Cedar Rapids Gazette (Newspaper) - October 4, 1974, Cedar Rapids, Iowa
Everyone Wants the Gag Writer Used by
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Rubble is all that’s left of the front wall of a house in downtown Lima, which collapsed Thursday during an earthquake. The occupant of the house, an old woman, escaped uninjured before the wall fell
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By Art Bucku,Id
WASHINGTON — Prof Alan Greenspan, chili presidential economic adviser, endeared himself last week to the country with a remark he made to a group of leaders representing the old. sick and handicapped. Greenspan said Wall Street stock brokers have suffered the most from the nation's economic decline.
When I saw Prof. Greenspan say this deadpan on television. I broke into laughter and thought to myself. "The Ford Administration does have humor after all ”
A few minutes later I received a call from a congressman friend asking me if I had written the line for Greenspan
"I wish I had.” I said “It has to be one of the funniest things I ve ever seen on television.”
"Well, could you find out who his writer is? I need some jokes for my campaign this fall, and if Greenspan’s man can come up with any other one-liners as good as this one, I’ll be in clover.”
I called the Council of Economic Advisers and spoke to a man on the phone
“I’m trying to find out who Prof Greenspan's gag writer
"What are you talking about *” the man said “You know. the guy who wrote that line about Wall Street brokers hurting the most from inflation ” I started laughing again as I said it
The man on the other line said frostily, “Prof Greenspan meant every word he said Brokers have suffered the most.” “You apparently believe that Prof Greenspan was joshing at his meeting with the representatives of the old, sick and handicapped But inflation is no joking matter The professor was talking in terms of percentages Whether the old.the sick and the handicapped want to believe it or not. we have statistics to prove that brokers have been hit the hardest.”
“You must remember that, when inflation strikes, bro-keiV commissions, which are fixed by law. are immediately affected. When you have low turnover in Wall Street stocks, the brokers is the first one to feel it Who s hurt by high in terst rates more than anybody else *
"Don’t tell me,” I said chuckling "Let me guess ”
The man hung up on me
"I calles] back my friend in Congress “I know you're not going to believe this,” I said. “But Greenspan writes his own jokes ”
"I’ll Im* damned,” said my friend "You mean the lines about the brokers was his? ”
“Yup Grenspan’s a fountain of mirth, and he comes up with things like that all the time It must Im* great for the President to have somebody like that around to take his mind off the economy."
Dunked On Way to Altar
Enroute to the altar in a canoe. Gene Tubbs and Kay Gorman took a waved to a friend and the craft turned over. The damp couple showed dunking. The couple were nosing in to land at the Alps, five miles west up 15 minutes later for their outdoor wedding of Leavenworth, Wash., on the Wenatchee river, when the bridegroom
Oo/Ht t Photo bv John Mc Ivor
Last Time, Maybe
Dutifully leading the band during halftime ceremonies for the Chicago Fire-Charlotte Stars WFL game, the band conductor appears unaware of the show going on behind him — the Firettes doing their thing
Marvin Peden. 739 Gateway street NE, a city parks department employe, was busy mowing grass in Van Vechten park Thursday, hopefully for the last time this season Householders view the end of the mowing with mixed feelings because they know it won’t be too long before there’s snow to shovel
Weeping quake victim prays * * i a Lima street following pow- .
•ful tremors which raked east- ^ *n Peru with death and deruction Thursday, toppling uildings, knocking out commu-ications, and creating mass ysteria.
Robert and Chris Morley of Victor. N. Y , south of Rochester, enjoy a little play in the early snowfall which left 4 to ti inches in certain areas of the Rochester vicinity and caused many traffic problems Thursday.
AP Wirephoto (Copy'SPO IV/4 t OA Angeles T