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Lethbridge Herald Newspaper Archives

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Lethbridge Herald, The (Newspaper) - December 19, 1970, Lethbridge, Alberta 16 THE LETHBRIDGE HEBALD Scilurclciy, December 19, 1970 Ann Landers DEAK ANN LANDERS: I am a divorcee, 34 but I look younger. The "problem" I am writing about isn't exactly a problem yet, but it could be. So I am writing lo Ann Landers in the spirit of "preventive medicine." I am planning to marry a man who is a few years my Junior. Phil is divorced, but he has no children. We are both in love for the very first time. The potential problem is my daughter. Babs is "l4 going on 20 if you get what I mean She is as fully developed as I was when I married. The girl has entirely too much sex appeal for a kid her age. Whenever Phil is around she behaves in a flirty manner and is shamefully aggressive. (Probably testing her feminin- ity.) I have said nothing to anyone but it bothers me a great deal. Should I speak to Babs or to Phil or should I keep quiet? Does this bode ill for the future? Babs is really a good girl but her own father ignored her and perhaps this is why she is so eager for male attention. I should tell you that my" daughter is hostile and openly competitive with me. Am I over-reacting? What do you think? Tinderbox DEAR T.: Psychiatrists call the step-daughter-dad crush the Phaedra complex. (Phaedra was a mythological character in Greek literature who married an older man.) This some- times occurs with natural fathers and sexy daughters but less often because of our cultural taboos against incest. One of the principle motivating factors, of course, is a daughters inborn competitiveness with her mother. Say nothing to Babs. She would interpret your uneasiness as fear and insecurity. Phil should be alerted to the seduc- tive aspect of the girl's behavior. His reaction should be a fatherly response, friendly but not too intimate. The poor girl's problem is, as you suggested, rejection from- her real dad. DEAR ANN LANDERS: My father-in-law is a nice he has dinner with us he does something that makes me sick to my stomach. Just before the dessert is served, he lights up a cigarette then he mashes the cigarette out in the leftover potatoes or whatever is on his plate. When I see him do this I get so mad I cuss under my breath. Don't suggest that I tell him. My husband will not tolerate any criticism of his father. Please, Ann, suggest something. My ulcer kicks up every time he does this disgusting thing. Dyspeptic Doris DEAR D.D.: The moment your father-in-law lights up, remove his dinner plate and replace it with a nice big ash- tray. Simple wasn't it? Drinking may be "in" to the kids you run with but it can put you "out" for keeps. You can cool it and stay popular. Read "Booze And You For Teen-Agers Only." Send 35 cents in coin and a long, self-addressed, stamped envelope with your request. NOW YOU ARE FINISHED SCHOOL And Desire to Learn a Profession WHY NOT BECOME A HAIRDRESSER We have 3 fully qualified full time instriK rresses and we teach all phases of culture, hair styling and cutting, bleaching, tinting and permanent waving. You'll enjoy our new remodelled and air-conditioned school. A professional beautician pays high- er than the average income and opportu- nities are unlimited. I 1 Alberta Beauty School fill Out 405 5tH Sti s._ Lethbridge low Monthly This Coupon Tuition NAME Payments For Mcrs _, i ADDRESS Classes Information __ Starting Now Carolling, coffee-house for Kate Andrews Dec. 23 CATHOLIC CENTRAL FINISHES PROJECT Greg Royer, right, president of the students' council in Catholic Cen- tral High School, along with Frank Sifrer, left, present Rose Yellow Feet of the Lethbridge Friendship Centre with and a box of canned goods. These were col- lected as a student project of the school, and will be utiliz- ed in a turkey and cranberry meal to be held at the Centre Christmas day. ____ Freedom in marriage part six Family life education By LEUOY ANGLE Lctlibriilge Family Service J'OHN and Mary have spent hours talking to one an- other in an effort to understand what was going on between them and why they have had a, sense of dissatisfaction with one another. At first it seemed as though they were just going around in circles. Their effort seemed to be ail in vain. But gradually some light has begun to show through and some un- derstanding lias been develop- ed. Through long hours of discus- sion John has come to realize that he has felt trapped, not be- cause Mary has a dominating personality, but because he feels inferior to her and dependent upon her. This is the way he had felt about all adults when he was growing up. And sur- puimgly to him, he still feels that way about Mary. He dis- covered that he has been trans- fei i ing his dependency from his parents onto Mary and inward- ly rebelling against Mary as he had done against his parents. When John came to under- stand himself better and real- ized what he was doing, he ex- pressed his feelings and insight to Mary. She could hardly be- lieve her ears. For this is the way she had felt about John.' Is it she asked, "for two people to live together both feeling inferior to the oth- er and both rebelling against the other's PUBLIC 16 GAMES LETHBRIDGE ELKS LODGE ROOM JACKPOT (Upstairs) EVERY p.m. I________ being the dog walker in the win- ter. A COMPLETE SELECTION wiih to thank all our customers for Iheir patronage and wisH everyone o Vt'ry Merry Christmas! SHOES LTD. 615 4th Ave. S. Phone 327-7300 LORI 22 Months Daughter of MR. MRS. ROBERT HIRSCHE LETHBRIDGE OPEN THURSDAY AND FRIDAY TltL 9 P.M. :I would not have thought so six months John replied. But paradoxical as it may sound, this is apparently what we have been doing all these