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Lethbridge Herald Newspaper Archives

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Lethbridge Herald, The (Newspaper) - July 17, 1974, Lethbridge, Alberta 34-THE LETHBRIDGE July Ann Landers Dear Ann Why my mother and father got married in the first place is beyond me. How they stuck it out for 14 years is even a bigger mystery. I am the product of that unhappy marriage. Two years ago my mother met and married a widower. He is a fabulous person and he and Mom are crazy about each other. My friends love to come to our house and listen to him play the guitar. Everyone thinks he's the greatest. I should be but I'm terribly mixed up about my feeling regarding my real father. I love I think or am I just saying I do because I'm ashamed that I Whenever I go to visit him he sits there with a three-day dirty shirt and a can of beer in his hand. All he can talk about is how much rotten luck he has had. I get sick to my stomach listening to him complain. Actually he dis- gusts me Am I a bad daughter because I hate to go see my I make myself go because I know I'll feel guilty if I don't. Is it normal to feel disgust for your own flesh and Or maybe what I really want is for you to tell me it would be 0 K. if I stopped seeing the self-pitying slob. Straighten me Ann. I'm a Mixed Up Kid Dear You are torn by conflicting emotions. Your feelings of loyalty for your dad are pitted against the dis- gust you which is un- derstandable. Then there's the guilt that haunts you because vou feel deep down that children should love their parents Dear Ann If you print this letter I will love you to my dying day. Dear Mail I am not your and I don't want to be addressed as or Please get lost with your free bonus gifts and pre-clearance specials. My mind boggles at your logic. I am yet you plead with me to purchase a retire- ment cottage in Arizona. I am but you suggest I it over with the I have twelve and you urge me to send for assembly kits that would baffle Albert Einstein. I have two left yet you promise me I'll be another Nureyev if I sign up for ten dancing lessons. I live in a mobile home and my mailbox is bulging with offers to build a basement or remodel my attic. You create additional work for an already overburdened postal department that can barely sort the billions of pieces of serious mail. Postmen have enough to do without lugging tons of un- wanted junk to people who consider it an invasion of their privacy. May your computer develop a double hernia. Over-Garbaged In K.C. Dear Go ahead and love me to your dying but don't expect your letter to change anything Millions of people like mail and that's enough to keep those cards and letters coming'. Even if drinking is the thing in your it needn't crowd you out. Learn the facts from Ann Landers' booklet and You For Teen- Agers Send 35c in coin and a self stamped envelope to Ann P.O. Box Illinois 60654. Sexual activity may be a child's distress sign By JOANNE KOCH Newspaper Enterprise Assn. Last of four Sexual activity can become a symptom of disturbance. There are times when parents should react with for the child is psy- chologically putting out a red warning flag which should signal parents to get help for the child in some for themselves. If we are overly anxious about all sexual activity in our we may not notice these distress signals. What is normal and what are danger Child psy- chiatrist and sex education consultant Ner Littner points out that an isolated act itself tells the psychiatrist nothing. Going into the bathroom and examining each playing even playing at inter- course may be completely normal for children who have seen something like it. But there are recurring symptoms which are real reasons for concern and veiled requests for help. Sexual activities such as masturbation and sexual curiosity become If they are The child who is constantly preoccupied with where children come the boy who repeatedly on touching his mother's the girl or boy who is repeatedly found mastur- bating all exhibit this symp- tom. If the child's activities intrude on other people's lives. The child who mastur- bates in private is different from the one who does so on main street. The child's abili- ty to keep it private is an im- portant aspect of his ability to grasp reality. If sexual interest is non- The child who shows no sexual curiosity is also like- ly to show related symptoms extreme inability to make a lack of interest in other people and other things. A parent whose child's behavior is nor- mal in other ways playing usually need not be concerned. The child probably is either ex- pressing his sexuality private- ly or the parent just hasn't noticed. If there are prolonged night-time Dr. Littner points out that the child who is preoccupied with sexual matters seems to be unusually worried at night about what's going on between his parents. Nightmares that go on too long or a recurring need to come into a parent's bed may stem from the child's desire to break up the action. Parents who have made the mistake of permitting a frightened child to come into their bed on many occasions may have started a precedent which