Page 2 of 30 Sep 1896 Issue of Freeborn County Standard in Albert-Lea, Minnesota

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Freeborn County Standard (Newspaper) - September 30, 1896, Albert Lea, MinnesotaCOMING What makes the sky so bright and blue? The earth around it so wondrous fair9 The woods and fields are full of song, A thousand sweets are in the air. The golden sunbeams fill the place Where once the heaviest shadows lay, And all outdoors seems glad because My darling’s coming home to-day. But yesterday ’twas dark as night, And full of desolation, too; And thoughts of ill, so dark and chill. Appeared with every breeze that blew. But with the morn a message came That drove the shadows all away, And right along I’ve sung this song-My darling’s coming home to-day! How long and wearisome the time That we were doomed apart to dwell! Ah, was it months? or was it years? Alas! alas! I cannot tell. Each day appeared a century Of loneliness and bitter pain; My heart at war, and longing for My darling to come home again. And now- the waiting time is o’er: Hope’s sweetest fruition fills my breast; And dismal doubts and glooms and fears, Those evil birds, have fled their nest. All things around a radiance wear, As if in festival array; And smiling so they surely know Mr darling’s coming home to-day. —Josephine Pollard, in N. Y. Ledger. BATTLE OUTSIDE THE HEADS NE morning-, as Jack Delafield was breakfasting o ii board the cruiser Idaho, a telegram was handed him which he calmly proceeded to open; but after glancing over its contents, the placid serenity of his countenance gave way to a look of excitement. Jumping up, he shouted to his lazier mcss-mates who had not yet emerged from their state-rooms: “Boys, the war is on,” In a second, heads were thrust out, some of the possessors even venturing into the ward-room considerably more en deshabille than custom regulations permitted. But Delafield’# telegram was of so much interest and importance that such trifling conventional! ies were forgotten, and his curious brother-offi-cei-s crowded around him, clamoring loudly for the news. “Listen,” said the lieutenant, “ITI read it to you: “Washington, D. C., Get. 20, 189—. To Lieut. John Delafield, I'. S. N.. V. S. S. Idaho, San Francisco Harbor:    Regard yourself detached from Idaho. Proceed Immediately to Mare island navy yard. Take command of the Bainbridge, and prepare for active service at earliest possible moment. Commandant ordered place at your disposal’ every available means to hasten work.    HULBERT “Secretary ” “What do you fellows think of that?” said Jack. “Lucky dog.” “Wish I were in your place.” They all seemed pleased at Delafield’# stroke of luelV. Fortune was truly smiling on him, for he had been selected for this hazardous and important duty out of half a hundred other officers of his ow n rank, each one as eager as himself to command the little craft, the Bainbridge, of which wonders were expected. He had been chosen by the secretary of the navy and had received his preparatory orders, which were to the effect that he would be retained on board the Idaho until hostilities were imminent, when he would be given his new- command. Meanwhile the work of fitting her for sea had been pushed at the navv-vard with all dispatch. The Bainbridge was the first of our new semi-submarine magnetic torpedo-boats, those marvels of American ingenuity and skill. Jack started for the navy-yard at once, and on arriving reported to the commandant, Admiral Dana, who told him in his bluff, kindly w ay to go ahead and fit out his craft as rapidly as possible, taking whatever was necessary for her equipment without the usual formalities, adding cheerily: “We can attend to all that after you come back, Delafield.” As he stands there before the admiral, receiving his instructions, let us glance at the officer upon whom, perhaps, will hang the result of the battle very soon to be fought outside the Heads. Tall, erect and finely formed, Lieut. Delafield impresses one instantly as a man of no mean physical strength. His face gives evidence of courage, firmness and great will power—just. the attributes, “BOYS, THE WAR IS ON.’ in fact, which should most properly belong to the man ordered to command an unknown quantity like the Bainbridge, yet to be tried by the test of actual battle. When he leaves the office of tile admiral, his elastic step and easy carriage show that his task has not overburdened him with anxiety, but, on the contrary, indicates confidence in himself and assurance of his ability to carry the work before him to a successful issue, On his way down to the wharf where t-V? Bainbridge lay, he passed groups of officers eagerW discussing the latest news. All had some friendly or congratulatory remark for him; but, scarcely stopping to reply, he hurried on board his new command. The Bainbridge was one of the