New Braunfels Herald Zeitung, May 29, 1996, Page 4

New Braunfels Herald Zeitung

May 29, 1996

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Issue date: Wednesday, May 29, 1996

Pages available: 16

Previous edition: Tuesday, May 28, 1996

Next edition: Thursday, May 30, 1996

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Publication name: New Braunfels Herald Zeitung

Location: New Braunfels, Texas

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New Braunfels Herald Zeitung (Newspaper) - May 29, 1996, New Braunfels, Texas T IUPRNOII ■ To talk with Managing Edita Doug Lovcday about the Opinion page, call 625-9144, ext. 21 H o r n I cl - Z u ii g ■pinion Onlin* contact ■ To submit letters and guest columns electronically by way of online services or Internet, a to simply contact staff members, the managing editor’s address is DLovedayOAOL.com. 0 U O T “I understand newspapers are a business, (bat) I wish newspapers aide money to do a better Job of serving the readers.” — Geneva Overholser journalist 1995 EDITORIALKUDOSQuick action from local volunteer fire departments salvages man’s business (KUDOS is a regular feature cf the Herald-Zeitung in which readers can thank or recognize the work or support cf individuals and organizations in our community. To submit an item for KUDOS, write to: Herald-Zeitung, c/o KUDOS, 707 banda St, New Braunfels, TX 78130.) ■ A phone call in the early hours of the morning brought to reality the fear our family had since the extreme dry weather B&gan—FIRE From our bedroom window we saw the flames leaping toward the overhead electric lines. Our business was on fire! Icalled 911 and then headed for the office to remove the files and get the dogs. The animals were already yapping in fear as the black smoke bellowed over their pen. The firefighters arrived quickly and began the exhausting task of containing the blaze. Thanks to the efforts of many nameless firefighters, a potential disaster was limited to minimal damage. Seeing the red eyes of weary men in heavy suits working to save a business made me aware of the difficulty and danger involved in their job. These men risk their lives constantly as part of their job. It certainly isn’t an easy way to make a living, and remember many *    i*    *i •*.* v'-if •• >.»< v irirtnfi(;r> i rural firefighters are volunteers. .    k>    „    .    ••    *    -im.    WjV    , It must be extremely frustrating to these men to realize that carelessness and deliberate acts of arson are responsible for many of the fires. If you see anyone throwing a match or cigarette out carelessly, caution them about the dangers. If anyone has any information concerning persons who may be deliberately setting fires, contact the local fire marshal. The firefighters of this area will be very busy during this dry season unless YOU help prevent these needless fires. Thanks to all the firefighters who came to our aid. Thank God no one was injured. Most appreciatively The KaderUfamilyWrite us... The New Braunfels Herald-Zeitung welcomes letters on any public issue. The editor reserves the right to correct spelling, style, punctuation and known factual errors. Letters should be kept to 280 words. We publish only original mail address od to tha New Braunfels Herald-Zeitung bearing the writer's signature. Also, an address and a telsphone number, which are not for publication, must be included. Please cite the page number and date of any article that is mentioned. Preference is given to writers who have not beal published in the previous 30 days. Mail letters toe Letters to the Editor c/o the New Braunfels Herald-Zeitung P.O. Drawer 311328 New Braunfels, Texas 78131-1328 Fax:(210)625-1224CPA learns to hold his tongue Just when life was beginning to lose its sense of whimsy I had to attend a seminar in professional ethics. Not that I felt any particular need to refine my personal outlook on dealing with others. I’m sure dux people who know me best, for instance my mother, would say, “He’s such a nice boy.’’ ’ So I probably would not have spent the money to atmid this ethics course, except that I am required to spend four hours every three years being taught my ethical responsibilities, as defined by the Texas State Board of Public Accountancy. My personal feeling is that once society becomes so uncivil feat people don’t act from ethical ideals as a matter of their own mature accord, we aren’t going to improve things much by writing down a bunch of rales. The Ten Commandants, in their sublime simplicity, would have served mankind quite well lo these many centuries if people paid any attention to them. Still, this is America, and everyone is entitled to his own stupid opinion. So I sat through this required ethics course, taught by a lawyer, if you can imagine. Professional ethics for CPAs don’t prohibit just obvious misbehavior such as embezzlement, falsifying financial statements or tax returns, or cheating on the CPA exam. I was greatly alarmed to learn feat CPAs also may not make “public allegations of a lack of mental capacity of a client which can not be sup-ported in fact’’ Presumably this means that if I want to call someone crazy in public, I have to resign as their accountant first. CPA: “But your Honor, when I called Mr. Clam-dandruff a stupid moron in front of the other City Council members he was