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Lethbridge Herald Newspaper Archives

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Lethbridge Herald, The (Newspaper) - March 5, 1974, Lethbridge, Alberta LETItBRIDGE March -The Herald Family Life after 65 Dilemma of moving Eighth of Ten Articles By JACK GOURLAY Two-thirds of Americans over age 65 own their own home, but with the family gone, the house may be too large, too expensive and too difficult to maintain. Therefore, the question, "To move or not to looms large. Especially when you consider that a major share of retirement income goes into housing costs. The choices open to you at age 65 or older must be given a considerable amount of thought. Aside from the economics of the situation, other factors, such as emotional ties with the community, social relationships, and personal satisfactions, must be considered. In the past, the old homestead generally contained a separate wing for the grandparents. The old people felt needed and useful and such living arrangements tended to create a stable family society. In today's tight housing situation, things are different. It is practically impossible to find the space or to afford it. But even granted the space, the problems inherent in group living and person-to-person relationships may prove to be too much, especially in those cases where there has been an excessive dependence of parent on children or vice- versa. Most older people prefer not to live with their child's family, and studies have shown that you may well stay healthier and live longer and happier if you maintain your own home, whatever it may be. If circumstances prevent you from maintaining your former home, or if it is too far away from where your children live and you want to be near them, a small apartment nearby is likely to be a better solution than doubling up. At least, then you can have your own things and lead your own life. Think twice about tearing up your roots; selling an old house can be a devastating emotional experience. From the logical standpoint, it might make sense to sell, but one who is used to his own home may be in for a shock when he finds himself in a smaller generally rather confining apartment. The experience can affect one's physical and mental health to the point where one becomes obsessed with escaping. In such a situation, it would be far better to stay put, even if the financial cost is greater, because in the end it will mean less wear and tear, less mental anguish, and less unhappiness. If you can't make up your mind about moving, it would be advisable to stay put for several months to see how retirement works out at the old homestead. Far too many have pulled up their roots, planted them somewhere else and regretted it. Many have found it more difficult than anticipated to establish the same sense of belonging in a new community than they enjoyed in their former one. If you are serious about making a change, spend some time researching the possibilities open to you. Don't be hasty. Visit the areas you think you might want to live in, get the feel for the new community. Rent a place and live there for several months, get acquainted with the people and facilities. Look into what it has to offer in recreation and health facilities, shopping, transportation and so on. Get firsthand, on-the-spot information. Find out what the weather is really like. Check into the cost-of-living, taxes local and state on automobile, property, sales, inheritance, luxury and excise. Also, think through the specific type of housing you would prefer: a small house, a co-op apartment, a condominium, a mobile home, or a "retirement" community. Each of these has certain advantages and disadvantages. These must be weighed according to how they fit into your needs and desires. Whatever you do, don't be taken in by fancy advertising, and buy "sight unseen." Go and try it. If you can't do that, at least ask the developer for an official "property report." This is required by law in most states. If you can't get one from the broker or developer, forget it. Check on the reputation of tie developer or broker with the Better Business Bureau in the community you are interested in. And, before signing on the dotted line, be sure to check things out with your lawyer. Questions to ask before deciding to move (add up the pluses and Do my present home and community suit my notion of a good life in the future? Do I now have convenient access to transportation, shopping, medical care, church, entertainment and recreation, educational and cultural facilities of interest to me? Will I be embarrassed to live in my present