latest additions to our fleet, and while it w as anticipated that she would accomplish great things, the only real test had come sooner than anyone would have prophesied. Workmen were swarming over her in such numbers that she resembled a human bee-bive. Her length was probably in the neighborhood of 150 feet, but her narrow' beam and sharply sloping sides on the w ater. She was painted an olive-green, to secure invisibility at night. The most prominent objects iii sight on her deck were a low conning-tower and two elongated hatches, one forward and one aft. These were for the disappearing magnetic torpedo guns, and were arranged to protect the torpedoes until they were needed, at which time the guns were elevated by electricity, trained on the enemy and tired, the whole operation requiring but a few* seconds. The motive power of die craft was also electricity, obtained from Tesla storage batteries of the latest type, giving the boat a speed of 40 knots an hour. Within two days Lieut. Delafield had completed the outfit of the Bainbridge, and had stored on board four of those terrible engines of destruction, the magnetic torpedoes, which were of the ordinary cigar shape, having the energy for propulsion stored in a heavy fly-wheel revolving in a longitudinal, vertical plane at a rate of 10,000 revolutions a minute. This application of the principle of the gyroscope gave them an almost unerring directness of path under wrater, but, besides this, within the secret chamber w ere concealed magnets of great strength, which drew the torpedoes straight onward toward their prejr. No maneuvering, however skill fill, on the part of the commander of a ship attacked could avail against the relentless power of these magnets, and once a torpedo wus launched fairly in the direction of an enemy’s vessel, her doom was only a matter of seconds. When the intended target was struck, the explosion of 150 pounds of gun-cotton would fulfill the mission of the torpedo, and cause the proud battle ship, stricken in some vital part, to reel back under the shock, then perhaps make a feeble effort to escape, but in vain. In a moment only a seething, bubbling spot covered with wreckage in the midst of the ocean would mark the grave of a Goliath of the deep, done to death bv this marine David. Little wonder then that Delafield had every confidence in the Bainbridge. But his spirits fell when he read in the newspapers, a few mornings after, that a large fleet of the enemy had left its rendezvous and was proceeding in the direction of San Francisco. This filet consisted of eight first-class battle skips, ten armored cruisers, together with twenty protected cruisers and smaller vessels. Against this array the United States could only bring the battle ships Oregon (fiag), Iowa, Massachusetts, Indiana and Texas; the armored cruisers Idaho, Maine and Brooklyn; the protected cruisers Olympia, Charleston, Columbia, Newark, Minneapolis. Philadelphia and San Francisco. as well as several gunboats. This fleet was anchored in the bay, chared for action and ready to proceed to sea as soon as carrier pigeons from the scouts should bring the news of the approach of the hostile vessels. Near by were the eoast defense monitors Monterey, Puritan, Terror, Amphitrite and Miantono-mah, and also Delafield’# torpedo boat, the Bainbridge. Jack had gone on board the flagship Oregon as soon as he had anchored after his run down from the navy yard, in order to report to Admiral Woodbridge and to receive his orders. The admiral told him that it was his intention to go outside, meet the enemy, and, if possible, cripple him to such an extent as to prevent the bombardment of the city,and that the Bainbridge and eoast-defense vessels were to be held in readiness to guard the entrance to the harbor and cover the retreat of the fleet in ease it might be compelled to withdraw. When Jack left the admiral’s cabin he was confident he would have an opportunity to add fame to his own name .md fresh laurels to the long list of daring naval achievements accomplished by John Paul Jones, Decatur, Preble, Bainbridge (for whom his little vessel was named), Biddle, Lodgers, Farragut, Cushing and a host of others. Throughout the fleet that day there was an expectant hush as of a gladiator resting previous to some mighty effort. All pre po rations were completed, final letters written, and farewells said, for, though each officer and man hoped for a favorable outcome, everyone, even to the meanest powder-boy, knew that the morrow' would most probably bring a struggle so terrible and deadly that many of them would never return. During Hie early morning twilight of the next day a pigeon fluttered wearily down to the cote on the flag-ship, and in aliglitingseta shrill electric bell to ringing. The faithful little messenger had arrived with its momentous tidings in the shape of a tiny note