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Lethbridge Herald Newspaper Archives

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Lethbridge Herald, The (Newspaper) - September 2, 1972, Lethbridge, Alberta -Saturday, 2, 1772 THE IETHMIDGI HEUUl 5 Alan Coren Oh, for a closer putt with Thee There on a busty lull it stooa, rooted: a gnarled thorn, lor money. Having craftily arranged of a high and imoerfect, and I shall send them out with their imper- might have said to the manufacturers on. It's just occurred and I shall give them timSumbied! the' world was not unlike a and water hazards, ded by the summer wind. Had you time on your hands, you might have gone closer: ali, you might have cried, a EtalJe of Charles Laughton raised by the Gerards Cross Victor Hugo Society! That fearsome hump, those twisted lees, that shoulder dropping tmnervingly to the knee, counter-pointing the movement of that horrible head as it wrenches unnaturally upward poking its pitiful eye at the uncaring stars, what could it be but the great hunchback himself, frozen forever by the sculptor s to wild expenditure, but what about progress? True, they had made the ball progressively smaller (for easier losability) with the unexpectedly profitable spin-off of (lie tee, which you now needed to put down in order that the tiny ball be hittable at all, but this wasn't big-league stuff, and hardly disturbed the accountants one digit. So they invented in 1851, the IS-hole game, with the result that the racked and abused bodies were totally incapable of getting home, after a game without first dragging of pure and endless light, as a matter of fact that I may have been doing God an injustice all this time. It was thinking of El Dorado which did it, if you're Interested in the creative process. tlie image of the True Good Life Of The Spirit? Isn't an eighteen-hole course something of a Pilgrim's Progress, an analogue of Man's travail and aspiration? Perfectabilily is held out, not because it is achievable, but merely because if is an ever-retreating grail to be striven for, and the good man is I shall chuck in a new obstacle, a harder hurdle. They will have days of joy, and days of despair, and each will test them in its own way, and from time to time I shall drop saints among (hem, Hogans and Nicklauses and tho like, to point the way and offer (he example, and the manufacturers shall be my interpreters, and the Royal and Ancient my Establishment from which all encyclicals issue, and the club professionals shall be my ministers and Man and Woman made from Man shall trudee the courses of the earth, good. I can't prove any of this, of course, any more than any oth- er divine: but it may just ba that the Fields of Elysium are, in fact, a wondrous golf course, without hazard and where the eternal day is free alike of cloud and crosswind. And we shall all be reborn with short rubber legs and slraight left arms and all those other things lu's golfswing, that's what; as indeed it was. The fact that the figure dis- played not a tremor of move- am thc large quantities corn- jt abo plete halt, in the paralyzed po- sition. Had some charitable Samari- who had not only been away from home for notcome by with liniment unaccountable hours but had scotch, it might have been returned mysteriously there still, already a topo- graphical conundrum fit to inrl Andrews in 1872, ladies' golf was born; or, rather, ladies' clubs, shoes, clothes, carts, urn- cd and just as myi soused, began to (urn (hings ranFwitn Stonehenge and the over in their minds. And, at SI. White Horse of Uffington, and a beacon for errant gliders. The first truth about the Game, as It is for some reason brellas, Upflasks and lessons, known, Is that if God had want- Everybody, in takes les. ed men to play golf He would sons; it being another truth have given them an elbowless about golf that, since it is an left arm short legs with side- unnatural activity to start with, hinged knees and a trapezo'd the player spends his life over- rib-cage from which jutted, at coming things the notion that Hght angles, a two-foot handicap is a mere numerologi- length of neck ending in a ball- cal talking-point is ludicrous: race garnished with three eyes, the entire game is shot through That He (in His infinite un- with, is based upoa, is con- wisdom, not realizing on the af- ceived in handicap, ternoon of the Fifth Day that I have little doubt that my Adam's descendants might one- son, should he follow tin's same day be in a position to putt for crazy-paved path, will be play- a first prize of large jng] a [ew years from now, on ones) did not, is the reason so a forty-hole course with a regu- many otherwise some citizens Royal and Ancient iron spend so much of their lives Daii chained lo Ills left leg and performing funny walks in a book balanced on his head, sandpils. Thc book will undoubledly be The second truth about golf caiied How to Improve Your Is that it was entirely con- swing. Ninety-eight per cent of ceived, created and developed the golf books produced by manufacturers, which ex- every year are called How to plains why it is that it can only jmprove Your Swing. It is also be played by first distorting the title of most of the articles the human body out of all de- cent recognition. The natural way to play golf would be to throw the ball down the fairway as far as possible, wriUcn in most of the maga- zines and of most of the strips drawn in most of the newspa- ers, Occasionally, some smart walk