years. Neither one of us has yet outgrown our childhood sense of dependency upon others, nor our rebellion against those on whom we feel dependent, or to whom we feel inferior." As they came to this surpris- ing insight John and Mary de- cided to try to be aware of how this characteristic of their per- sonalities was affecting their marriage. As they did so they were amazed at the number of P.EJ. women live longer OTTAWA (CP) The women of Prince Edward Island can Irak forward to a longer years on the Ca- nadians in any other part of the country. -The average life expectancy of the women of the Northwest Territories is less than half as long. At 23.9 years, their average is years less than for men of the same region. The 1969 figures from the Do- minion Bureau of Statistics were reported in the Commons Wednesday by Bruce Howard, parliamentary secretary to Trade Minister Jean-Luc Pepin, in reply to a written question by Barry Mather In most parts of the counfry, women have a longer average life than men with the biggest gap in Nova Scotia, where life expectancy for females is 69.8 years, for males 63.5. times when they became defen- sive about situations which real- ly did not warrant such emo- tion. John would feel dominated if Mary asked him to take out the garbage, or put on the storm windows or go shopping with her. Mary felt that John was being critical if he made a sug- gestion to her about keeping the house or minding the children or buying groceries. As John and Mary became aware of these things they be- gan to take a second look at their emotional reactions to- ward one another and to dis- cuss their feelings with one an- other. As they did so, a new sense of openness and freedom with one another began to de- velop. Gradually their feeling of being trapped began to dissi- pate and they discovered that though they had to be emotion- ally free, they did not have to be free of each other. In fact as their understanding develop- ed, they found a joy in being to- gether and had no desire to sep- arate. The public in and around Lethbridge and Coaldale has seen invited to attend a carol- ing expedition and coffee house at the Kate Andrews High School in Coa'.dale, which is acirig sponsored by the Inter- School Christian Fellowship jroup of the school. The group, which has been functioning for several years, has the aim of acquainting young people with Christianity and the love of Jesus Christ through fellowship, "rap" ses- sions, and other activities. These activities are co-ordi- nated under the leadership of president, Hilda Roever, a stu- dent at Kate Andrews, and under the sponsorship of Sandy Fricsen, a teacher at the school. Southern Alberta rep- resentative of ISCF is Larry Kirkpatrick of Calgary. All teens high school age and over have been asked to as- semble at the school at p.m. Cars are needed in order that the carollers may venture into the rural areas. At 9 p.m. the teens will return to the school to attend a coffee house in the cafeteria. Entertainment will be pro- vided by The New Wine, folk rock group from Leth- bridge. Ron Harris, a member of the group, will be there to talk with any person interestec in his former use of drugs and hallucinatory drugs. Mr. Harris spoke to students at the school recently. Anyone, high school age and over, is welcome. A light lunch will be provided. an d or town Friends of Mr. Fred Kenney will regret to learn that he is a patient in the Lethbridge Municipal Hospital. CHILL FIRST Onions can be cut tearless and odor-free if chilled in the refrigerator before slicing. Learn Hairdressing MARVEL BEAUTY SCHOOL REDUCED RATES-TERMS WRITE FOR FREE INFORMATION OVER METROPOLITAN STORE 326A 8th Ave. W., Calgary One other effect that all their hours of talk have produced is a new sense of trust between them. Now that they under- stand themselves and one an- other better, they find that they are not anxious or jealous abc-ut one another when they are separated. They can allow one another to be free! They can feel free when they are apart or together because of the loving trust that has developed between them. Never have John and Mary been so happy with one another as they are now. THE CLEANEST WASH IN TOWN THE Launderette 1263 3rd Avenue South ROBERT D.K1NNIBURGHD.D.S. ANNOUNCES THE QPENINP OF HIS OFFICE FOR THE PRACTICE OF GENERAL DENTISTRY LocatedAf: 1204 2nd AVE. A NORTH CENTRE VILLAGE MALL LETHBRIDGE, ALBERTA PHONE 32S-6929 WESTERN WEAR... FOR THE LOOK HE LIKES! Western HntJ Western Ties Western Shirt. and Bucklet Cowboy Boots Jeans and Jackets i Western Ornaments and Lamps WE CARRY A LARGE SELECTION OF TOP QUALITY SADDLES in several styles for the farmer, rancher and horseman! RIDING EQUIPMENT Bridles Bits Spurs Saddle Blankets Halters Breastplates Breastcollars ana1 Farriers Supplies You can buy with confidence at Baird's one of the foremost suppliers of riding equipment and western clothing! "WE SERVE THE WEST WITH THE BEST" 305 5th Street 5., Phone 327-3764 "LEATHER GOODS OF DISTINCTION" MM THE QUICK EASY WAY! We Mow Stock a Complete line of Lingerie It's fur. and economical to make slips, pettipants, panties, swim suits, peignoirs, gowns and many many novelty and gift items. Register at once for the most exciting sewing experience in your life! In just 6 two hour classes you can be an expert in making your lingerie and many gift items. Come in, or call us. Don't wait classes are filling fast. elna Makes An Idea! Christmas Gift for her! out- stretches them all! Tftl tin br till He ant tlKible. fat (iwry duty, ilreti iteas. EDGING STITCH far mikiflf inmiblt, Hutic tint mi other net. UDDER STITCH Itll feeifttiti Ml cliJtiC. ZIGZAG STITCH fir uicfc mrtiitiic, IttKMlf IKktll. mcr uikt. 408 5th Street South Phone 327-8877 or 327-8818 FREE HOME DEMONSTRATION-SEWING LESSONS GIVEN ;