in a quill secured firmly under its wing. This was soon detached and conveyed to the admiral. In less time than it takes to tell it, the red and white signal-1 ights were flashing out the order to get under way. Soon the rattle of chains wa: heard as the anchors were hove up: and when daylight broke the fleet was seen steaming majestically out through the Golden Gate, the Oregon Varner Everything was ready for action except opening the magazine, getting out the ammunition, and loading the guns. All hands were intently scanning the horizon ahead and on each bow to catch the first glimpse of the smoke of the enemy’s fleet. The silence, punctuated only by the rhythmic throb of the engines, was at last broken by “Sail ho!” from the upper fighting-top. “Where away?” replied the officer of the deck. “One point and a half on the port bow, sir—smoke!” “Beat to general quarters” is instantly ordered. The men spring to th* guns. which are at once loaded; the turrets are trained from side to side and the guns elevated and depressed to see that everything is working smoothly. The alarm proves to be a false one. for the vessel is made out to lie the San Fran cisco, one of the scouts, steaming in at full speed. She runs close to the flagship while the admiral questicns her commanding officer regarding the num hers and course of the enemy, for the purpose of verifying the pigeon message. The hostile fleet is not more than 20 miles ahead! Again the watch ing is resumed, and within an hour the smokes of a large number of vessels are made out. The fires are forced by power ful fans, and the increased speed of the fleet rapidly lessens the intervening distance. The supreme struggle is ai hand. On** ships steam on in column, ready for the bloody fray. To recount In detail the action of that day would lie to chronicle daring deeds, heroic acts.^and bravery skin to rashness,but all of no avail against such overwhelming odds. As night fell, Delafield, from the ,    ,    I defense vessels, inside the bar, sighted . the remnant of our fleet standing in. still stubbornly fighting and protecting the weaker or more disabled ships Shortly the enemy was uncovered, and monitors opened fire, compelling an abandonment of the harassing pursuit. The enemy remained just out of range, while the fearful wreck of what remained of Admiral Woodbridge*# force crawled slowly into the harbor. As the Oregon, guarding the rear, passed the Bainbridge, the admiral signaled briefly, but significantly: “Do your duty.” The night is dark and windy. An ominous stillness in the air presages an on-coming gale. No moon or stars are shining to aid the enemy, but instead the sky is covered with hard, leaden-gray clouds, and a low bank of fog is sweeping in from the westward. The conditions are propitious, and Delafield prepares for his dash. He takes the Bainbridge close inshore through Bonita channel, and barely escapes being caught by one of the enemy’s gunboats, but, turning on more current, he rushes silently ahead and clear of danger. When almost within hearing of the breakers on Duxbury reef, he makes a wide detour in order to approach from seaward, for from this direction an attack is hardly to be expected. Nevertheless, he has to go a considerable distance out to reach a favorable position. He reaches his station at ll: 15 o’clock, and iii another quarter of an hour the monitors will open fire toward that flank of the enemy opposite to which is Delafield. They will keep up this cannonade for ten minutes, to effect a diversion. As soon as this firing has ceased, Jack’s work will begin. Boom! bang! go the great ten-inch and twelve-inch guns. It is a trying time for Jack, but he sees the effect of the ruse, and is again congratulating himself on his luck. The search-light# are all playing inshore of him, the enemy entirely oblivious of the fact that danger is lurking in their rear. Haif-past eleven! As suddenly as it began, the firing ceases, and Delafield, taking his stand in the little conning-tower, orders the crew to their stations. Slowly the Bainbridge starts ahead, then faster and faster she goes, until, fairly flying, she brings into view the weaker vessels forming the outer line. But Jack disdains such pigmy prey. Safely she flies past the gunboats, but IHE FARMING WORLD. FROZEN MILK BLOCKS. PROTECTOR FOR TREES. Often Done. He had just returned from an Eu- Wit of the Joyous Lunatic. The teeth of the oiu gentleman who Copenhagen is Building a Plant for Their Manufacture. Milk may be bought by the brick in summer, just the same as some kinds of ice cream. It will be frozen solid, though, aud if intended for use tis soon as received in the household the lacteal fluid for the tea or coffee will have to be chipped off with the handle of the knife or fork, according to the quantity desired in the drink. Perhaps at the Waldorf, at Delmonico’s and other resorts