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Lethbridge Herald Newspaper Archives

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Lethbridge Herald, The (Newspaper) - December 18, 1908, Lethbridge, Alberta LITHMIDOI, AkSCftTA, FRIDAY, DECEMBER II, IMtt. PAGE THMEE Framing W. W. (landlord THE PHOTOGRAPHER L_ r MOVING PICTURES ADVANCED VAUDEVILLE, In their Comedy Iketcl entitled The New Coachman 1. Doings of a iTool 2. Bobby's Practical Joke 3. cbievous Sketch 4. The Waii 5. Japanese Women Song.... When my Golden Hair Has Turned to Silver Grey Prices I5c and 29e CtitiiiMHS Perfornaice Starting at 7.30 A Few Good Storyettes David Warfield, the actor describing his European trip. "The best thing I saw was the Milan ca- he said. "The worst was Attractive Ideas For te Our Store contains a large assortment of orient- al art Goods. Christmas shoppers will find in it ap- propriate and. artistic presents in novelties, silk goods and Japanese ware. See oar toys for children. SHORT ORDERS AT ALL HOURS the English' barber. The English barber-uses a'dull'razor. He'lathers your nostrils and your lips. He brushes your hair with a revolving brush that runs by machinery. "I'll never forget my first exper- ience of a London, barber shop. It was a dim, stuffy room. I sat in a iiraight-bac-ked chair. The barber, though his razor was dull, cut me three times..... i 'Will you have a close -shave, be asked after going over my face once. i "I wiped a .ruddy.drops from rny chin. MI I get out of this chair I said 'I shall consider it such." had was! "You advertised that you found a purse, did you "I did." "You said it contained a sura of Lucile, 'a''-carefully brought up little girl of 'five years, returned from her first party in great glee. "I'was" a good girl, she i announced, "and talked nice all the time." "Did you remember to say some- thing pleasant to Mrs. Townsend just before her mother asked. "Oh, yes, I was the enthus- iastic reply. smiled and said 'I enjoyed myself, Mrs. Townsend. I had a lot better dinner than I thought.'I'd- have.'" money. "Yes." "In, fact, a very large sum of money." "That's "You mentioned, too, that the own- er could have the same by naming the sum found and describing the "Yes; go "That is all I wanted to ask." "But you will have to give a des- cription of the purse before you can claim it." "I haven't lost any purse." "You "No." "Then why on earth have you call- "Oh, merely to see what a man looks like who will find a very large sum of money., and then advertise the fact in the daily newspapers instead MILK RIVER NEWS. Milk.River, Dec. R. Lowe, manager of the Mackie ranch, spent a few days in Lethbridge on business. A number of the Milk River young people attended the club dance at Warner, and all report a good time. Ed. Herman, of Mazeppa, Minn., agent of the 0. W. Kerr Go., brought down a number ol landscekcrs to Milk Erver on Thursday An entertainment and dance was given at Fred Leffingwell's. A large crowd was "in attendance, and all en- joyed themselves at this the first social, event of country. Mrs. Oscar Fitzmaurice and Mrs. W. A. Satterlee leave Saturday for the East to spend the holidays with relatives and friends. The 3roung people are enjoying the skating on the river the last few days. Mrs. Satterlee and Miss Ellert took a drive out to Tomfohrs Monday and spent the day. Ben Ellert is helping F. Michailis move the old police barracks to the latter's farm, where they will be put in shape for granaries. Felix Miller was seen on our streets on Thursday. W. Brooks has opened his new lunch counter and restaurant. Mr. Charles Sproid moved into his new residence on Monday. W. K. Merriam, of Boston, Mass., is erecting a fine residence on his homestead, east of Milk River. Mrs. John McKnight, a daughter. This has been a busy week at the store, as everybody is getting sup- plies and getting for Xmas. Pat Murpny and the Homestead inspector- were riding through the country on Monday. The burly .prisoner stood unabash- ed before the judge. "Prisoner at the asked the Clerk of the Arraigns, "do ,you wish to challenge any of the The prisoner looked them OT carefully. he replied, "I'm not ex- actly wot you'r call in training, but I wouldn't mind a round or two with that, there fat old joshsr in the cor- ner." But there was nothing doing. "I don't want you get scared at this began