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Lethbridge Herald Newspaper Archives

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Lethbridge Herald, The (Newspaper) - January 28, 1975, Lethbridge, Alberta Tuesday, January LETHBRIDGE Doris Clark Lonely man told attraction comes last DEAR DORIS: I try to be'likable but I haven't got enough friends to make me feel accepted in the world. I know two girls, divorced, who like me and I like them, too, but they do not interest me at all sexually. Hence, marriage is out for me. I feel super lonely when I arrive home on the bus every day. A few girls who dressed cheap and had the shortest skirts on in Liverpool (on my holidays) made me feel sexy, but I really looked down at them and didn't admire them. I feel guilty about going to England because I could have spent the money on Mom for her 73rd birthday. I live in a comfortable, bright room and yet a few married couples I do know; have me over but never drop in one me despite the fact I do invite them. I'm pretty sure my source r' loneliness and trouble is in me. Feeling Suicidal. DEAR FEELING: If you have two nice girls who like you you're lucky. Sexual attraction often comes last. Keep your friends. Perhaps feeling sexy in Liverpool was not a lost experience, if it helped you to separate this com- pletely physical feeling from the respect which goes with true friendship. If you feel lonely and blue when you ride home on the bus, at the end of the day, join the club with a few-million other people. Feeling tired makes people blue. It is a low period in the day, especially if you face an empty room and an unoccupied evening. Do not just suggest to your friends that they drop in; name a date and make a fuss. Many people who seem aloof or indifferent are really wrapped up in their own bundle of trouble. Try thinking positively about how to help them. DEAR DORIS: My husband has passed away. His eldest brother will be retiring soon. The family plan to have an af- fair for him at a hotel and I am invited to attend. They have stipulated an amount for the purse collection. Would it be appropriate, at this dinner, to observe a couple of minutes of silence in memory of their deceased brother? The parents are deceased for some time, but his is the first death of the children. Who suggests the silence? And when? Before or after the dinner? Grateful. DEAR GRATEFUL: It is like mixing chalk and cheese. A dinner to honor the retirement of one brother is hardly an occa- sion for the mourning of another. Those present will surely have expressed their sym- pathy and paid their respects at the time of your husband's passing. You know they care about you, and the whole family will appreciate an oppor- tunity to meet happily together. Let this be the other brother's night. Let him be the centre of attention. Your own attitude of good cheer will do much to make people feel free to enjoy themselves. They will love you all the more if you "put on a cheerful DEAR DORIS: When is the will to be read and who is supposed to read it? Who makes all the arrangements for funerals? Trying To Plan. DEAR TRYING: Usually a will is read after the funeral, while relatives are still gathered together. If the estate is a one, a family lawyer may be the one who reads it aloud to them. But more often a member of a family (the executor if you know who it is) reads out the desires of the deceased Arranging for the funeral usually falls to the lot of a family member, who is often in a state of shock over the loss of the loved one. So it is wisdom indeed to plan ahead There are memorial societies in a number of our cities who can give you definite directions about how to make arrangements right now and save a good deal of anguish at the time of death. (If any one would like specific guidance as to the address of a memorial society near where you live, write in and I will be glad to look up my DEARDORIS: I am 38 and I met this girl 18. Despite the age difference we get along well and seem to have a lot of things in common, same background (raised on a go to same church, etc. We talked about marriage, and decided age does not make that much difference as long as we have a lot in common. We have been wondering how things would be in 20 or 25 years when I'd be 65 and she 45. We have decided to wait a year or so before really making a decision but believe we could make a go of a marriage. I'd be pleased to have your advice. Should we forget about it? I know of several such marriages that seem to have worked. Undecided. DEAR UNDECIDED: So much depends on how mature your girl is, how youthful you are physically' and mentally, and what you expect from marriage, that I can hardly advise you. Besides the fact that you are old enough to be her father, your special 18 year old still has some maturing to do. I couldn't agree more than if the un- ion is to have any chance of success at all, you should wait a year or two before making your decision. Things we are very definite about, at 16 or 17 or 18, have a way of ruling themselves completely out of the question at age 20 or 21. It's the truth! And, I might say, it is the reason why many teen-age marriages fail. DEAR DORIS: I have a charcoal portrait done by my late uncle. He was a natural, untrained artist. Lately I had a buyer for this portrait who is deter- mined that he wants it. He knew my uncle as a child and feels it is my duty to let my uncle get the recognition that he would give him as an art collec- tor. I would like to know what you think this piece is worth. There are six portraits in all, about 20 by 28 inches. The prospective buyer wouldn't even give us a clue. Where do I go to find out what would be a fair price? Fair Price. DEAR FAIR: The only person who would really have a clue is an art expert. Take all six portraits to art dealers in nearby cities, after your fingers have walked through the Yellow Pages and located them. You need several separate and unbiased opinions. Then you can decide whether to keep the portraits in the family or sell them. If you do sell them quote a fair price and stick to it.. Perhaps the buyer does not know their value himself. Anonymous letters are bad manners and may be ignored. When writing, give Doris your correct name and address. It will be kept confidential. Address all cor- respondence to Doris Clark, 66 Rosedene Ave., ftamilton, Ont. L9A 1E9. ECONOMY METAL WORKS Vulcan, Alberta STEEL STOCK GATES LIMITED TIME OFFER! STOCK SIZES 16ft....................Special Qv 1, 1 12ft.................. J now. We will also build to your specifications PHONE 485-2774 ATTENTION! FARMERS, RANCHERS OIL FIELD CONTRACTORS For dirt work and Brush clearing we have two D7 CATERPILLARS with Dozers Scrapers HOURLY RATES OR CONTRACT Box 952 PITIRSON 239-3904 CLARESHOLM DONQRHN 239-3193 ;