of the wealthy the frozen milk may be seen in cubes, like sugar, or in pats, like. butter, and a man may ord^r a lump of milk with his coffee and rolls, as well as a lump of sugar or “another pat of butter, please.” From a fad frozen milk has grown to be more or less of a necessity in the warmer countries in Europe, and some of the larger dairymen in and about New York are seriously discussing the practicability of introducing the custom as an experiment. It is claimed that if the milk should be Aret frozen it is just as impervious to the gathering of disease germs as is boiled milk or water. Many persons do not take kindly to the idea of frozen milk, or even nr*3 • served milk. Fresh milk in cans, they claim, can be kept fresh for 16 hour'*, and if It does not remain sweet for the* length of time they conclude that the How to Stake Oat a Large Orchard with Very Little Labor. The cut shows a “rnpie but effective method of supporting young trees, especially where a large orchardJs set. In such ease, the saving of a little labor at each tree amounts to a great deal In tha case of the whole orchard. ropean trip and was telling of his ad- was frequently late to breakfast came together upon some hard substance ‘I actually I with a thrilling shock. The old gentle- had the distinguished honor of playing I man w ho was frequently late to break- Medicine is fully as important and beneflcfalas ventures. “And above all,” he said, Fall poker with a king.” The man in the linen coat had listened in silence up to this point, but The trunk now his lip curled scornfully as he replied: “That’s nothing. I once played with four kings.” “Really?” “Sure. Four kings and an ace.”— Chicago Post. SLIGHTLY TERMINAL. PROTECTOR FOR TREES. of the tree rests in the angle between three stakes, and is held there by a strip of cloth used as a string. The cloth is twisted about so as to have a fold of it between the tiunk and the stakes, to prevent chafing. The three stakes are bound together by a bit of wire. The fast turned an injured glance upon the landlady. The joyous lunatic smiled cheerfully. “Madam,” said the old gentleman, “as a general thing I do not criticise the victuals you see fit to place before us. but in this case I am obliged to. I have, I am certain, found some foreign substance in the hash.” The face of the joyous lunatic lighted up: “No substance,” he remarked, “is foreign in hash.”—Chicago Tribune. An X-Ray Portrait. The artist knit his brow. “I wish to picture the heroine with . a No. 12 waist,” he remarked. “But I where, in that event, is her liver lobe?’* !“Oh, I can make room for that,” rejoined the author. “I will just say that she has no heart.” Thus it is to be seen how the muses | advance hand in hand and are generous ly disposed to mutual concession.—De troit Tribune. Spring Medicine, and thebes Fall Medicine Is food's Sarsaparilla The Best—in fact the One True Blood Purifier. Hnnd’c Pi I Ic cure Liver Ills; easy to I I WUU ^ * * * ■-* take, easy to operate. 25c. milk was not fresh    when    pour*d    into j eloth will stretch and    loosen sufficiently or that    the    cans    were    not    so that the growing    trunk of the tree will not be bound at    all. A large orchard can lie staked    out in this way with very little labor, and the result will prove very satisfactory, as everyone of the three stakes acts as a brace—something that cannot be said of such as are driven about the tree perpendicularly. -—Country Gentleman. the cans, clean. The trade in foreign importations of frozen milk and cream is yet in its infancy. but advices recently received by American dairymen indicate that the industry will lie speedily developed to greater proportions, especially ’n Holland. The Belgian government designs to increase the trade at an annual out lay of $50,000, and in Copenhagen, th" capital of Denmark, a company has been formed and arrangement * have been completed for the regular export of frozen milk. The necessary plant ha* been erected and contracts have lieen made already for the delivery of 110,000 pounds per week. which trill lie sent to all parts of the world in bricks or blocklike ice. Tf the lines laid down in European countries were closely followed the health inspector would arrange these lists so that simultaneous occurrence of infectious diseases in a number o' families served bv the same ice-milk- ‘Jobson, I do believe that if yea were A mandible Theory. Since that fellow moved in next to me and is trying to learn how to play j the violin, I have a new theory as to the ! burning of Rome.” “What is it?” “I’m satisfied that Nero was sitting J at the front window playing a fiddle A QUEER BELIEF. The Place of Torment to Which Wicked Buddhists Are Consigned. The place of torment to which ail wicked Buddhist# are to be assigned on the day of final reckoning is a terrible place of punishment. The