully during the past four years as has Mr. Grafius, should be retained in officii. He has conducted the office for the best interests of the city and the tax-payers, irrespective of party, should see to it that he is kept where he is. In private affairs no business man would think of dismissing an employe that had intelligently and faithfully performed his duties. It would be the beighth of folly to do so. The same rule should ap ply to public matters, aod especially in municipal affairs, where faithful service to the city's interests should be the control! ing idea in electing municipal offioers, The nominations for ward offices are general1 y acceptable, and those for City Council and School Director will command the hearty support of the Republicans, and also of many Democrats. The nomination of ex-Mayor Jefferis for Councilman in the First- ward is an excellent one and he should be elected by a good majority, is men like Mr. Jefferis that are needed in Council, and the First ward Republicans are fortunate in baring a candidate as popular as James Jefferis. He served two terms as Mayor of the city, has lived here for years, and is thoroughly ac quainted with the needs of Lock Haven. It is important to the taxpayers that such men should be sent to concll, therefore see that he is elected. The Republicans of the Second ward, the mercantile ward of the city, also selected an excellent'nominee for Council, in the person of Mr. J. Schuyler, Jr., the proprietor of the Fallon House, and the owner of other valuable real estate. He is one of the heaviest tax payers in the ward, and has served a term in Council He made one of the most efficient Councilman the ward ever had, and his friends will see that he is elected again. Energetic and progressive business men like Mr. Schuyler make first-class Councilmen, and that is the kind that Lock Haven is very much in^need of juBt now. In the Third ward the Republicans only nominated a candidate for the short term for Council, and Mr. David Mosser Was named for the position. He is well known to the voters of the ward, is an upright and hard-working man, and as the manager of Kistler's extensive tannery for many years has gained the confidence and esteem of the people generally. No nomination was made for the long term. The Democrats nominated Mr. Wilson Kistltr, and the Republicans were wise in not naming a candidate against him. 31 r. Kistler has been identified with the business interests of Lock Haven for many years, and for several years past has taken an active part in advancing the industrial interests of our city as a leading member of the Board of Trade. He wilt look closely after the welfare of the city, and the voters of the Third ward do themselves honor in sending such a man to represent them in Council. In this ward the Democrats made no nomination for Alderm-tn, and the Republican candidate, John W. Harris, Esq., will be re-elected without opposition. Ho has served for several years, and has made one of the most efficient Alderman in the city. The voters of the Third ward know this and propose to retain him in office. The nomineo for Council io the Fourth ward is Mr. Samuel Fulton, one of the oldest residents and best known men in the ward. He should command a large vote, and especially from the labonug men, being a hard working man himself; lie is honorable and straightforward in all his dealings, and for years has enjoyed the reputation of being a first-class carpenter and millwright. The candidates for School Directors are all good men. The nominees are as follows: A. J. Schuyler, First ward; S. Z. Martin and J. W. Webb, Second ward; G. L. Morloek, Third ward, aud G. T. Michaels, Fourth ward. Messrs. Martin, Morloek and Michaels are renomiuations, and all three have made excellent Directors. REED TELLS HIS STORY Carlisle Has Furnished Many Precedents for the Speaker's Action. bills passed without a quorum The Statement of Cnriule that There la >" Precedent Refuted By the Speaker, who Shows that the Present Position of the Majority Is the Law of the Lain!, anil nsi io Followed by the Ex-Speaker. Washington, Feb. 2.-Speaker Reed to-day made to a representative of the Associated Press the following statement concerning the "Uopuhlican position iu the present great controversy: "Mr. Carl'sle was entirely right when ho said in sub stance that the decision of the Uouso that a quorum was constituted to do business when a majority of tho Uouso was present, would change from tho foundation the method of doing business. It certainly will do so, for it will enable the majority elected by tho people to rule by their own votes and not by the sufferance of the minority. Tho rule of the majority is at the very base of our government. If it be not the true rule our faith is vain, and we are yet in our sins. Look at the practical working of the other doctrine. The Republicans have a majority of seven, but they have only three over a quornm, -ICS is our