up to it, pick it up and (ool ,j.jes to steal a march on throw it again, and, having tne market by producing a reached the green, throw it [xxjk-article-strip entitled How down the hole, t0 perfect Your Swing; lie is, However, in some far and nn- jjj.e (Who played off specified eon, a turner with time cm his hands and inept! three, despite a club foot or, now I reflect, possibly because tude on his side came up with o[ since m a game golf a touch ol natural deformity you an edge of us) mad, bad, HOOK a stick which ended m a lump, and, rather than write the thing obabiy off as a tax-loss, decide to concoct a use for It. Ho then drew up a list of things you could not do (all golf rules are about not doing such as throw the ball, and an industry born, with a game as a sideline; and tho profitable possibilities were endless, provided you made the game difficult enough. To take an obvious example: with tho club at the prescribed height, the body is not only distorted, but incapable of natural move- ment unaided, except of a very limited order. of provided by ho.elJn The Voice Of One -By DR. FRANK S. MORIEY The peril of sports rrHt; United Chuich has issued a timely warning against. Hie bloated, inequit- able salaries paid athletes. Tlie popular, telling how every ethical norm is violated In pursuit of winning. Jack Scott, director of The Institute for the Study of Sports In able journal, "Christianity in tha Society at Oakland, Cal., says that football issue for August 11 asks, "Sport: Are We Overdoing Paul Weiss in "Sport: A Pliilosophical suggests that young men emphasize bodily exercise without similar emphasis on goodness and wisdom. Sargent Shriver, on the other hand, main- is the only sport in which religion plays a major role because is difficult for normal person to prepare for the level of violence you see on. the gridiron every He points to sports as a form of war, football employing itu'Etary met- tains that sport is a great community cat- aphors like alyst and true sports develop character. J "From Venezuela and the Ivory Coast, to Iran and Thailand, volunteers are teaching the universal language of sports." Billy Graham contends that "There are probably more really committed Christians in sports both collegiate and professional than in any other occupation in America." Sports build Christian character, says Graham. "The "field general." Discus thrower and Berk- eley sociologist Harry Edwards maintains, "All the evidence Indicates that U.S. sports do not do.velop Christian morals. In fact they undermine them. Take brotherly love. There is a sordid history of racism, dis- crimination, and the development of dual systems in organized American athletics. Does anyone think that the chess match Bible says leisure and lying around are between Spassky and Fischer will produco morally dangerous for us. Sports keep us brotherly love? Rhodesia is put out of busy, athletes you notice don't take drugs." Mike Crain practices "Karate for splitting 10 inches of concrete with his hand in demonstration of "God's power." The Fellowship of Cluristian Athletes or- ganized 15 years ago, has members of witnessing athlete evangelists. Billy Graham is on shaky ground when he calls St. Paul to support his enthusiasm for athletics. Paul said (1 Timothy, "Bodily exercise profitelh which Barclay translates, "The training of the body has only a limited value." Emphasis on sport was a mark of Rome in her de- cline. The Olympic Games were held in Berlin just before the Second World War and Hitler's ghastly evils. Some time ago St. Louis linebacker, Dave Meggyesy, wrote a revolting description of football through high school into professional teams Olympic competition, but Russia is in- cluded despite the hideous Czech trials in- stigated hy Russia and Russian imperial- ism. Latin American countries like Brazil are permitted to compete. So are dictator- ships like Greece and Romania. From ob- servation of the development of football in Canada, I agree heartily with the critics who maintain that it tends to dehumanize football players and spectators alike. Cer- tainly it has Income a religion that tends to occupy a disproportionate- amount of time on Sunday TV. And when you con- sider that Americans are spending bil- lion this year on recreation, sports, and leisure activities, which is more than ths defense budget or the overall value of ths country's exports, it Is also disproportion- ate, considering slums, pollution, and pov- erty. Our beautiful sandhills travellers and explorers went around sscdhllls whenever possible. Wagon trains had trouble with the wheels cutting deep in the loose sand, and the presence of frequent alkali patches kept them away. But wagon trails skirled tho edges of sandhill districts, often pretty close, because of (lie availability of fire- wood and water. Surface water was usual- ly too alkaline for man or animal, and streams and springs were not very numer- ous, but seepage spots were easily dug out and shallow wells provided plenty of good water. The district I know and like the best (a marked on the map as The Great Sand- By PVaser Hodgson game for the Indian people of the plains, and in season thera were bushels of choke- cherries, saskatoons, buffalo berries, and wild-rose berries for making pemmican. I suppose I favor sandhill country more than some people, because I've spent lot of time working and living nearby. I have ridden a horse over a good sized area of the eastern part, and driven a car through them