Buddhists hell is a eort of apartment house, divided into eight “easy stages.” In tho first the poor victim is compelled to walk for untold ages in his bare feet over hills thickly set with red-hot needles, points upward. In the second stage the skin is carefully filed or rasped from the body and irritating* mixtures are applied. In the third stage the nails, hair and eyes are plucked out and the denuded body sawed and planed into all sorts of fantastic shapes. The fourth stage is that of “sorrow- given your choice between me and your and    of    the    in    rhp    b]ock    took    j    ful    lamentations    ”    In    the    fifth    the    lef pipe, you would hesitate. “That’s where you make a mistake, Mrs. Jobson. A pipe soothes and comforts a man in his old age.*'—N. Y. Her ald. to throwing bombs at him. Free Press. -Detroit GARDEN AND ORCHARD. Evaporating is a good way of saving fruit when there is not a good market for it. Some varieties of fruit, like the cherry, after they start to grow, need little if any pruning. Cultivate all orchards sparingly now. Give the trees time to ripen their wood before winter. When there is an over-supply of fruit thf fallen fruit can lie fed to the hogs to good advantage. Iii tending any kind of fruit to mar- Knemic^ Ever Afterward. Genevieve—Oh, Beatrice, did Charlie I Chillingworth propose to you this morn-1 ing? Beatrice (blushing)—Why, whatever can have made you ask that question? Ye—yes. he proposed, and v\ e’rc to be j married iii a year, if papa will give his consent. Genev ie\©—There, I owe Charlie a box of candy! Ile bet me that you’d jump at ( him if Ii** asked you, and I give you ; credit for having more sens-*.—Cleve- i land Leader. A Great hem*. Jones—You say you want to make money quick? Smith—I do. That’s what I’m nft^r. “W ell. here is your chance. The shad lays 50,000 eggs in 24 hours.” “Well, what of itT “H**ar me out. Put your wits to work and Let up a cross between the shad and the barnyard hens, and you can make SlOO.OuO a day.”—Texas Siftings. Mach Cry and No Wool Let dogs delight to bark and bite— You’ve h-ard that same remark. But when it comes to fistic fight. The human pugs just bark. -Town Topics. ket it will pay to sort carefully before man woald J* promptly diworncd and I packing for shipment. | th. mischief checked.—V V. Journal.    In tha seIection of tre(,R for plant, ing look carefully after the roots and see that thev are all right. One advantage with low-headed tree# ! is that it is easier to gather the fruit from them when it is ripe. PROTECTION FOR HAY. A Good Structure, Although There Is Not Very Mach to It. A good way, even if it is somewhat old, of cheaply protecting hay and fodder is to make an open structure with a roof that can be raised or lowered, linger lo«grr ll HWi&t I Imjsr longer LL i Linger long longer linger linger L*^f» I SHE TEARS ALONG. not quickly enough to avoid discovery. On he goes, fearlessly taking the Bainbridge straight toward the battleships. “Stand by,” he sings out down the voice-tubes to the torpedo compartments, and back conies the hearty answer:    “All ready, sir.” Now he is but a short distance from the nearest ship. He turns two electric switches and sees the torpedo guns elevated and trained. Then amid a show er of shell;, he presses a firing-key, and the forward tor[H*do is launched and speeds on its errand of destruction. No need to watch the effect; the magnet is as sure as fate. Meantime, the Bainbridge’* course is changed, so that she may run parallel to the column of battle ships, and the empty gun is lowered. A second later the after torpedo is on its way for the next battle ship, and Delafield has done half his work. Long ere this the brave little craft has been the center of a smother of foaming water, lashed into impotent fury by the crashing, bursting shells. But her great speed saves her from annihilation. She tears along w ith search-] ights flaking on her like an aurora and with tho waves dashing wildly over her. Two more of the enemy’s most powerful ships sent to the bottom complete her errand. The only damage on the Bainbridge has happened to Delafield himself. A piece of shell has inflicted an ugly wound in his shoulder, and though exhausted by the intense strain and weak from loss of blood, he steer# his victorious vessel into the protection of the harbor, then falls senseless to the deck. Not long after, while recovering hi# strength, Jack received a very official-looking document covered with formidable seals. It contained the information that he had received the thanks of congress and that he had been promoted to the rank of captain for his gallantry in sinking four of the enemy’s ships, thereby causing a withdrawal of their fleet and preventing the bombardment of the city of San Francisco.