number, 1G4 is a quorum. Are we to furnish a quorum, with the whole Democratic party sitting idly bj? A hundred and forty luBty Democrats Bit silent in their seats doing no public duty except to draw their pay. It is possible that the United States is paying these gentlemen $13 a day without even the poor privilege of counting their silent forms. carlisle called down. "Carlisle says there is no precedent for the division of the House. I have personally seen and heard him furnish one a hundred times. I have heard him declare the number SO for and 20 agaiust, mathematically less than a quorum, and yet declare the bill passed and then sign that bill, thereby certifying under tho most solemn sanction of his oath of ofik-o that the bill had properly and constitutionally passed the House. How would ha have done this if his doctrine be true that a quorum must vote? Understand me-day after day Carlisle, in ray presence, has declared that such a bill had votes for aud against by his own count as Speaker less a quorum, and has immediately declared it passed and has signed it, thus furnish ing the only proof the President could have that it was passed. How could this be except on the plain ground that if a quorum did not vote the preseuco of a quorum was enough. tue doctrine upheld. But this matter does not need argument. In Carlisle's own state, in Ohio, in Massachusetts, and in the courts everywhere, as you may see by Butterworth's speech, the doctrine just upheld by the House is the law of the land, and it ought to be, if good government is not to perish from the earth. Not a ruling has beeu made in the House, or suppressed tillibus-tering which has not the full sanction of parliamentary law that men should resUt, on!y shows bow ingrained thu wrong course has become, and how necessary tho remedy. bat is the House trying to do? Why, to perform its highest function? That of deciding the right of a member to his seat. Until 18S2 no man dared to filibuster against such a case. No man ought to be allowed to do it to-day, yet every day three hours are wasted in approving tho journal when fivo minutes would bo ample. These three hours belong to tho public business. Tho people do not under-tand that every wanton roll CitU consumes three quarters of an hour. TALK about HULKS. 'Some of those men are talking about rules. They arc now acting uoder a body of rules, which the American people use in thoir assemblies. A body of rules well known and understood by all those who are not wilfully ignorant. When wo first came hero the obstructionists declared they would dio in the last ditch against my rulings. They did not approvo of, ud now they are wanting to die at Ther-nopaylao in defence of tho liberties of their country, because we don't force rules on them. If they could bo fewer deaths at Thermopaylae and more business in tho House the country would bo better off. It ia true that tho Democratic leaders like Carlisle have long since ceased to participate in the defersco of good government, t they should now make themselves heard sffirmativoly on the sido of order." MILS. COPPINGER I>l ..J>. Tho Fourth Itereavemeni in the Blaine Family lu h Little Over a Month. Washington. Feb. 2.-Mrs, Coppinger Secretary Blaine's eldest daughter, died at her father's residence here at four o'clock this morning. Mrs. Coppinger was unconscious for hours before her death. This is the fourth bereavement in the family of Secretary Blaine within the past thirty-five days, and is the second one of his children to die within that time from illness brought on by attacks of the grip. Tho funeral will probably take place on Tuesday, from St. Matthews Roman Cath olic church, and the interment will be made in Oak Hill cemotory. Father Tom Sherman, son of General Sherman, is expected to conduct tho services. sketch OV her life. Mrs. Coppinger was the oldest daughter of Secretary Blaiuo, and the wife of Lieu tenaut Colonel John J. Coppinger, of the Eighteenth Infantry. She bad been ill since the death of her brother Walker, but it was ouly a few days ago that her condi tion became critical. During Mrs. Cop pinger's early girlhood she spent the reater portion of the time with her parents in Washington, attending school in a fitful fashion, as her health at that lime was far from strong. As she grew to womanhood the symptoms of delicate health seemed to pass away, and when she finally made her debut in Washington, after a long stay in tho invigorating Maine olimate, she was the personification of robust womanhood, and took a prominent part in all the social gatherings of that period. Colonel and Mrs. Coppinger were married in Washington in the Blaine residence on Dupoint Circle, February 6, 1882. Tho ceremony was performed by Rev. Dr, Chapolle in tho presence of a distinguished company,which included President Arthur md his Cabinet. At the time Colonel CoppiDger was stationed at Fort Leavenworth, hither ho took his bride. Nearly three years after, just