many times from east to west and north to south. Hunting prairie chickens, rabbits, coyotes, and badgers took me and my friends through many miles of brush and hills. The ecology and game balance of sand- hill country is very easily upset, because of limited moisture and soil strength, so hills They roughly form a large triangle wild game was almost wiped out in the from Maple Creek north to Fox Valley ".....1- and Leader in southwestern Saskatchewan, then soutlreast almost to Swift Current, and back west again to Maple Creek. The only trees in sandhill country ol southwest Saskatchewan are a few poplar, cottonwood, and willow in sheltered low thirties and forties. Eiren the roads cut by oil exploration have caused a bad wind erosion, problem, as wind will never leave any loose sand lying around, and every passing vehicle tears a bit more free to blow away. Mv wife and I drove some of my old is covered with wolf willow and sage brush. Until a few years ago tho trees didn't amount to much, as nearby home- High and low spots in U.S. landscape cerning light on ists introducing new species to photographers contributed to It would be possible to putt, ISIS IJHrUUUClHU new in rj'HEY say one picture is strargc aveas even points the book, making it a work oE out the harm done by over- art. worth a thousand word: In'the'game's "quaint parlance, well dozens of pictures and protection against forest fires, but there's little money in that; thousands of words have (o Sense undergrowth, the best, and that's what this creating a greater fire hazard book is, one of the best. Beautifully printed, pictures- so the founders decided to move the hole half a mile from tho tee, thereby necessitating because it chokes put healthy trees. It is interesting to note Scanning the history of the canyon, from its beginning eons ago, through (lie first sighting by white men and on to the author's own experience shoot- tlie lake created by the Glon Can- yon Dam. The lake, to add (o the injury Powell would feel if he were still here, is named af- ter him. Indians play a role in the can- yon story and the book even incluc'es an re- cips for rabbit soup End a rath- er revolting way lo tan hides. A curiosity of (he canyon con- cerns the snowfall. One year spots and 'nearly all the remaining ground familiar trails last year, and I could hardly believe my eyes at the number of graded roads, pumping oil wells, and pipelines and ____________ _ tanks dotting those sandhills. The big steaders kept them cut for firewood and patches of sand, bare of any kind of framework for straw sheds and barns. The growth, were still there, and many trees are doing better now, but so is tha along the roads threatened lo start mors wolf-willow, sage, wild rose bushes, and Shara-like sand dunes. The wells will be chokecherries, because the grass is kept there for a lot of years, but some day pastured to almost nothing. When the grass they'll dry up and then the everlasting is kept down everything else takes over, sandhills will again take over. Tho sand The patches of sandgrass are getting big- can absorb oil spills better than more ger too for the same reason no animal productive soil, and as there are no will chew its rough saw-tooth quality un- streams and lakes, except alkali, there is less forced by starvation. The prairie wool nowhere for a spill lo go and pollute grca! keeps backing away. Some community pas- areas of lard. ture projects are overcoming this broadcasting sowing of tame grass The mountains and deep woods arc won- so dcrful, but a ride through my sandhill maybe with a little luck man might repair country in spring would never be forgotten UlU L U U, UealUllUllV, II J.V .3 CJUllfc, m -_ 11. the swing, and it is impossible m.elv writtcn and magnificent- that nr.E tree, thc knobcone mg the mighty Colorado s rap- lhe snowfall on the north rim to perform a with, a fy photographed, this book is pine, to have ils cones lto a maslermece. 17 .nrhos while hunched and broken body with- cnc every nature worshipper baked open oy a fores! fire, ids, the book is a masterpiece. A partial log of the Powell ex- out falling over. Unless you Irave golf-ihoes to tether you to must have. Thc writing of Ezra Bowen is as vivid and colorful the ground, at a tenner a brace, as exquisite double-page No fires, no knobcone pines. allowing seeds (o esl pedition reveals some of the cape, keeping the species alive. nnroimtr-red bv (he and clothes which do not fire piiolographs. It is one of (he One wonders why man can't their buttons off when the crip- few around loday that is just cnjcy rature without trying pled hulk beneath begins to worih its price. (0 improve on it. But man, be- stir, like golf-jackets; and, author's dry, subtle hu- impro ing a heller planner of course, _______ _. once committed to the unneces- in numer- knows he can do belter. rimr anfl Ihn linn (VPISflrV ___ Al encountered by (he one-armed river and his men. It is ironic lo note that (he one spot singled out by Powell as the most beautiful in (ho canyon has been buried by a totalled 17 feet six inches while (he south rim had eight feet of the Huffy stuff. The snowfall on the canyon floor, one mile low- er lhan the Tliis is a fine piece of work a man about an even finer piece of work by nature. GARRY ALLISON the damage he has caused. I know some will disagree with mo about the beauty of this particular part of our land, and claim it's the most lonesome and desolate drive they can think of along the whole of highway