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New Braunfels Herald-Zeitung (Newspaper) - March 3, 1995, New Braunfels, Texas HeraldZeitung Friday March 3 1995 Church Life To talk with Managing Editor Mark Lyon about Church Life call 6259144 Church Life Judith Miller Parenting seminar is good investment for any couple I remember the feeling so well Josh was only about four We were together in the he and a busy but cold rainy day I was standing at the counter preoccupied doing traditional mommy things while he played cars on the the typical boychild motor sounds What 1 cant remember is how the con versation started or what 1 asked him that provoked his response But I do recall being absolutely shocked at the tone in his preschool voice when he answered Josh 1 responded in my firm mother voice Dont you talk back to me Silence I con tinued to work while 1 let a few moments pass then rephrased the question for him Once again he answered in the same exasperated tone Stunned I made the immediate decision that this manner of speaking was not permissible in my kitchen Joshua 1 retorted in my adult voice do not talk back to me Silence again After a few deep breaths to regain my composure I tried one final time to get a simple answer to what I had deemed a rea sonable question This time there was no reply Only silence Eardeafening total silence With frustration and emerging anger I turned toward where he had been playing in the room looked down and instantly caught my breath Standing there just inches from me and looking up direct ly into my eyes was my beautiful child his eyes filling with big alligator tears his lower lip quivering I said softly as I fell to my knees to look at him on his level Whats the matter Why arent you answering me With a thin voice breaking into larger and larger sobs he spoke want I dont know how You keep telling me not to talk back At once his face and the tone of his voice drove an iron stake through my heart His words cleaved agiant canyon in my brain How incredibly stupid I had been And how childish Instantly I knew that he had never meant to engage in a contest of will with this overwhelm ing adult whom he wholeheartedly trusted and lovingly called Now too late I also foolishly realized that he had no concept in his young mind of the old expression talk back with which I had persistently accosted him Automatically I reached out my arms and his little body melted into them With his head tucked snugly under my chin I could feel his wet tears on my face while at the same time my body absorbed his shaking heavy sobs My own tears began to flow as we sat there hug ging gently rocking on the cool kitchen floor Oh I said tenderly Im so just wasnt just didnt just didnt There was no way to adequate ly apologize to my confused and brokenhearted four year old Perhaps for not for me I realized powerfully in that moment that in spite of my tremendous love for this child despite an education in early childhood development and notwithstanding my resolve to be a truly good parenting was a skill for which I had been grossly illprepared 1 needed help I need ed to seek guidance I needed to learn how to pray daily for Gods forgiveness and grace in caring for this wonderful child of His whom He entrusted to me I was not then and am not now alone in this realization and this task of parenting It has been said by many that being a parent is perhaps one of the most important roles of our adult yet unfortunately the one for which we are the least prepared But we can change that We can each make a commitment and a step in a posi tive direction Next week March 511 has been declared Family Intimacy Week in New Braunfels It is a time for us to consciously review and renew the physical emotional and spiritual ties we have in our families It is also an opportunity for us to learn that we can develop our ability to better parent our children at whatever age or in whatever situation they happen to be One excellent way is to be there on Saturday when Dr Paul Warren and Ms Teresa Ferguson come to town to lead the Parenting With Intimacy workshop sponsored by local churches schools and community leaders Yes it is an investment of energy Yes it is an investment of time and money But it is above all an investment in a loving and healthy family for you and for and a movement toward a stronger and more compassionate community for all of us Josh He thrived Hes eigh teen now my favorite and only child who is about to graduate from high school and leave for college in the fall But Ill be there at the Parenting Workshop next Saturday See I know I still have lots to learn Ive got the rest of my life to be Joshs mother LEARNING To BE A BETTER PARENT 1 Did you know that The fastest grow ing segment of the crim inal population is our nations children Teenage sexuality will result in one mil lion pregnancies lead ing to abortions in 1995 alone Since 1960 the teen suicide rate has more than tripled According to Edward Ziglcr professor at Yale University for every successful sui cide there are 50 to 100 adolescent suicide attempts Using conservative estimates more than 5 percent of all teenagers tried to take their lives in 1990 compared with 1 percent in 1960 In of high school students had used marijuana and 88 had used alco hol Homicide is the leading cause of death for males 1825 years old We are saturated by the routine of tragedy concerning the children of our nation Lets face it when the six oclock