on the ove of the Presidential nomination, when the Blaines ero agaiu living in Washington, on Lafayette square, opposite to their present residence, Mrs. Coppingor paid her pa-routfl a long visit. It was during this period that sho became a Catholic, as she had partly intended to do before her marriage, for her husband belonged to that church and fought in the Papal service. Tho popular belief in Washington attributes ill luck to tho house occupied by the Blaine family. It was there that the attempt was made to assassinate Secretary Seward, and tho afflictions which hefel subsequent occupants lent strength to the current tradition, which the troubles of tho Blaiue family will tend further to con* firm. A singular circumstance in connection with her illness was that Walker in his last hours, in delirium, mattered, "I am dying here and Alice is dying in New York." Mrs. Coppinger was thirty years of age, aod tho mother of two little boys. Ligt of Letters. The followiog is a list of uncalled tor lottors remaining in the Lock Haven post office for tho week euding February 1st, 1(3110. Those applying for lotterfl in this list will please say they are advertised aud g'wti date of tho Hat: Mrs. Clara Ad mis, Fritz Beyler (2), Johu Cauturcll, Houry Deany, Miss Ellet-Dean, W. J. Davis, John K. Falter, Kmit George, Georgo Harbst, C'has. German, Misri Clara Kudos, Miss Bertha Rimes, Mrs. r. Meek ley. Dr. Thomas M. Mcckley, a well known physician, died at his residence in Jersey Shore yesterday afiurunou, after a !�>tig illness. Dr. Meckley was fnrmeily a resi-at of this city au(\ had many -vanr. friends horo. Ho leaves a wife and tInee childreu. Ho was a veteran of the laiu and his military record was good. Tho funeral will take place Woduesday afternoon at 2 o'clock. What Nellie lily Will Slake. It is said that Nellie Bly will make at least $10,000 by her trip around the world for tho Now York World, besides the advantages she will reap in other ways from tho notoriety won by the performance. Tho World, which " paid the freight," expects to make somothing, or if it should ho nothing Pulitzer would pay or receive with almost equal willingness. As part of a grand scheme for fame extending through years, ho expects of course the pcrformauco will be a paying one. TOLD BY REPORTERS. All the Latest Local Events Ud to 2:30 P, M. Told in a Concise Manner. LATEST NEWS ABOUT THE CITY The Republican Primaries-The Wemther Sic1"*1*-Court Proceedings-Hri. Wll-lon'g Funeral-Ground Bos Day-February Coart-Wll! Locate at Kill Hell- Break Down. The Republican raters of tho city of Look Haven met at the respective polling places Saturday evening, and voted for delegates to the Republican City Convention which will be held this evening. The followiog are the delegates elected, all of whom are instructed to vote for Joseph Grafius for City Treasurer: First Ward-Adam Sohroat, George W. Tuokei, A. C. Pepperman, E. E. Ball, James Jefferis, James F. Till. Seoond Ward-A. L. Merrill, Adam Zeigler, K. D. Bdtcheler, John Welshags. W. A. Sloan. Third Ward-Jesse Merril, Henry Neen-er, John P. Wynne. George R. Rioker. Fourth Ward-Samuel Fulton, Frank Felmlee, AbiBh Heltman, E. T. Gallag-her. Following are the ward nominations First ward-Councilman,James Jefferis; School Director, A. J. Schuyler; Constable, Ellis Myers; Assessors, M. C. Lingle; Judge of Election, George Tucker; Inspector, L. M. Smale. Second ward-Council, J. Sohuyler, Jr. Alderman, Joseph Parsons; Sohool Direct-S. Z.Martin for 3 years, George W. Webb, 1 year; Constable, Robert Martin; Assessor, A. L. Merrill; Judge of Eleotion, J. N. Farnsworth; Inspector, W. A. Sloan. Third ward-Alderman, J. W. Harris; Councilman, David Mosser for 1 year. School Director, G. L. Morelock; Assessor, G. Kintzing; Judge of Election, Henry Keener; Inspector, George R. Kicker. Fourth ward-Council, Samuel Fulton; School Director, George T. Michaels; Alderman, Dr. A. R. Merrick; Constable, C. .Mogenlian; Assessor, Daniel Frank; Judge of Election, John Sohooley; Inspect' or, Joseph Paul. examined Miss Bly touching her mental condition at the time she waB Beeking release from an insane asylum, where she bad caused herself to be sent in order to personally investigate the workings of the institution. Their acquaintance began in this way, and their friendship was cemented by the energetic manner in whioh Dr, Ingraam insisted upon her sanity. AMEWS ON THE STAND Oar Bf any-Tinted Women. Do women powder ? Well, there are seventy-three tints listed by the beauty dealers. Not only is the complex carefully studied, but the dress is put on and the pulverized rice or French chalk actually matches the tint of the fabric. Of greens there are fourteen powders; twenty-five browns were compounded for the cinnamon, amber, almond and seal shades so very popular last season, and pink brocades, mauve tulles and yellow crepes all have their complementary tones in the beauty boxes. The Weather Elcnaln. This