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Lethbridge Herald Newspaper Archives

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Lethbridge Herald, The (Newspaper) - March 5, 1974, Lethbridge, Alberta Doris Clark Tuesday, March 5, 1974 THE LETHBRIDGE HERALD Girl advised to share a burden Dear Doris: When I was 19 I lived for a while with my married sister. However, my brother-in law wanted me to have sex relations with him and even fought me until I was exhausted. When I would not give in he said he would use a lover's perfume on me so I could not resist him! Then suddenly no matter how I fought him I had to end up giving in. At the same time I hated him for what he was doing to me and my sister. I have now been away from them for three years but I am so bitter about all that happened, even when I know that I did not contribute of my own free will! I could not face my sister and tell .her everything and I don't know if she would understand, if I did. Could I get married again? All I am waiting for is my annulment papers. Miss Annonimust. DEAR MISS A.: Sure you could, but better wait till you have those annulment papers in, your hand. DEAR DORIS: We adopted a girl when she was four. She is nearly 13. A few weeks ago she met a boy 18 and has brought him to the house. We told her he was too old for her but she wouldn't listen to us. I had the minister talk to her and he gave her a book; and that night the boy came back again. She still won't listen and neither will he. What do you do? I have prayed about it. Worried in Belleville. I? Do you think this bitterness within me will affect my future love life? Everything he did including some rather perverted love-making is now affecting my conscience. Guilt Feelings. Dear G.F.: No use telling your sister. She was probably aware of her husband's sexual weaknesses anyway, and might take on some of those unreasonable guilt feelings. It was the man's lust and depravity that started this. You need to unburden either by talking to your family doctor or to a counsellor at your family service agency. It will surprise you what a relief it will be to unload, no matter how embarrassing it is. You have a whole happy love life ahead of you. Dear Doris: My husband died'recently and I have received many lovely sympathy cards. I have acknowledged them but my sister says I was wrong. I thought it kind of friends and others to remember us at such a time. I would appreciate it more than you know to find out what is correct. Just Widowed. Dear Widowed: Etiquette does not require any response to any type of printed greeting card or sympathy card. But if a friend goes to the trouble of writing a letter or sending flowers or other gifts in sympathy, a written response is indicated. This does not mean there is anything wrong with acknowledging even printed messages, if you" want to. But friends will understand it if you are overwhelmed with condolences and cannot write a personal note to every acquaintance. DEAR DOKIS: I got married in 1971, and have no children. My hus- band left me two days after I married him. I found out that he was married before and has six children and a wife. DEAR WORRIED: Your girl is probably, flattered by the attention' of the 18-year-old young man; and her feelings of being strongly attracted to men at this stage can be healthy, natural urges. Forbidding her does not seem to work; in fact if she is a wilful, headstrong girl, it could make her all the more determined to have her own way. But at 13 she really cannot have her own way in all things. Have you really tried to get to know the young man? To find out about his friends and what he does? If he is a nice steady person (even though too old for then invite him to your home along with some other young people your daughter likes. If he is not of good character and you are certain his intentions are less than honorable lower the boom! Your daughter is a minor and if anything happened to her or she became pregnant he could be charged with contributing to juvenile delinquency. You need to set some dating rules, but since your daughter scorns your control, you might find it helpful to talk with a counsellor at your child care agency DEAR DORIS: I am writing to you because I don't know where else to go for help. I have tension headaches for which I have been taking 16 pills a day for the past 18 years. They make me sleepy. I am worried about the number of pills I take but the doctor says they are mild, that I merely have headaches and that I'll get over them. I have tried cutting down the number of pills, but it's impossible. Tensions. DEAR TENSIONS: This is a medical ques- tion, but if you go by me and I am not a doctor you will look for a psy- chological cause for your headaches. If you can't learn to relax by reading books about it and there are plenty find someone to whom you can unload and do it regularly. This does not have to depend on your husband's approval. If I were taking 16 pills a day for 18 years you can be sure I'd be doing something about it. Are you sure your present doctor under- stands? Address all questions to Doris Clark, 66 Rosedene Ave., Hamilton, Ont. DAVIS ENTERPRISES (ALBERTA) We Pay HighMt Prices tor ALBERTA STEEL PRODUCTS Division of Davif Indiutrin Lid. in New Structural Steel, Angles, Rats and Pipes (Wholestle Prices) Both Businesses Located at 1505 2nd Ave. S., Lethbridge Phone 327-4035 or 327-6261 VISIT OUR DISPLAY AT AG-EXPO TUESDAY; WEDNESDAY, THURSDAY, FRIDAY, SATURDAY March 5-6-7-8-9 TOWNE COUNTRY FURNITURE and DUCAN INDUSTRIES have arranged to have one of Duncan's qualified upholster- ers build a quality chesterfield and chair each evening. See the upholsterer at work each evening to p.m. WATCH YOUR SUITE BEING BUILT THEN BID ON IT AT THE GIANT AUCTION SATURDAY. MARCH 9th Visit our booth and enter your name for a Free Draw to be held Saturday, March 9-for a luxurious. SWIVEL ROCKER valued at CJV The Carpet People' at OpN Mf t ML II 6 pJ i ML to i SIMM Mrt. i 3ZH151 [Towfie Country" T ;