news comes on and the headline report is of another driveby shooting or gangrelated affair our normal response is Thank God I dont live in San Dallas or Houston or any other major city For those of us who are fortunate to live in the fami lyfriendly atmosphere of New Braunfels those reports seem a world away And that is the deception Do you really think that it is strictly a matter of location that keeps families intact Do you really believe that living in one place instead of another is what will keep the drugs vio lence and depression from capturing your kids If you do you arc living in a dream world Here arc some other statistics Read them carefully for the sake of our kids Teenagers from broken homes arc 6 times more likely to become involved in delinquent behavior Boys involved in violent misbehavior were 11 times more likely to live in homes without their father Promiscuity among young girls is sig nificantly higher from singleparent homes Alcohol abuse among teens from bro ken homes is notably collapse of family structure causing traumatic sepa ration Children from singleparent house holds arc nearly 3 times more likely to drop out of school when compared with students from intact families 7 drop out from intact families 20 from singleparent 1 talked with Karen Simpson Executive Director of Education Services of NBISD to get her feedback What she said to me was alarming Karen attributes the need for the new alternative that arc now part of both school districts directly to the result of the deterioration of the family structure What has happened is this Over the past years the number of kids that cannot func tion in a normal school environment has grown to the point where alternative edu cation is necessary No matter how you feel concerning whose responsibility it is it is the school districts responsibility to edu cate every child in The best way to do that is to establish a satellite campus to deal with severe behavioral problems This is effective but labor intensive and expen sive Again the experts in our community point first to the deterioration of the family structure as the culprit In other words economic and social inequalities arc not the issue The key factor to the success of our childrens generation is rooted in good marriages and strong fam ilies The question for us as a community is how do we help families escape the down ward spiral that many of them live in I know that as a community we can not demand that people get help with their mar riages and families 1 know that no one can be forced to change behavior that is destructive But what we can do is join together as a com munity and provide the opportunities for families and marriages to be successful along with the support encouragement and extended care for those families that have broken That is why over 20 churches have linked arms with Charles Bradbcrry and the NBISD administration New Braunfels Christian Academy the HeraldZeitung New Braunfels City Council members local doctors and the Center for Marriage and Family Intimacy in Austin to provide one of the best seminars on parenting avail able in the Dr Paul Warren author behavioral pedi atrician and adolescent specialist with the MinirthMeier Clinic will be hosted by the team of churches and schools for a Parenting with Intimacy Seminar on Saturday March 11 Paul will be joined by Tcrri Ferguson who coordinates academic instruction for adoles cents at the Minirth Mcicr Clinic in Hous ton Dr Paul Warren The seminar is for par ents of all singles young and old It is designed to Equip parents to shape the emotional intellectual and spiritual development of their preschool children Impart the essential ingredients of complaint behavior and responsibility to their school age children Equip parents for the challenges of the teenage years Help parents rebounding from the pain t of drugs suicide attempts and moral com promise You can register through your church or by calling 18008818008 The cost is min imal and the investment of your time will pay dividends for a lifetime So lets do something for our communi ty Lets do something for our kids Call today and register for this important community effort to equip parents and schools for the most important task that we will ever face Dennis Gallaher is pastor of Freedom Fellowship Church in New Founders Day Breakfast scheduled for March 21 As part of the 1995 Sesquicentennial celebration the Cham ber is sponsoring a citywide ecumenical event the Founders Day Prayer Breakfast It will be at the Civic Center on March 21 at 7 Jim Scheele Director of the Convention arjd Visitors Bureau is the Chambers representative on the Founders Day Religious Activities Committee which is chaired by the Rev Daryl C Higgins As part of the breakfast program descendants of the founding fathers will be recognized and table centerpiece displays will provide pictorial glimpses of the past 150year history of New Braunfels The internationally known inspirational authorpastor Rev Dr Bruce Larson will be the keynote speaker Molly Joes Catering will provide a catered breakfast featuring foods enjoyed by the first settlers Tickets for the early settlers breakfast are 10 per person and can be purchased at the Chamber Sts Peter and Paul Catholic Church St Paul Lutheran Church First Protestant Church and New Braunfels Presbyterian Church located on Howard Other Founders Day religious activities include an afternoon Book Signing Party and an evening Founders