morning Messrs. Simon Bros, began agaiu to display the weather signals from the flag staff on top of their commercial building, on Main street, and they will continue to do so daily hereafter. The weather indications will be sent them by telegraph. The discontinuance of the display was on acoount of the fund appropriated for that purpose being exhausted, and it is to Messrs. Simons the public is indebted for having secured the order to have tho weather signals again displayed here. Sergeant Townsend, who hasobarge the State Weather Service, also used is influenoe in obtainiog the order from General Greely. of Court Proceeding!. At the adjourned session of court held on Saturday, February 1st, a petitiou was presented for the opening of a public road from Great Island bridge to Main street, Lock Haven. The viewers appointed by the Court are O. T. Noble, John W. Harris, and R. C. Quiggle. Another petition presented to the Court was for a County bridge over the river at Lock Haven. The Court appointed as viewers C. R. Noyes, R. M. Messimer, Warren Summerson, Jacob A. Bittner, Andrew White and Isaac Frantz. Punerale. The remains of Miss Hamburger, whose death occurred Saturday morning at the residence of her parents near Island, were brought to this city to-day for interment. The deceased was aged 18 years, and died of consumption. Ruth Ely. the infant child of Councilman William Ely, died at noon Saturday, aged 5 months, and was buried yesterday afternoon. Mo Use for Him There. Joe Blackburn, the Senator from Kentucky, one day last week asked a new Congressmen to join biro in a friendly drink at the bar. "I never drink," was the reply. "Well," insisted Joe, "take a cigar." "But I don't smoke." "Well, then why the -- did you come to Congress?"-Chicago Times. A Free Trip to Karope. John W. Crowley, a musician on the Fall River Line steamer Providence, of Fall River, Mass., guessed within a few seconds of Nellie Bly's time around the world, and has been notified that he is entitled to tho prize of a free trip to Europe. A Break Down. A front spring of the Fallon House omnibus broke as tho vehicle was coming up Main stroet to-day. The " bus " was filled with passengers at the time, but the team was stopped at once and fie gentlemen all walked to their destination. Brazine the Joints. Ed. Troxeil, the expert telephone lineman, has been at work for sometime brazing the joints of the electric light wires in this city. When Ed. gets throngh with the wires the lights will burn more smoothly than at present. Death of o Child, Carrie Kitchen, the five-year-old daughter of Mrs. Dora Kitchen, residing on Churoh street near the market house died yesterday morning. Funeral tomorrow afternoon at 2 o'clock. Services in the Baptist Churoh. Will l.ocutc nt Mill Ball. Dr. H. C. Liehontualor, of Larned, Kansas, will permanently locate in Mill Hull, Va., in about ton daya for practice of bis profession. His office wilt be at Mill Hull drug store aud his residence with Thoa. H. Mann until April 1st. Tho Doctor controls tho best practice in Larned, out bo comes Kast that ho may be with l;is fiiemis. Ik '.lie Democrats want a quorum in tho !ifusc at Wai-hin^tun liwy must olcct one. The 1'bilad-. Ipliia Inquirer thinks that ia tho moral to bo tliowu from the boated discussion brought about by Speaker Reed's decision in the matter. Mr*. Wilton's Funeral. Another of Look Haven'e old residents has been laid to rest. The funeral of Mrs. Nancy Wilson, widow of Asa Wilson, took place at 4 o'clock Saturday afternoon from the residence of Mrs. Mary B. Irvin, corner Bald Eagle and East Park streets. The services were conduoted by Rev. Wood, of St. l'aul'b Episcopal Church. A select choir of ladies from St. Paul's ohurch sweetly rendered a couple of selections during the services. The pall bearers were J. H. Laverty, E. A. gony, J. H. Fredericks, L. A. Scott, , W. Webb and W. A. Kinsloe- The interment was madein Highland cemetery. Ground Hoc Day. The light snow that covered the ground yesterday morning, led most peoplo to think that winter had set in for good in spite of the grouud hog not being able to see bis shadow. The sky was olouded all day, and the temperature gradully rose until eveniug whon a light rain began falling, and this morning the snow had almost entirely disappeared. If there ia any dependence to be placed in ground hog day, tho backbone of winter is broken if it had any backbone. Ii* Xelllo Bly to Marry? A dispatch fromLofiansport, (Ind.) Bays: Friouds of Dr. Frank Ingram, of New York city arc claiming to have hoard from roiiahlo sources that ho is bethrothed to Nollie Bly, the famous globe trotter. Dr. Ingram was born and roared here. He was one of the expert medical men who Stamping- the Old Man. I'll send my boy to boarding school." "What for?" "Oh, he asks suoh infernal questions. He wanted to know last night if a shoemaker oould breathe his last." February Court. The next term of Court begins on Monday