encourages even a nor- mal child to invade their privacy repeatedly. Dr. Littner advises parents whose children exhibit any of these symptoms to seek help. Both he and Dr. Maria Piers remind parents that these are not conditions. Ex- cessive masturbation which is needed as a palliative is the child's way of I am so uncomfortable that I must make myself feel better by continually masturbing rocking or twisting a lock of In these cases the ac- tivity is not an end in itself a perversion as many adults fear but an indication of another problem. in many means counselling for the entire family. To Dr. Charles of the Family In- stitute of a child's excessive for may mean that he is trying to break out of an over- ly rigid and repressive family pattern. So profound is the influence of the family atmosphere on the family therapists that no significant change can be made in the child's behavior unless the whole network of family relationships is altered. Family which the parents usually agree to at- tend because of their inevitably uncover difficulties in the marriage which encourage or aggravate the child's unaccep- table behavior. Parents are simply quicker to recognize disturbances in their children than in themselves. Just as parents often blame their marital problems on their children often pass the misbehavior buck to playmates. They may try to make themselves look good by blaming things on their friends. Censoring the mis- behavior rather than the playmate is advisable unless there is proof that a particular friend is actually causing your child to get into trouble. Many parents are still in the process of resolving their own complicated attitudes towards sex and they wish the whole issue of childhood sexuality would just go away. Perhaps it lightens our burden to remember that the same child who perplexes us with does f--k can also did the first drop of rain come many seconds until I'm in first the difference between man's law's and God's THE BETTER HALF By Barnes AFTERNOON BINGO MOOSE 3rd Ave. North a Carda Money DOUBLID Weekly Cards Sponsored by The Moose Lodge No Children Under 16 Allowed to Welcome you know you a ticket for a U-turn at a mar- ket exit even if you've forgotten the meat for Sears Wig Clearance to Reg. to 10 Days July 18 While Quantities Last Clearance of our Regular Quality Line. Current and favorite fashions Easy-care Elura. Dynel-Capless Skiv-Part and capped. U.S. families temporarily adopt Irish children MINNEAPOLIS. Minn. Twenty-five Northern Irish youngsters temporarily adopted by United States families pic- nicked on the shores of Lake Minnetonka in the first reunion since their arrival nearly three weeks ago. The 25 are among some 120 Irish children staying with Mid- western families in a six-week program designed to give them some respite from the Protestant-Catholic troubles in their homeland. The 25 children staying in the Minneapolis area have mingled freely with American but had not seen each other un- til the picnic this week at the home of the Calvin MacDonalds of suburban Navarre. will be the only contact they'll have with each said Mrs. who asked reporters not to question the children about their iife in Ireland. be a good day for them to discuss the things that are happening in their The youngsters scrambled on the enjoyed sailboat and motorboat rides and stuffed themselves with food. There were huge platters of fried potato salad and other goodies. the asked Ann Marie a blonde from the Turflodge District in Belfast. don't get it at home and I've really learned to like Ann who learned to swim in less than two is a guest at the Ray Smith home of nearby Shorewood and is al- ready planning another visit to the U.S. Joseph Hair Styles AH Your Hair Needs At Prices You Can SUMMER SHORTCUT and UNI PERM ONLY All Colors and Perms include Shampoo and Set. ROSEANN. TERRI. MAXINE and MARY LYNN JOSEPH HAIR STYLES 922 S Ave. N. Phone 328-7366 6 only. Reg. 7 only. Reg. 4 only. Reg. 1 only. Reg. 13 only. Reg. 14 only. Reg. 5 only. Reg. 21 only. Reg. 4 only. Reg. 644 799 1750 ANNUAL GLEN'S SHOE STORE SUMMER SHOfc ci Men's SUMMER SHOES off Blue Black White CHILDREN'S SHOES Must TENDER TOOTSIES Reg. to 10.00 pair NOW pair 5 99 Short and Discontinued Lines of HEEL HUGGERS and MEN'S SHOES SELBY SHOES Wig Boutique Ltd.- at Simpsons-Sears you get the finest guarantee Mtiefactlon or money refunded and free delivery Store Open Daily a.m. to p.m. Thursday and Friday 9-30 a.m. to p.m. Centre Village Mall. Telephone 328-9231 Reg. to 32.00 pair NOW pair. 179 9 Must be Cleared to make Way for our Fall Lines TEENERS SHOES WOMEN'S SHOES Reg. to 22.00 pair NOW pair 99 SELECTION OF ocLEbiiun ur PURSES 25 t and beige Joe Selection of MEN'S SHOES Must be cleared. Reg. to 24.00 pair NOW pair.. Must be CHILDREN'S SANDALS Short lines Reg. to 6.00 pair NOW pair 2 99 Short and Discontinued Lines of GOLD CROSS and AIR STEP SHOES Reg. to 28.00 NOW pair Selection of Short and Discontinued Lines of SUMMER SANDALS Reg. to 19.00 Now pair 5.99 Rag. to 25.00 Now pair 7.99 BALANCE OF MEN'S. WOMEN'S ind CHILDREN'S SUMMER SANDALS GREEN'S SHOES ______________Open Thursdays till 9 p.m. Downtown on Sixth Street ;