the bald-head- ed man, "but I hope you've all got good nerves." The listeners "eagerly drew to- gether. began the narrator, "peo- ple lose their lives sometimes in the strangest ways. I know an Irishman a few months down on what he supposed was a. keg of black sand to have a smoke. After finishing the first pipe, lie knocked the live ashes into the keg. There happened to be a crowd of workmen standing by at the time "Many exclaimed a breath- less listener. "Many "Why? Nothing explosive about black sand, is i "Come in." The door opened to admit- the indi- vidual of benign aspect, who at once began: of having a good time with spoils. Good morning, sir." 'the Salt Rheum. HINTS FOR CHRISTMAS Do your shopping early; as you euti borrow itiouev. Eczema or Suit Rheum, as it is often called, is one of the most agonizing of skin diseases. It manifests itself in little round blisters, which contain an extremely irri- tat ilu Id. These break and subsequently a crust or scale is formed. intense burning, itching and smart- ing, especially at night or when the part ia exposed to any strong heat, are almost unbearable. The pre-eminent success which Burdock A unique- au African gift for a child of p.-t rhinocerous. the givt-r. cipient. no gift one made' Fortunatelv for the If you have a deaf friend, the prob- j leni of a gift is easy. Send him ai phonograph. j To a friend who does not read it is! A d itH.HM Aiv.1 iHJU Ib I Hlood liitters has mot wills in permanently I ii safe 10 send one or the latest novels i curiuii A disease or such seventy is due io L it hs wtaderful blood cleansing and purify- hy a woman author. j ing properties. properties. Ko other remedy has done, or so much for are almost driven to distraction with the terrible torture, as our thousands of signed testimonials can testify to. Mrs. John O'Connor, Burlington, X.S., writes years I suffered with Salt Rheum. I tried a dozen different niecli- but moot of them only made it worse. I was-ad vised to try Burdock Blood Bit- ters. I got a bottle and before I had taken half a dozen doses I could see a change so I continued its use and now 1 am completely qured. 1 canmt. say too much for your wonderful nioilicimv' For Kile by ail druggist and dealers. tain thing could not have happened excent bv a miracle, but the witness make an automobile at go j out and earn Then give itj to an experienced 'friend to buy a good one for you. I In buying diamonds, be careful to; have them screened. Otherwise you may find a number of small ones among your purchase.-'. Two Per- formances Daily; M5 and p.m. 9.15 THEATRE T Q N l G ZAMLOCH CO. Illusionists ANNE ALLAIRE The Champion Club Swinger 3000 Feet of Moving Pictures The pleasturtest' gift you can give is a blank cheque. Of course your friend jiiay be disappointed when he pr-tseiiis it. but that will bu after i i A beautiful painting can be made j if you have the right water colors, i The next attraction, a rural come- Illustrated Songs "SI PLUNKARD" TONIGHT. some asperity the prosecutor said i was not very strong on miracles, obtaining the colors, study for! fly will be at he dodged each Finally, with j ten yearsj in som.. art Oliver's Hall tonight. This is one or i j'ou may be ready to delight yourUiie most laughable plays ever put' the stage, but- at the same time ____ -I it interesting plot. It is pre- dow on the .thirty-fifth floor of ;thej' a' it is better to pick ouijseiiUHl by an excellent cast, with the Singer Building, deliberately plung- j something that will be useful to the-j famous character ed downward head first to the pav- recipient. A Morris chair is always "Now, sir, follow me closely. Sup- j frien jSi pose the deceased had gone to a win- useful, and can easily be made by any one who is a trained carpenter. Buy a Ivlorria chair at any store, get ewis in the title comedian role The. J. C, piece is the production of a clever come- dian who knows the public wants, and lias set himself 'at work to meet Sir Ian Hamilton, wlio has thirty five years' military service to Ms credit, tells an amusing story of a little incident that happened in South Africa while he was acting as chief of staffv-to. Lord Kitchener. He had occasion to visit rather a large depot of which- a young officer was in command. Going through certain papers Gen. Hamilton found that these were not quite in order, and at last said rather