Februnry 17th, and will continue two weeks. The trial of Charles Brown for the murder of William Lovett will come up at that time. BIGHT FROM KESOVO. Gives a Detailed Account of his Travels on the Day of the Murder. DECLARES THAT HE IS INNOCENT Admits Seeing Clara Price, Bat Denies all Knowledge or the Crime-His Wife also Testifies-Able Arguments-Col. Spang, ler Spoke this Morning for Over Three Honrs. Rekovo, Pa. Feb. 3, 1890. Charles Sodenberg, a young man about 22 years of age and fireman on the middle division, met with a sad accident Satnrday afternoon, which resulted in his death yesterday morning about 3 o'clock. He went to make a coupling for the front brakeman when near Sinnemahoning and got hiB arm badly crushed between the dead-woods, from whioh cause he bled to death. He was a young man of good habits and respected by all who knew him. Funeral Tuesday afternoon; services in the Zion Lutheran Church. Lewis Pierce, of the firm of Cross & Pierce, died suddenly on Saturday morning. He bad been suffering from nuralgia for two days before his death. On Saturday he became unconsoious and quietly passed away. He was about 30 years of ago and unmarried. Funeral tbis afternoon. Renovo is again without a policeman. The Chief of Police became intoxioated on Friday night and commenced to make arrests, shooting at a number of our citizens who made narrow escapes with their lives. Miss Mary Maloy, of Lancaster county, arrived here on Saturday evening to spend a few days with her mother, who has been aonflnod to her bed for a numberof months. Riohard aud William Jones returned home from Chatanooga, Tenn., Friday evening, where they had been attending the fuucral of their brother, Philip. Rev. J. D. Cook conduoted the funeral services of the late Thomas Collier at Westport yesterday afternoon. Bellefonte, Feb 1.-The interest in the Andrews trial reaobed the climax today. E. R. Chambers, junior counsel for the prisoner, outlined the defense to the court and jury this morning and then the testimony began. Edward Pooler and wife were called to testify that a ohicken bad been killed and oooked for Andrews' Sunday dinner, thus accounting for the blood on his shoes. Great interest prevailed when Andrews1 wife was called to the stand. She said Alfred left home on Nov. 27. She had prepared a chicken for the Sunday dinner bat Alfred was arrested before dinner time. Alfred had not owned a revolver for the last two years. The Saturday after the murder he wore his beat button shoes. When cross-examined by Judge Orvis she said she was married without a lioense to Alfred in Potter county by a 'Squire in March, 1887. She had been married to David Sharps In 1883 and had lived with him six months, when he scoured a divorce from her. The Tuesday morning that Alfred started from home, he wore a striped coat and trousers and the old shoes exhibited in court. He returned home Thursday. Andrews himself then took the stand, He said he came to Amerioa in 1885 and was 22 years old. He had lived a short time in several places and finally went to Brisbin. He then told the incidents of bis journey from the time he left home, on November 26, nntil he returned, on Thursday, November 28. His story in the main corresponded with that established by the majority o( the witnesses, but in two or three important particulars he disagreed with them. He testified that he saw a girl at one time, on November 27, ahead of him on the road, but be never got nearer to her than thirty rodB. About the time the murder was* committed he was lost in the woods, endeavoring to find his way out. He also denied having ottered certain words that were credited to him. He did not cut the sole off the left shoe until on bis way home on Wednesday afternoon. He did not know of any blood .on his clothes and what was on his clothes and what was on his shoes was certainly ohicken blood. When cross-examined by Judge Orvis be corrected his wife's testimony, and said he was married in Emporium, Cameron county. He did not know his wife was a Mrs. Sharp until after he bad married her. E. R. Chambers, for the defense, and District-Attorney Meyer, for the Commonwealth, each argued for an hour this afternoon. The arguments will be finished by Col. J. L. Spangler and Ex-Judge Orvis on Monday morning, when the case will go to the jury. A telephone message to the Express at 1:30 this afternoon states that Col, Spangler spoke for three hours this forenoon, and bad not concluded his argument when court adjourned at noon. Ex-Judge Orvis will have the dosing speech for the Commonwealth. Band and Orchestra. Hospitaller Commandery Knights Templar have engaged the Mountain City band and orchestra, of Altoona, to play for them during the meeting of the Grand Commandery in May. The Mountain City band is said to be one of the best bands in the State. Nellie Bly Will Lecture. Nellie Bly has engaged to deliver a series of forty leotures under the auspices of J. M. Hill, of New York, and