Day Worship The Book Signing for the Rev Dr Bruce Lar son will be held in the Reno and Evelyne Schumann Hall of First Protestant Church Dr Larson has authored 23 books Some of his most recent titles are Living Beyond Our Fears The Presence Faith For the Journey and A Call to Holy Living His newest book is entitled What God Wants to Know June Pace of the Book Trader bookstore is assisting the committee in organizing the event and providing copies of several of the books authored by Dr Larson for purchase at the book signing HeraldZeitung photo MICHAEL DARNALL Ash Wednesday services Msgr Eugene OCallaghan of Sts Peter and Paul Catholic Church places ashes on Mandy Brandt while her mother Pam watches during Ash Wednesday services held Wednesday According to Father OCallaghan several thousand attended services throughout the day The Rev Judith Milter is pastor of St Paul Lutheran Church For more information about the Pgreating Wilh Intimacy workshop or to register Area briefs FUMC presenting Lenten luncheons Every Friday during Lent First United Methodist Church will present the Lenten Community Lunches from These are ecumenical services for the entire community and will be held in Wes ley Hall located in the back of the church off of Mill Street On Friday March 3 the guest speaker will be Rev Bert Clayton of Canyon Lake United Methodist Church Soloist for the service will be Cathy Tal cott Everyone is asked to bring a sack lunch and the church will provide beverages For more information call 6254513 NBCA hosting Parent Enrichment Night New Braunfels Christian Academy will present a PARENT ENRICHMENT NIGHT Tuesday March in the NBCA library The public is invited Scott and Susan Tjernagel will be the speakers discussing Nurturing Your Childs This fun and informative evening is designed to help parents recognize the need to nurture their child spiritually as well as answer your questions on subjects such as How to Teach your Child About Answering Difficult and Using the Bible as a Family Scott and Susan Tjernagel are both teach ers at NBCA Scott pastors Mission Valley Bible Church and they both serve on New Braun fels Young Life Commission The Tjer nagels have three children Call New Braunfels Christian Academy for additional information 6296222 NBCA students to clean Landa Park On March 10 students from New Braun fels Christian Academy will be contributing their time to clean and spruce up Landa Park in anticipation of New Braunfels 150th Birthday Celebration Their jobs will include washing and wax ing the antique fire engine polishing the plaques surrounding Founders Oak and lots of general cleaning This work will benefit our community and give the students a real sense of pride and accomplishment Rev Higgins to speak at FUMC Lenten luncheon Rev Daryl Higgins minister of First Protestant Church will be the guest speaker at the Community Lenten Lunch on Fri day March 10 The ecumenical lunches sponsored by First United Methodist Church will take place every Friday during Lent from Everyone is asked to bring a sack lunch and the church will provide beverages The lunches will take place in Wesley located on the back side of First Unit ed Methodist Church off of Mill Street For more information call 6254513 FUMC hosting pancake sup per March 6 Its time once again for the First United Methodist Church of New Braunfels 572 W San Antonio to host their annual Pancake Supper Please join us on Monday March 6 in Wesley Hall from 5 for All You Can Eat pancakes sausage and beverages The cost is for adults and for children Wesley Hall is easily accessible from the Mill Street parking lot of the church All proceeds from the event will be donated to local community service agen cies and projects The recipients of last years funds were the Child Welfare Board the Comal County Child Advocacy Center Comal County Emergency Childrens Cen ter Comal County MHMR Comal County Womens Center Homespun Hospice Lit eracy Council NBISD and CISD Nurses Discretionary Funds Project Graduation Teen Connection and Habitat for Humani ty Join us for an evening of food fellowship and fun and in showing support for our valuable community services The Appointment to be featured at Calvary Baptist The one of the most widely used Christian films in the country with nearly 5000 showings will be shown at Calvary Baptist Church 2386 San Anto nio on Friday March 10 at 7 Its the story of Liz Watson who writes a series of antiGod and antichurch editorials for her news magazine St Johns hosting Ed Langham March 8 The Stephen Ministry logo begins with a cross On either side of the cross stand line drawings of a broken person and a whole per son According to the explanation provided by Stephen Ministry headquarters the cross is an everpresent reminder that it is God who is active transforming broken people into whole people For Stephen Ministers the cross provides the motivation for caring ministry This symbol also says something about our role as Christian caregivers Our caring is an expression of Gods love made real for all God provides the cure through our care Ed Langham who is in charge of Stephen Ministries at St Johns Episcopal Church will discuss this unique oneonone Christdriven ministry Wednesday March at St Johns 312 S Guenther Everyone who is interested is more than welcome to attend this gathering which will begin with a potluck supper at All Stephen of especially invited
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