—San Francisco Argonaut. Better take a little time to water th© young growing trees now than to run the risk of losing the tree. Aliout the only objection to low-headed trees is that the branches interfere j with the work of cultivating. Early in the fall, when the growth is completed and the wood ripened, is a good time to prune apple trees. All things considered, there are few fruit# that can be grown as economically as the grapeor the cherry. While cherries thrive in a rich soil, too much moisture is injurious. Hence the necessity for providing good drainage. Whatever tends to promote the general health and thrift of the tree will also help to free both tree and fruit Lorn blight and scab.—St. Louis Republic. BOGUS PARIS GREEN. side of the body and the denuded head ar© carefully roaster. Yourn, the Buddhist Satan, superintending the work In the sixth stage the arms are toro from the body and thrown into an immense vat among the eyes, nail# and hair previously removed. Then in plain hearing of the sore-footed, blind, maimed, roasted and bleeding victim the whole horrid mass is pounded into jelly. In the seventh stage the nth *r side of the victim and his feet are roasted brown and then comes the eighth and last stage, in which the candidate is thrown into the bottomless pit of perdition. The Ba* I a Disk boat. The new disk steamship, the invention of M. Bazin, was launched at St. Denis dockyard. Admiral Coulombeaud. who has a high repute among French naval authorities, is said to be a firs# believer in the possibilities of this new invention, and he has computed that only one-twenty-eigbth of the power re-I quired to drive an ordinary boat ie need-\ cd for a Bazin craft of the name size and I speed. The diskbout cf M. Bazin is , by no means the first attempt to apply I the roller principle to navigation, but heretofore the rollers havs been made I to perform the duty of poddle-whee or propellers; in the r. nv boat they ara I mere! v devices to overcome friction, and th** report of M. Bazin’.' exp 'r'ments indicate that he has been markedly sue-! cessfnl. Child Marriages in India. In India there are 100,000 boy# and 627,000 girls under the age of 14 who are legally married, while 8,600 boys and 24.000 girls who have riot attained the age of four are under marriage bonds as arranged by their parents. The act of worship is among ail creation indigenous ami peculiar to man.—MelVille. Fig. 1-HAY AND FODDER SHED. as necessary to receive and best protect the hay or fodder beneath. As usually built, it is a four-post affair, one post (strongly Let in the ground) at each corner; but if the shed is one of consH erable length six posts are used, as shown in the accompanying cut (Fig. I). What in an ordinary building con stitute the plates -4 here become a frame, which RT each corner em braces the post in j manner shown at A in Fig. 2. If any posts additional to those at the corners are put down, an iron stirrup is used, as depicted at IL The cover, or roof. over the frame tiered acts of kindness and of love*— made ber appear like a needle floating Bainbridge, and the officers on the coast’ Vt adsworth* A Boom to Siberia. Russian peasants are emigrating to Siberia in numbers that alarm the goz-ermnment. The part of the Siberian railroad opened has been blocked by the rush, 13,000 persons bewig encamped at Tchelyabursk in the middle of May, waiting for transportation. So far this year 145,000 have emigrated, whole villages being left without inhabitants, to the great embarrassment of the elder, who is responsible for the ment of taxes, and finds only desert© farms on which to levy. Plentiful, cheap land is the attraction in Siberia. It is reported that the government will stop the banishing of criminals to Siberia, and will use only the island of Saghalien, the northern provinces and the prison districts as receptacles fur convicts. FIG. t. should be made of the lightest obtain able material that will turn rain. When raised or lowered it is secured in place by iron pins stuck into holes bored in the posts for that purpose. A jack screw, if to be had (two jackscrews would be better) will be a great help in raising the adjustable roof. There is a jackscrew made that clamps to an upright post, which would herp be just the thing. This is the cheapest possible hay protector, as there is hardly anything to it but the roof.