number one, but 1 enjoy it far more than a lot of other dis- tricts. All the way from Medicine Hat to Swift Current is a drive I never get tired of, and I'm sure I could see something of interest if I drove it every week. The vari- citl'.er. The fragrance of blooming wolf- willow isn't the sweetest I'd admit, but it's different than anyllu'ng I know of, and mixed with sage, yellow buffalo beans, and crocus makes an aroma you won't soon forget, Later in the spring the wild roses bloom, ard that I'll put up against any wild flower it just can't be described in words. Tiie tangled bramble clumps of these wild roses make a home for liltlo brown cottontail rabbits. And as these eary club and the unnecessary swing that accompanies it if the ball is to go Hie unneces- sary distance to the hole, you are required to purchase a pair of equally unnecessary golf- -cvipUons o( the rugged, over- gloves, to avoid the blisters mountains and down which nrc another thing dou _ nirmrcntr ous spots, but it's his unhesitat- ing ability to lay the facts on the line, without fear of step- ping on people's toes (hat the book. BOwen's des- GARRY ALLISON "Grand Canyon" Robert Wallace {Time-Life Book, distributed by Little, Brown and Co. Ltd., S3, These troubled times ation in patches of dryland farms, rolling pretty little animals keep their brown fur brash covered hills, the Cypress ridge to all year round, (lie rose buslKS arc the only the south, and the mixture of colors from protection they have against enemy predi purple sa'ge and wolf willow, to green, brown, and straw color at different times of the year always fascinate me. Then there is the break of the railroad showing up here and there, and a few small towns a prairie fire with a plow and sir horses. just off the modern highway, and intermit- Maybe some day a section of these hills tors. Change comes very slowly in Ihesc hills, and wandering lines of high sandgrass and weeds still mark I once helped fight days of firmament crawlies. Another advantage of moving the hole away from (he tco was that it rendered thc single club obsolete, and forced man to accept a dozen different in nis ''Sht caresses ol in the last two n n n t and fraEile. paragraphs of Ihis well- paragraphs beaulifully phofo- his love and concern for the Sierras. You'll love the slory of (he ouzel _ a hird not sure whetlv cr he should fly or swim. You'll anger at the ranger's dcscrip- _________ clubs- When this turned out lo of pollution and damage been pointed out prior to read. 1 vnn 11 jng jbe book I would "Crises of (lie Republic" by Hannah Arcnclt (llarconrl, Brace Jovanovich, Inc., 2-10 pages, softback, ilistri- iinlcil by Longman Canada lo the American scene but it has high visibility there and has caused special anguish be- cause of tho. assassination of several noted leaders. These important themes are tent groups of farms, ranches, and some- times nothing but what the original people of this land were used to every day. I'm will be set aside as a wilderness area, and allow nature to cure the mistakes man has made trying to change things to sure this great triangle of sandhills pro- suit himself. I hope after tha oil li gone vided wood, water, shelter, and plenty of they will give it a try. ALTHOUGH tho essays explored perceptively by Miss UOOK is me appaiimg A ._ fact that two new dams, which would submerge a great por- tion of the canyon, are being considered. If Ihis fact had ggd itoff. Butr brought together in (bis hook focus especially on (he crises faced hy (he U.S. govern- ment in recent years, they have relevance beyond that country. Lying in politics is not a vice well known aulhor and lecturer. Some further elaboration is provided through a concluding section which is an interview of Miss Arnedt by the German writer Adelbert bunkers, which required a new kind of club altogether. It is entirely appropriate that Hitler commuted suicide in onc. damaging domcsl'c sheep as "hoofed locusts." You'll ponder f "it Keif. The whole collection de- Enigmatic remarks By Dong Walker Sunday Uus summer when we went I kept thinking maybe he was planning th chose a pew in 'o do something spectacular lise stride already to the front during a hymn and wave myself'beside Paddy us all on to a faster tempo or rise during 'Oh, oh, I guess I'm in for it to church beauty of this mile-deep nat- ural excavalion, one shudders in wonderment at the beauty of at the thought that man would Mihi'.iL-u Photographs and the awe- it under tons of water just Willi all these clubs, and his inspiring grandeur of thc high light up a few more signs in ___ already tortured by tho rules, it was immediately ap- mounlain regions. Las Vegas. The book; brings out the need The book is filled with mag. Pentagon Papers; civil dis- obedience is not. unknown in ether parts of thc world but sel- dom have so many heen in- volved a.s in the U.S. in recent years; violence is not confined htve to be an inadequate synop- s's as a result of space limita- tions. I commend thc hook to students of the recent past in America. DOUG WALKER sconced. said, now." I managed to keep my attention fairly well focused on the service but every once in awhile my thoughts strayed to that enig- matic utterance. What, did ho, mean hy (hat remark? the sermon and challenge a point ths preacher was making. But the service passed without incident. So there Is nothing lo report and (ho public is left wondering what Paddy really intended to do that meriicd write-up in Ihe paper. ;