wearily to the of- ficer. "You know this sort of thing will not do at all. What do you sup- pose your brains were given you "I ara sure I do not know, was the cheerful reply. "Since I came here I have worked sixteen hours a day and more. I have acted as mule teamster, porter, van guard, supply clerk, station master, order- ly, room clerk, typist and a dozen otHer things. I think if I had not been endowed with brains I might have managed to take on two or three more jobs as well, but as it ia I must admit I am somewhat handi- capped." Sir Ian Hamilton was forced to laugh, and shortly after, the young tached to staff. officer found himself at- the general's 'personal The prosecuting attorney in a New York -court was trying to get the bulky witness to admit that a cer- CHIEF OF EDMONTON POLICE Edmonton, Dec. J. Lancy, of Montreal, has been appointed chief of police of Edmonton at an initial salary of per month to succeed Major, who resigned recently. Coal Delivered Anywhere in Town C.O.D. All kinds of Draying and Contract Work executed with despatch Hayr Transfer Co. RING UP 180 ing stones Ibelow, and instead of be- ing crushed into a shapeless mass, had gotten up calmly and walked away anhurt. Wouldn't you call that a "No, answered the witness, your friend the one you bought. The! turns and quaint characters, and-'eti- "I should say that was quite an acci- will be useful in your own j livened by that indc-finable snap and the necessary material, and copy it j the demand. The result is a rural as closely as you Then sendj comedy dn-irna full 'of dent." The prosecutor was staggered buti he came right back: "All that an house for lighting fires, etc. There is no message of love or af- j Section which cannot be eonveved bv i go which is the life and soul of n i rural comedy drama.. MUST RETIRE AT 65. accident, if you. please, fol- means of a book, says somebody or instead of walking j This is stretching things a I away he should get up and walk j bit, but it is more or less true in1' Umversity of Minnesota. Puts an Age straight to the elevator, ascend again to trie mirty-nran Hoor, again jump from the .window to the pavement, and again walk away unharmed. What would you call that, sir? Wouldn't that be- a drawled .the witness. "I hardly think so. That would look to me like a co-incidence, at' least." An audible titter ran around the courtroom. But, undaunted, the pro- secutor returned to the fray. "Now, Mr. he said, most solemnly, "think! This man (sup- posedly) fell three hundred and fifty feet, striking his head on. the pave- ment. Unhurt, he went back and re- peated the feat. Now, then, suppose this marvellous man goes back and for the third time escapes all in- jury. Now, sir, 'do you dare claim that to be other than a "Oh, came the quick reply. "That would-be a The prosecuting attorney fainted awav. Rosecrans W. Pills bury, of New Hampshire, who has been defeated twice for the Eepublicat-ion nomina- tion for turned up at his office bright and early on the morn- ing after his second rejection by the party convention, and told his friends this story: i A man was once walking along the l street when a door flew open and a man carne bumping down the steps to the sidewalk. Picking him up the essentials. Limit on Professors' Services. Be careful to suit the book, to your j Minneapolis, Minn., Dec.. friend. For instance, do not give a gents of the .University Minnesota light friend a heavy book, nor -a j have decided that contracts with dear friend a cheap book. A heavy} members of the faculty should' ex- book would tax the strength, of a j pire when the instructor :reaches-'the' light friend. Furthermore, do not [age of 65 years. -The new rule will present a book with a brown binding! be.put 'in force at the close of the to any one whose library-is decorat-! present school year. It, will ed in green. j sbc well known professors to retire i June. All' will-be eligible to the A charming gift is a home-made benefits of the Carnegie Foundation, pie or piano. Any of your friends will tell you how to make th? pie. I To make the piano all that is needed! is 100 of mahogany, ten bales of j wire, one elephant's tusk for the i notes, and twenty years' experience, i AT THE LYCEUM Zaitiloeh and Co., at the theatre this week are' the Lyceum best of the season thus far hi the line ot Zamloch has a table, a drum and