home on retirement income? Does the old house impose too much of a workload on me? Should I move for health reasons? Would I be able to adjust to a new situation at my age? How much wilLI really miss my old friends? Will I make new friends as easily as I used to? What can I gain by moving socially, economically, or otherwise? What could I lose by making the change? If the move doesn't work out, can I afford to relocate again? NEXT: Money and Where to Find It. Fighting the energy crisis Mary Granberg of Lethbridge has the right idea when it comes year-old bicycler claims she needs all three wheels because she to getting good exercise and helping to stave off the energy crisis "can't learn as easily as the kids can." in town. The three-wheeler gets her around in style, and the 57- Psychiatrists use cattle prods to modify behavior of autistic child SINGER pi save sale GOOD NEWS! THE GREAT FEBRUARY SALE HAS BEEN WTO MARCH! Look! Exciting new Sew and Save specials. Come in right now for fabulous buys on sewing machines and on fabrics and notions, too, at your TOTAL sewing and saving centre. Zig Sewing Machine Zig-Zag and Straight Stitching Sews buttonholes, buttons. mends, overedges-without attachments Exclusive front drop-in bobbin Complete with carrying case By AL COLLETTI NEW YORK (CP) A leading child psychiatrist says he has used cattle prods to shock children out of self- mutilating behavior. Dr. Ivar Lovaas of University of California at Los Angeles is an authority on autistic children. He describes such children as severely disturbed. "People seem to be no more than objects to them." At his Los Angeles clinic, Dr. Lovaas has handled some of the worst cases of autistic children from state institutions. Not all autistic children engage in self-mutilative behavior, but many do, Dr. Lovaas said. The treatment used to consist of putting them in full restraints. The child would be bound to a bed and spoon-fed. "We saw kids who were 10 years old who had been in restraints for six or seven years." Dr.: Lovaas uses shock punishment with considerable reluctance, but he said it's far better treatment than to tie autistic children down to a bed and let them vegetate. NEED SPANKING He said parents of autistic children should "spank them and shower them with THE BETTER HALF love to break them of their destructive habits. In an in the magazine Psychology Today, a national publication dealing with the behavorial sciences, Dr. Lovaas says parents are afraid to punish autistic children for biting and violent tantrums. They have been told a child behaves this way because he feels unloved, so if you punish him you are only making him worse. "But this is all. nonsense. And this theory has made a lot of parents feel terribly guilty and made the autistic child get worse instead of better." He advises parents with children showing aberrant behavior "to spank them good, and if they bite you and you just turn them over your knee and give them one good whack on the rear that pretty well does it." Treatment of self- mutilating children is difficult and lengthy and involves the parents intimately if it is to succeed, Dr. Lovaas says. BITE OFF FINGERS He says he has seen autistic children brought to his clinic who would bite their fingers off. Autistic children have tantrums "and they spend a lot of time in repetitive behaviors that we call self- stimulatory behaviors. "For example, they rock themselves back and forth or then spin around in a circle. All kids have tantrums and engage in self-stimulatory behaviors, but with autistic kids it is extreme, and they can do it for hours." At his clinic, Dr. Lovaas says that shock punishment with cattle prods is used only when children begin self- mutilation. "We stay close to them and when they hurt themselves we scream 'no' as loud as we can and we look furious and at the same time we shock them. "What typically happens is this we shock the child once and he stops for about 30 seconds and then he tries it again. We punish again and that is pretty much it. So we can cure self-destructive behavior even long- standing, self-destructive behavior in a matter of minutes." Dr. Lovaas says: "we know the shocks are painful; we have tried them on ourselves and we know that they hurt... You may have used shock successfully with a hundred kids, but you still are apprehensive about it. But "as soon as you suppress self-mutilation you start building appropriate behaviors. You reward the child for doing other things instead of hurting him." Dr. Lovaas warns that when an autistic child injures himself and a parent gives him lots of attention, the parent is rewarding him for injuring himself, and actually teaching the child to self- mutilate. He says in his clinic he has found that "when we love kids for self-mutilation the rate of self-mutilation increases; when we punish it, the rate decreases." Although autistic children have been held to be brighter than average children, Dr. Lovaas believes that, in a real sense, they are retarded. 