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Lethbridge Herald Newspaper Archives

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Lethbridge Herald, The (Newspaper) - August 6, 1974, Lethbridge, Alberta August ft, 1974 THE LETHBRIDGE HERALD 11 Lynne Funeral fripperies support Vanluven 'dotty English9 suspicion David .Bates'.parrot is dead. You say, so what? Wee critters are going to their reward all the time, through old age, disease or ownercafelessriess. What, then, is all this fuss over a common parrot? Well you may-ask. For David Bates' Grimsby (His Most Gracious Majesty, the Lord of Grimsby of Katmandu to you plebes ANDERSON SUPPLIES LTD. WARNER, ALBERTA Sales 642-3845 Parts 642-3944 -NEW 1974 MODELS- USED TRUCKS cood TRACTORS USED CARS BUY NOW AND SAVE! not intimates of the feathered phenomenon) was no common' parrot. Grimsby didn't have just any old garbage pail for his last resting place. Even a dignified backyard interr- ment in a Gucci shoe box wasn't grand enough. According to news reports, Grimsby lay in state three weeks (em- balmed, I do. hope) on a silken bed; his coffin was covered, with car- nations (I'd settle for a simple wreath of artificial poems by Shelley and Wordsworth were read over his inert frame (sure- ly a few simple stanzas from Rod McKuen would have been more within Grimsby's bird-brained Yessiree, Bates, an .English antique dealer, didn't skimp on his pet's send-off. The pampered parrot went to that big birdcage in the sky wearing a diamond ring on his beak and "a 'lit- tle crown' on his head, sur- rounded by silver- candelabra and palm leaves. Given such fripperies, is it any wonder the bird's.funeral cost Bates Such doings, only contribute to. the average Canadian's suspi- cion that all Englishmen are a dotty lot. The news article spared us details 'on Grimsby's day-of-reckoning attire presumably only his glossy" plumage or the cut of his coffin a fine_.oak, perhaps, encrusted with sculpted birdseed rosettes? Bates apparently regard- ed Grimsby as his "per- sonal friend." I should have such a friend: I'm ready to settle for a cheap cremation, my ashes to be collected in an old soup can and sprinkled o'er the rag- ing waters of the Oldman. Obviously, people are go- ing bonkers over pets. The manufacture of pet food, including cheese-flavored snacks for gerbils, yet; is a proliferating circus; pet stores are doing a booming business; veterinarians are making house calls and pet cemeteries and pet restaurants are springing up. Our scense of perspec- tive is going to the dogs and cats and canaries STORES USE OUR "Firestone CREDIT PLAN OR... Corner 3rd Ava. and 8th St. S. Phone 327-8548 PICK fl PAIR of SOD'S ft re stone POLYESTER '500" 30 Whrt "PRICE "I TRUCK TIRE ENDURANCE OF WIDE SS-100 RETREADS! for your camper or light truck A wide aggressive 7-nb iroad design wnh racing sipcs Provides excellcn: performance. Backed hy ihe new (ire guafamec. 7 75 !J 7 75 15CANRCPLACEF7S'TJ f 73 1b 1. Wheel Alignment 2. Static Front Wheel Balance FRONT END SPECIAL 3. Outer Front Wheel Bearing Repack ;