will begin on February 9th. She will deliver one of them at Harrisburg. , PERSONAL PENCILINGS. N. T. Arnold, Esq., was admitted on Saturday, to praotice in the several courts of Clinton county. John G. Hess, of Superintendent West-fall's office, Williamsport, spent yesterday with Look Haven friendB. D. F. Good, the well known insurance agent, was among the guests at the Park Aotel, Williamsport, Saturday. John Consadine, Jr., olerk in Supervisor Brown's office, has gone to Hornellsville, N. IT., to spend a two weeks vacation. Mrs. Holmes and Mrs. McDermott, of this city, were oalled to Three Runs, Clearfield county, to-day by the serious illness of their mother. Miss Mame Armstrong has recovered from her illness and tbiB morning resumed her duties as teacher in the First ward school building. Charles Bowman Schroder has registered as a physician in this county and will practice his profession in Lock Haven. Mr. Schroeder is a graduate of Fennsyl-{vania University and of Lafayette College. CHAT BY THE WAV. Item! of I^cal and General Interest-Gath-ered by Our Reporters. Tin law la like a cobweb high. Its meshes must adorn it. It serves to catch the simple uy, And ne'er releases him till he's dry, But seldom holds a hornet. Gbumblixo about miserable roads continues. Sunlight has been Ienghtened out almost one hour. The grain fields are arrayed in living green. Shall we establish an Ice manufactory? As exchange says, blondes should wear yellow. They certainly do. Harry-Are yon singing in the ohoir now? Howard-No. I have joined the churoh. The Chinese always begin the new year by paying their debts. What a heathenish cuBtoml A chcbch fair phenomenon. The longer a man stays the shorter he gets. Taking whisky straight makes many a man crooked. A watchmaker belongs to the sell-tio race. A shoomakek calls his lap-stone honest confession, because It is good for the sole. That House Role is peculiar. - When a member's In his chair. Which controverts the actual And says he Isn't there. Spars the rod and-catch no fish. Many an actor begins with big billboards and ends with big board bills. The New York Sun does not believe there is too much love in this world, but it is satisfied there is too much of the following: There is too much bad temper. Too much scandle. To much evil thinking. Too rancb bard judgment. Too much importance. Too muoh weakness unforgiven. Too many bad puns. Too many courses at dinner. Too many ohestnuts. Too many women who support their husbands. Too many liars. Too many bores. Too many tiresome plays. Too many books written to sell and cot to read. Too many-no, there are not too many babies, and while there are plenty of babies and plenty of love, there will always be plenty of happiness in this world. Fresh shad and new onions are in market. The law permits a man to use bis wife to rob hisoredltora. Yet in tho face of this it is argued that marriaee is a failure. It is true that "when business ia dull is the time to advertise." Well, we have a little spaee at the disposal of our advertisers. All those who pass through the door of snocess will find it labelled "push." The man who bends his elbow too often soon becomes warped. This is straight. THK wood was damp and the feeble flame Was slow to make connections. So she added a little kerosene to the same And she went up to heaven In sections. NoTwiTHSTASDiNa it is midwinter, the maible trade has commenced and the game is In full favor with the boys. In this respect, the game has opened unusally early. What is wanted just now is. a blizzard that will bliz. The bank that all boys wish a ran on- the snow bank. Whether you have la grippe or not drop a capsule in the slot. In order to get the wild oats out of a boy he must be thrashed. With the exception of a few days this winter has been like a Waterbury watch- principally Spring. The late Adam Forepaugh was what thrifty Northern people oall forehanded. He left  great deal of money. Mat truthfully plead a pressing engagement-A lover who has planned to pass the evening with his betrothed. Said he "With love For you I'm smitten,: Give me your glove," He got the mitten. Speaking of the "one hundred beet books" a nicely edited bank book is certainly not without its merits. A fond father, watches closely the welfare of his daughter and insists on early hours, has arranged the oil lamps in the parlor so that the oil is exhausted at 10:30 m. Moat callers are quick to take the hint that when the lamps go oat they should do likewise, bat Mr. Longsitter, the other night, did not look at it that way. He only only edged op a litte closer and said he waa just going to blow the pesky things out, anyhow. What an unmarried woman doesn't know about bringing up children oould be written on the baokof a postage stamp, but it would ruin the stamp. Lovers who would avoid quarrels should never stroll in cross roads. When a young man ia fired by his best girl he surely doesn't go off In a blazo of glory. ;