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Lethbridge Herald Newspaper Archives

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Lethbridge Herald, The (Newspaper) - March 5, 1974, Lethbridge, Alberta 12 LETHBRIDGE HERALD Tuesday, March 5, 1974 Lynne Van Luven An antidote for 'supermarket sterility9 Seven out of ten Canadians are suffering from a severe case of 'supermarket sterility.' After thorough study of this loathesome affliction, I am able to confidently describe the symptoms as follows- erratic steering of shopping carts, inability to grasp firm objects such as rutabagas, stoic facial III II III lill Never Has There Been So Much, ForSoLittte! THE YAMAHA DK4O ORGAN Ask for a free demonstration Of the YAMAHA DK-40 ORGAN at our display booth at AG- EXPO all this week. expressions, generally unresponsive to surroundings, patients appear somewhat atutistic but display alarming tendency to hysterical laughter when passing through check-out counter. Despite the many marvels of modern science, there appears to be no cure for this illness. And, since there are no funds for research, sufferers are faced with an agonizing and hopeless future unless Mrs. Plumptre has something up her sleeve, other than her usual off-the-cuff tsk- tsking over rising food prices. Although high prices have been a debilitating factor in the illness, they are not the cause. Supermarket sterility is, as the name suggests, caused by the colorless, cold and inhuman atmosphere in which North Americans buy their daily bread In Spain, little shops abound. Merchandise is hung outside the store, a bright banner to attract passers-by while glistening fruits and vegetables spill into the street from a green-grocer's crowded business. In Germany, luscious smells from coffee-bars and delicatessens constantly seduce one, wreaking bulging havoc with the waistline. And the scents of blintzes and cream cakes from the pastry shops have been known to cause plump pedestrians to fain dead away. In Morocco, a baker balances a tray of flattish circular loaves of bread on his head and threads his way through a street .crowded- with burros. Souks (shops) selling everything under the sun are cheek-to-jowl in the medina. And only in the medina would a ragged boy selling spices describe his wares as containing "all the world's flavors, Mrs. "You try and then break our heart with his urchin's smile. In Holland peddlars with bright street barrows will sell you red-wrapped globes of Edam cheese in Tooting, London, most clerks in neighborhood shops call you "luv" whether they know you or not. In Canada, shoppers are processed and robotized. They mechanically push carts up one long aisle and down another. Clerks extoll the prices of your plunder in a monotone, -never meeting your eye. And the produce manager flounces into the backroom in a huff when you inquire why today's tomatoes look like last week's casualties. Is it any wonder shopping is a bore and a trip to the supermarket is demoralizing and depressing? Mrs Plumptre may I call you Beryl? Beryl, we don't ask for much. We know you won't stop the rising prices. Inflation is bigger than all of us. But, Beryl, since we must part with all this money, can't we at least be entertained while spending it? All I want to know is, is it too much to ask that the butcher perform the Turkey Trot once in a while or that the produce man sing "Yes, we have no while I squander my cash. SEVENTY-FOUR-CAST CALE HARRIS President and General Manager GUYFOOTE Design and Sales Consultant TO US! CHRYSLER POWER UNITS PIVOT SPRINKLER AGE N0.1 IN ELECTRIC DRIVE A PUMP P.O. Box SS-1-6, 2351 2nd Ave" N, Lethbridge Phone: Off. Res. 327-4956 IRRIGATION PUMPS 9 Unequalled in quality 9 Performance 9 Efficiency Dependability ;