a FORMER client.” Judge: “Right you are, sir. Case dismissed!” Note that the CPA cannot be found guilty of this discreditable act if his client’s lack of mental Capac Charles Allen ity CAN be supported in fact. When the CPA gets hauled up in front of the administrative judge, his lawyer cannot claim feat it never happened, if there were witnesses. His only defense then is to demonstrate that the complainant really is nuts. So to save his CPA client, the lawyer will have to make an excruciating review of fee plaintiffs personal words and acts, line up witnesses who will testify that the plaintiff regularly shows up naked at piano recitals, for example, and arrange for a psychiatrist to testify about the patent craziness of all of this. The government lawyer will do the same tiling in reverse to show that the complainant is the model of sobriety and decorum. In order to find the CPA not guilty the administrative judge must conclude that the complainant is in feet crazy. This finding will then be reviewed for ratification by the entire board. Imagine having your sanity determined by a governmental committee of accountants. I don’t know which would be worse: to be judged crazy by them, or to be judged sane. This reminds me of a case related to me by my brother, a California lawyer. It seems that one Californian, in a fit of angry frustration at dealing wife one of his fellow citizens, publicly called him a crude, inflammatory, and unflattering name. I’ll not repeat it here; this is a family newspaper, and there’s no need for people to use that kind of language when they’re not even playing golf. The general connotation of this term is an “extremely unlikable fellow.” Anyway, acting in the best tradition of California society the man sued, alleging slander. As in the example cited above the defense lawyer had no choice other than to prove that the plaintiff really was an “extremely unlikable fellow.” So he lined up dozens of witnesses who each testified about the man’s behavior toward others. Facing an avalanche of evidence the judge found for the defendant Because the defense lawyer had been so organized and precise in revealing the plaintiffs character, showing each facet of it in stalk detail, the judge cited each such attribute in his decision. The result is that the state of California has given us a legal definition of that slang term which popularly describes an “extremely unlikable fellow”, or to refer to it in print an EUF. I’m thinking of having some checklists printed up (accountants just love checklists) which list all of the legal attributes of an EUF. As I encounter candidates for this appellation, I could start checking off each qualification as I observe it When the candidate finally meets all of the criteria, I could hand him his (or her, let’s be fair) citation wife my congratulations. “Well done, sir (or madam)! You have just shown yourself to meet all of the legal requirements to be called an EUF under authority of the courts of the State of California who ought to know an EUF when they see one. I hereby present you wife your personal certificate of authenticity, which attests to your status in society and entitles you to all of the rights, honors, and privileges thereunto appertaining. You EUF.” I would do this, except that it would be VERY WRONG. And unethical. (Charles T. Allen is a New Braunfels, Texas CPA and humorist whose professional practice involves the creation cf all manner cf humorous works cf fiction.) WY toe ridiculous. im doesn't Qainr unifi&weaarao.' Id brie I * L Voice recorder indicates fire in ValuJet cabin By JIM ABRAMS Associated Press Writer New BraunfelsHerald-Zeitung Edita and Publisher...........................................................Doug    Toney Managing Edita...........................................................Doug    Loveday Directa of Advertising.................................................Debbie    Banta-Soott Retail Advertising Manager...............................................Jack    Osteen Accounting Manager........................................................Mary    Lee Hall Circulation Directa....................................................Carol    ton    Avery Pressroom Faeman...........................................................Billy    Parnell City Edita.....................................................................Roger    Croteau Published on Sunday mornings and weekday mornings Tueiday through (today by the New Braunfels Herald-Zeitung (USPS 377-880) 707 Lands St, or P.O. Drawer 311328, New Braunfels, Comal County, Tx. 78131-1323. Secondclass postafe paid by die New Braunfels Herald-Zeitung in New Braunfels, Texas. Carrier delivered in Comal and Guadalupe counties: three months. $2030; six months, $37; one year, $66. Senior Cidaen Discounts by earner dehvwy only: six months, $33; one year. $62. Mail delivery outside Conal County in Texas: three months, $30.30; six months, $55; one year, $103 JO. Mail outsideTexas: dx months, $78; one year, SI 18.25. Subscribers who have not received a newpaper by 5:30 pm Tueadey through Friday or by 7:30 arn on Sunday may call (210) 625-9144 or by 7 pm workday or by ll ajn on Sunday. Postmaster: Send address chances lo the New Brauefels Hentld-Zeitmg, P.O. Draw-311328, New Brautfeb, Tx. 78131-1328. WASHINGTON (AP) — Just minutes