'After all, many of them don't speak, are unable to dress themselves, and, are not toilet trained. So they are retarded in the sense that they are far behind their age group in the kinds of things they can do... Fred Cartwright, director of school services, for the Lethbridge Public School. Board, said that to his knowledge there are no cases of autistic children in Lethbridge. Mild cases would probably be treated by a local psychiatrist. However, severe cases which constitute a very small percentage, would be sent to either the Calgary or Edmonton treatment centres. Gentle Ghost stifled t through lack of funds By Barnes All I have to say about this recipe is that it's too bad that your mother can't keep a secret." TOUCH HELP US TO HELP OTHERS1 OH LEAVE AT 412 IK AVE. S. Select zig-zag, blind hern and multi-stitch patterns, with the flip of a lever Sew stretch fabrics, make buttonholes Sew heavy denims or thick suedes with ease. system for s-t-r-e-t-c-h sewing. Sews ail the new knits and stretch fabrics beautifully. Exclusive push-button bobbin, BuiM-in byttonho3cr. Save Complili with portable carrying taw Sure we're best. We taughi Jhe world Jo sew. SINGER Sewing and Participating Dealers Have yovr Carpets and ftrmturc deaned right in jretr home mates them, "flower-fresh" reooy for guests in just a few hours! NO tooting NO scrubbing Duradean's unique absorption See caters come owe, fibers revive, wpSoWery brightert IMS CREDIT TERVS AVAILABLE Shopping Mall Phona 327-2243 Opan Daily a.m. to 6 p.m. Thurt. Fri. till i p.m. For FXCE eifimole ccffi WILSON DONALDSON inh Am LtfMMOgt Ul !M> JJJ SMI t 1hrt wnHf fhe cu iff if fttnvrtCTt Bnwrfli ft MONTREAL (CP) All systems are "go" for Gentle Ghost, a new help centre which wants to work with youth in the city and surrounding suburbs, but lack of funds may kill the project before it gets off the ground. "The progress has been said "Mark Compton-Hall, one of the centre's directors. "We have a hospital to work with us for drug and abortion problems, we have lawyers who specialize in civil rights and we even have a place in suburban West Island to set up our operation." The centre has been seeking funds .from business groups but the response has been poor. "The whole problem now is money." Mr. Compton-Hall said. "We just haven't enough." He described Gentle Ghost as "a centre for human relations and It provides an environment where youth can feel at ease and utilize opportunities in workshops, at summer picnics and at sensitivity training sessions with the staff. "The atmosphere is to people working !H.P- lor producing a development of individual group potential." One of the aiiui J Gentle Ghost is to create a workshop where young people "with talent, but who don't know where to market their can work and sell their crafts at reasonable prices. Mr. Compton-Hall said he has ran into an "ostrich-like" reaction to the project from west island politicians "who don't want to rea'ize their community could use this sort of thing." "It's time they woke up to the facts." He accused' Montrealers, especially middle-and upper- class suburbanites, of refusing to recognize that a serious problem of alienation between youth and parents exists. He emphasized that Gentle Ghost is not just a drug-help centre but a "total life- development project" "It's really frustrating already we've spent 1600 of our own money and I can see the whole thing materializing beautifully. But I have visions of just getting everything together and then seeing it fall through because of lack of money." PUBLIC BINGO GAMES BLACKOUT UnW Won) LETHBRIDGE ELKS LODGE ROOM (UptWn) EVERY p LOYAL ORDER OF MOOSE 1234-3rd Ave. N. jular Wednesday Night p.m. 25 MONEY CARDS-MANY EXTRAS THIS WEEKS JACKPOT S1S5 IN M NUMBERS EnMr tor flw SSO EMMr Orw 5 cwtto Doubte-Door Mxa No one under 76 years affowed to play. WMttsuy Fish tone ASSK. SJIRUU at 8 PJQ. JACKPOT IN 53 NUMBERS 9 Jackpala 4ei SBi ISA S2S In 7 Nwnbara OOLO CARDS MY DOUBLE FMtt CARDS EAGLES HAUL ISA ST. N. FREE GAMES IS Yaara ________ L LEGION BINGO EVERY WEDNESDAY it 8 JACKPOT BLACKOUT IN 53 NUMBERS OR LESS 1M OAWC SM JACKPOT Sft OAME SB (X) 10th Oame SSOO Jackpot In Numbers FMEC BUS samcc HOME AFTCM tweo MEMORIAL HALL PUBLIC ISCftS AMD OUtSTS HOMUNDY LOWVOt CtffLONtN UNDER IS MOT ALLOWED ;