—G. IV. Waters, in Journal of Agriculture. It Is Sold in Lsrge Quantities to California Krait Groarers. Mr. B. M. I^elong, at the meeting of the StaL* Horticultural society of California, is reported to have stated a# follows ; “In the past two yea;# enormous quantities of paris gre^n have been sold to growers, much of which was ct very Inferior quality. The result# were equally as poor, and many grow-< rs have thus become prejudiced against its use. Samples of paris green have I'een examined with astonishing results. I } Several samples, although of nearly the i ame shade of eolbr as the pure paris j green, were found to be a mixture of . prussian blue and chrome yellow, clay , md chalk. Others were lound to con- I lain no rrsenious acid, the fault lies with the fruit grower# themselves, for we have continually ad-\ ised them to use the pure article, which costs 20 cents per pound. This advice has been disregarded to a considerable extent end the cheapest grades havo been purchased, with little or no results. It was only last week that an extensive ripple grower visited several stores in quest of paris green, lefused the pure at 20 cents, and had a large quantity shipped to him ai 4% cents per pound. You can therefore imagine tho results re will have.”—Pacific Rural Press. “SAY AU REVOIR. BDT NOT GOODBY.’ Th** Other Way. Julian—I notice that you do not allow the w aiters to dress in th** reg Cation swallow-tail. Hotel Prop.—No. indeed. They and the swells looked too much alike. Julian—Whose kick compelled you to make the change? The swells’? Prop.—No, indeed. The waiters’ Y. World. N. A Bad Break. Doctor (after spraying the lady’# throat)—Madame, it’s a plenum* to treat you—you’ve got such line control of your tongue. The Patient’s Husband—Hi re, let's have your bill. It’s evident you don't know what you’re talking about.—Cleveland Plaindealer. Darkened Stables for Cows. Every farmer and dairyman should have a stable that can be darkened, in which to put his cows morning and evening during milking time. Being in a darkened room the flies do not trouble j them, and they stand quietly while being milked, and are glad to be freed j from the pests which torture them ; when outside the stable. A cow must have the patience of Job to stand quietly and be milked, while the flies are sucking blood from almost every part of her body; and because she kicks and 3 pav- fl0pg jjer tajj ar0nnd to drive off these sertc.l pests< patience of the milker becomes taxed, and the poor beast is too frequently beaten and kicked, because she tries to rid herself of the flies that are biting her. Try a dark stable for milking, and you will never be satisfied without one thereafter.—Rural World. Indian Coffee. India sent Europe from the 1st of September, IS95, to August 31, 1896, 1,-270,000 400-pound bales of cotton. Of India’s yield, England takes only tea to fifteen per cent., Japan 15 per cent, and China a small amount, the bulk-70 to 75 per cent.—going to continental Europe. —The best portion of a good man's life is his little nameless, unremem- Summer Salad. In a salad bowl put first a layer of fresh, crisp water cress, then a layer of I thinly-sliced cucumbers which have been soaked in cold water for 15 min-jutes, then a teaspoonful of minced ! chives, then another layer of cucum-, hers, and around the edge a light border of cresses. When ready to serve, pour a French dressing over it and toss it over until well mingled. This is a nice salad to serve with broiled fish.—Good Housekeeping. Divide the pasture into two or more lots and you will gain in food and milk* Soldier* Too Common. Mother—Kila, you have been playing all the afternoon with these I >y soldiers. Th ifs not a propel amusement for a big girl like you. Daughter—Bul, mamma, I am not In many cases j playing with the soldiers. I picked out the officers and played with them.— Texas Sifter. Drink Water for Disease. It is possible to prevent many diseases and cure others by drinking large quantities of water. An eminent French physician says typhoid fever can be ■washed out of the system by water. He give# his patients what would amount to eight or ten ounces an hour of sterilized water. Experiments have been made with diseases caused by bacteria w'hich demonstrate the curative value of water. In cases of cholera, where the system secretes a large amount of fluid, enormous quantities of hot water are of great benefit and will cure many cases -without other medicines. One doctor says that perfectly sweet, fresh cider, taken in large quantities, has been known to cure diseases of bow'el complaint. The acid kills the bacteria, which are speedily thrown out of the system. Hot water in fevers is of great use, and an ordinary tumblerful of water as hot as can be taken once an hour is one of the very best remedies. The important thing is to get into the system and out of it a sufficient amount of water to prevent the accumulation of ptomaines and toxins within the body.—N. Y. Times. ClrramManrM Alter Gilhooly—The chaplain of the house of representatives gets six dollars for praying only five minutes. Gus De Smith—That’s big pay. I’ve got a friend right here in Dallas who prayed a whole week for a dollar, and didn’t get it.—Texas Sifter. Still Waiting. “I am waiting, only waiting Where the shadows do not fall. After long anticipating., For an early morning call; I am walling, only waiting, Where the Icy waters roll. Keep me not anticipating,” Sang the lonely old North Pole. —Cleveland Plain Dealer. A Safe Bet. “Is your mamma in?” “What's you name?” “I’m Mr. Whitebaod, the new minis- I ter.” “Then I guess mamma’s expectin’ I you—’cause she said she’d bet a dollai you’d be sure to come on washday!”