after Val-uJet’s doomed flight 592 took off from Miami, the cockpit door apparently opened and fire was reported in fee passenger cabin. Moments later the jet dived into the Everglades killing all I IO aboard. How the door opened remains a mystery. Investigators declined today to go beyond National Transportation Safety Board Vice Chairman Robert Francis’ statement a day earlier that “it appears” the door opened. Cockpit doors on airliners normally are kept locked. Sources who spoke on condition of anonymity said the door could have been opened because someone knocked on it, by a flight attendant with a key or some other way. Investigators say it may be weeks before the sounds on the badly battered cockpit voice recorder can be Today In History By The Associated Press Today is Wednesday, May 29, the 150th day of 1996. TYrere are 216 days left in the year. Today’s Highlight in History: On May 29,1765, Patrick Henry denounced the Stamp Act before Virginia’s House of Burgesses. Responding to a cry of Treason!, Henry replied, “If this be treason, make the most of it!” On this date: In 1790, Rhode Island became the 13th original Colony to ratify the United States Constitution. In 1848, Wisconsin became tire 30th state of the union. In 1917, the 35th president of the United States, John F. Kennedy, was bom in Brookline, Mass. In 1932, Worid War I veterans began arriving in Washington to demand cash bonuses they weren’t scheduled to receive for another 13 years. In 1943, Norman Rockwell’s portrait of Rosie fully analyzed, but they have released preliminary findings. About six minutes after tire DC-9 took off from Miami International Airport, “It appears that the cockpit door opened (and) there were verbal indications from the cockpit that there was fire in the passenger cabin,” Francis said. The tape ftom tire cockpit voice recorder, recovered from the Everglades muck Sunday, also contains “indications from the cabin that there were problems obtaining oxygen.” Francis offered no other details, saying the examination of the tape has just begun and the information on it is “very, very difficult to decipher at this point." But the tape appears to back up other indications of fire in the cabin of the (feme before the May 11 crash. Investigators said Sunday they had found the aluminum frame of a passenger seat that was partially melted and heavily damaged by fire. Investigator Gregory Feife said it would take temperatures of at the Riveter appeared on the cover of Tire Saturday Evening Post. In 1953, Mount Everest was conquered as Edmund Hillary of New Zealand and Tensing Norkay of Nepal became the first climbers to reach tire summit. In 1973, Tom Bradley was elected the first black mayor of Los Angeles, defeating incumbent Sam Yorty. In 1985, 35 people were killed and hundreds injured in rioting that erupted between British and Italian spectators at the European Cup soccer final in Brussels, Belgium. In 1988, President Reagan began his first visit to the Soviet Union as he arrived in Moscow, where he opened his superpower summit wife Soviet leader Mikhail S. Gorbachev. In 1990, Boris N. Yeltsin was elected president of the Russian republic in tire third round of balloting by the Russian parliament. Ten years ago: Some of the United States’ closest allies urged the Reagan administration at a NATO foreign ministers’ meeting in Halifax, Nova Scotia, least 500 degrees to cause that type of damage. Investigators also found a blackened support structure and smoke-damaged floor beams, both from inside the passenger cabin. Before losing communication wife air traffic controllers, tire pilots had indicated wife “a considerable sense of urgency” that there was smoke in tire cockpit and in the passenger cabin, NTSB officials have said previously. As a possible cause for the fire, attention has focused on 119 oxygen canisters that were being carried in tire plane’s front cargo hold. The canisters, which ValuJet was not authorized to cany as cargo, contain a volatile mix of chemicals used to provide oxygen to passenger emergency masks. The aluminum casing for the magnetic recording tape, shown to reporters, was deeply gouged from hitting something upon impact, and it took several hours for NTSB officials, working through tire night Sunday, to remove the 30-minute tape. not to scrap the SALT II arms accord. Five years ago: President Bush, addressing tire U.S. Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs, Colo., unveiled a plan to curb “unnecessary and destabilizing weapons” in tire Middle East. One year ago: The last three bodies entombed in the Alfred P. MUriah Federal Building in Oklahoma City were recovered. Margaret Chase Smith, the first woman to serve in both tire House and the Senate, died in Skowhegan, Maine, at age 97. Today's Birthdays: Comedian Bob Hope is 93. Former Baseball Commissioner Fay Vincent is 58. Race car driver Al Unser Sr. is 57. Actor Helmut Berger is 52. Actor Anthony Geary is 49. Actress Annette Baling is 38. Singer Melissa Etheridge is 35. Thought for Today: “Like other spurious things, fastidiousness is often inconsistent wife itself, fee coarsest tilings are done, and the cruelest things said by tire most fastidious people.” — Caroline Matilda: Stansbury Kirkland, American author (1801-1864)^ ;

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