-Cleveland Post. A CON I N DBT M* Very Well Pat. “This, ladies anti gentlemen, is the celebrated trick mule, Dot,” said the clown, as the beast was being led into the ring. “After many years of effort, I am able to say I can make him do anything he wants to.”—Tit-Bits. Sharp Eyed Usher*. He (indignantly)—Those insulting church ushers put us into a back pew. She (calmly as a quiescent volcano)— They probably noticed that I wore a bonnet which I wouldn’t care to have seen.—X. Y. Weekly. Gladness Comes With a better understanding of the transient nature of the many physical ills, which vanish before proper efforts—gentle efforts—pleasant efforts— rightly directed. There is comfort in the knowledge, that so many forms of sickness are not due to any actual disease, but simply to a constipated condition of the system, which the pleasant family laxative, Syrup of Figs. promptly removes. That is why it is the only remedy with millions of families, and is everywhere esteemed so highly by all who value good health. Its beneficial effects are due to the fact, that it is the one remedy which promotes internal cleanliness without debilitating the organs on which it acts. It is therefore all important, in order to get its beneficial effects, to note when you purchase, that you have the genuine article, which is manufactured by the California Fig Syrup Co. only and sold by all reputable druggists. If in the enjoyment of good health, and the system ‘is regular, laxatives or other remedies are then not needed. If afflicted with any actual disease, one may be commended to the most skillful physicians, but if in need of a laxative, one should have the best, and with the well-informed everywhere, Syrup of Figs stands highest and is most largely used and gives most general satisfaction. A Condensed Tragedy. A little drop within a rill That by the sun was kissed Was scooped in by an tee machine And frozen hard, I wist; “Alas!” exclaimed that little drop, “I never will be mist!" —N. Y. Press Puree of Sorrel. Boil a quart of sorrel until tender, then drain and rub through a sieve. Cook together a tablespoonful of butter and two tablespoonfuls of flour, add it to the sorrel and four cupfuls of chicken, veal or beef broth. Let simmer five minutes, season to taste, and serve. A cupful of sweet cream may be added, if liked, just before the puree is taken from the fire. ~    -------- Very Wearying. “Don’t you get awfully tired doing nothing all the time?” asked the young man who thought himself interested in sociology. “Mister,” answered Peary Patettic, “I git so tired doin’ nothin’ that I can’t do nothin* else.”—Cincinnati Enquirer. Proof Positive. “You say she doesn’t care to make herself attractive?” “Not in the least.” “Are you sure of it?” “Positive. She wears bloomers.”— Chicago Post. Hiram Snmmerboard —When kin I col lect this bill? Business Manager—See the puzzle ed itor.—Chicago Tribune.. The Only Safe Plan. Mrs. De Pencil—How is it that you arc never accused of misrepresenting eminent men in your reports of speeches and interviews? Featherbone Edge <*>■ Vs * Ask for It w the next time that you buy a BIAS VELVETEEN SKIRT BINDING. The featherbone flares and stiffens—tho bias velveteen wears as only an S. H.& M. ean wear. Especially suited for silk or Mr. De Pencil (experienced reporter) wool petticoats. I /I An’t    k'Via    t    ♦    Viol*    em*    Kilt    ll    i    ti    t    _ _ — I don’t print what they say, nut w uat they ought to say.—N. Y. Weekly. Not Without Cat!***. Her Friend—I am sorry you are going to marry old Totterer. I hear he is a man who gets violently jealous without cause. She—Don’t worry, dear. I’ll take good care he never does that.—Chicago Tribune. Pursued by a Ghost. Cholly—I believe if I were to see a ghost I should be a chattering idiot. Ethel (dreamily)—Have you seen a ghost?—Town Topics. They All Do It. “I wonder why she screamed when I kissed her.” “Force of habit, I suppooe.”—Town Topics. If your dealer WILL NOT supply you we will. Sampit* shomirg labels and materiala mailed free, " Home Dressmaking Mids Easy.” a new 72 Dago book by M:s3 Emma M. Hooper, of the Ladies’ Homa Journal, tells In plain words how to make dresses at home without previous training; mailed for 25c. S. H. St WL Co.. P. O. Box 699, N. Y, City. This button with a tea ant bn of CANDY CATHARTIC the ideal laxative and guaranteed constipation cure, sent FREE on receipt of five 2-cent stamps. Address STkRUXU RKH!* UT COSlUkXT. CSU***!«l. CU. I    farts __ AUTLg    FHLSr Beet Cough Syruo. Tastes Good. Use in time. Sow by druggists. N SUMPTION

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